I write this full of hope and with an encouraging testimony of God's Perfect Timing. DH (40) and me (36) have been married almost 12 years. We have DS age 8 and DD age 5. About 2 years ago, I started feeling like there was one more little soul out there for us. It took me 6 mos of praying about it and talking with moms with kids similar ages to convince myself that this was the best thing for my family and not the result of me growing older. The idea of starting all over when my kids are just getting independent had me very undecided. Sept 2016 I tried to broach the subject with DH and he was adamantly against it. Fast forward to January 2017, I decide that i want to remove my IUD because it will expire this year. Hubby understands, but starts talking about vasectomy which sends me into a tailspin. For months (felt like years) we went around and around the subject every date night, every long night talking in bed, and not getting any closer to being aligned with direction and goals. Sex has become a battleground where he either pulls out or insists on wearing a condom, and about 1x a month, he either forgets or "slips up".
Fast forward again to May 2017. I start feeling those feelings that only mothers know... tingly nips, cramping way too far in advance of AF, June 1st 2017, BFP! Picture this, I'm elated while DH is pouting. Fast forward again, July 2017, first ultrasound, empty sac, cue utter devastation and depression. Deep sadness, loneliness, body betrayal, heart is shattered. DH and I are still not aligned. Still having challenging conversations, but I am convicted that this 3rd pregnancy and baby is meant for us and critical to my overall happiness.
Fast forward to November 2017, my period is 5 days late, i take countless tests, and symptom spot everything... devastated again when my AF arrives 7 days late. December, something has changed in my husband, he sees how sad I am. He starts to recite some of the things that i've been saying to him over the past 1.5 years. He says that he finally understands and agrees that 2018, in June specifically, we'll start baby making, enough time for him to mentally prepare for another pregnancy and child. **Alignment** Cue the happy tears and enormous weight lifted!
NOW picture NYE 1/1/18 , great date night, we have a wonderful dinner, we go out dancing like we're 20 yo again. Madly in love. BD 2-3x (honestly can't recall) between 2am- 5am!! No condoms, no inhibitions= WHOA! The following week 1/5/18, similar BD activity, another date night, booze flowing and wild passionate night, no condoms, no pulling out, and lingerie involved!
Now for all the juicy details: 32 average AF cycle, O on CD 18-20
CD 18 1/5/18: EWCM, BD 2x despite having a head cold, sinus pressure, runny nose, napped mid day. BBT 98.0
CD 19 Suspected Ovulation date: 1/6/18- nothing remarkable, CM dried up. BBT 97.6 (Big dip)
DPO 1: BD, CM dry other than while DTD, Napped again midday, trapped gas BBT 98.0
DPO 2: 3 BM's very loose, car sickness after having sushi with friends for lunch. Cold symptoms again BBT 97.9
DPO 3: nothing remarkable, 2 BM's loose stool again (TMI) BBT 98.4
DPO 4: Cramps with FMU, nips tingly? I can't tell. High stress at work BBT 98.5
DPO 5: Tried Zumba class mid day at work with coworkers- I'm so sore, rib cage hurts? Cramps again, Vivid dreams. Shitty memory, couldn't think of the word parasail while playing a game with my family. BBT 98.6
DPO 6: Up during the night to pee. Chiropractic- adjustment. Late evening feels like i'm getting sick again, spot in my throat feels sore when I swallow. By morning symptoms vanish. BBT 98.5
DPO 7: Head up to VT for a weekend with adults. Slept in the car. Nips definitely tingly. Embarrassingly forgetful in front of friends. ST memory is total crap. Can't remember actors names and literally stop talking mid sentence because i'm so aware of my forgetfulness. BD that night but it was BONE DRY. Like uncomfortable :( Zero CM. BBT 98.9
DPO 8: Still at the log cabin in VT. ST memory fails left and right. Hot apple cider gave me raging heartburn. BD= completely dry again, uncomfy... burning sensation in abdomen. BBT 98.6
DPO 9: Nips definitely tingly. Finally satisfied my craving for an eggroll!! Whiteheads on my forehead, more heartburn. Burning in abdomen and cramping before bed. BBT 98.3 (Implantation dip?!)
DPO 10: BBT 98.6 temp goes back up.... OMG am I really pregnant?! Low back aches, more heartburn when eating. Don't want coffee- very unusual for me.
DPO 11: BBT 98.6 (temp stays up!!) BD 2x, not so dry down there anymore. Boobs hurt during BD. Gassy and heartburn after eating.
DPO 12: BBT 98.8 (That's it, i'm testing today, I can't wait another 3 days!) Still don't want coffee. BFP with FMU!! Going to take a digital test on Monday (when AF is officially late) and show that one to hubby in a special way.