TMI alert ahead!
I wouldn't give up. I was DETERMINED to be pregnant except in my frequent moments of depression when I lost hope (depression was my #1 clue with my previous child as well). I wished for a BFP on every railroad track and crossroads that I drove across for 2 weeks. It was my fervent and only wish. I didn't say "it's in God's hands" or "if it is His will." I demanded my pregnancy from the universe. Those of you who truly believe in magic...try wishing on railroad tracks. The Goddess has never let me down. I simply reminded Her of that fact.
We were only able to BD until 2 days before I ovulated. I have PCOS. My cycles never went back to normal after breastfeeding DD1. The odds were against me.
I took a Multivitamin and folic acid. Soy Isoflavones cd 2-6 200 mg at 7 am every morning and spent the day in the sun when I could. I put a pillow under my butt after sex and masturbated (clitoral) until orgasm to suck up the sperm after BD. We used Preseed and he took a multivitamin with zinc starting 3 months ago. I had 2 days of spotting starting 3 days before O.
I confirmed O with temping BUT it's possible I could have o'd up to 4 days earlier than what FF thinks (based on EWCM). Wasn't using OPKs.
Here are my symptoms:
1-2 dpo: Bad ovulation(?) cramps at night, couldn't sleep through them. Small sharp pains in clit, momentarily. Sweating a lot, no fever. Hungry. Wet spot in nightshirt over left nipple! Haven't produced milk in 8 months!! Lots of creamy CM, can feel it coming down. Sweaty all day with stinky farts.
2-3 dpo: Heartburn @ midnight so bad I can't sleep. Breasts full, nipples almost painfully erect. And for some reason it smells like skunk? Upon waking, my hips and knees ache, my lips are chapped and head is pounding. Very low cramps, feels like a UTI. I just know I am/will be pregnant. Pinching pain in right armpit. Milk is literally rolling down my chest and belly @ 1pm.
3-4 dpo: I have the glow! Cramps after orgasm. Bitter taste in mouth at dinner, could have scraped off some of the nasty nonstick coating of the pot. Nauseous at 11pm ugh I could maybe puke if I wanted to. My right breast (the little one) is unusually full, feels like it has milk.
4-5 dpo: Got 2 "evaps" today, morning and night, 2 different brands. Weird. Boobs heavy and full. Slept all morning (3-4 hrs). Bitter taste in mouth in afternoon, cranberry juice made me nauseous for an hour, boobs felt full of milk while grocery shopping.
5-6 dpo: Towards the end of the day I was so sad b/c I don't feel pregnant anymore. But today while shopping at various stores I was having hot flashes, being very irritable and getting sweaty, so maybe there is hope :-/ also, a word on constipation -- I have very frequent bowel movements but have been cramping beforehand, and some of them are hard poops.
6-7 dpo: Dizzy, with hot flashes and very low cramps during the work day. Sort of ghost lines on a FRER, and on a dollar store test after the allowed 5 minutes, not sure if they are evaps or dye runs. So incredibly depressed this evening. I feel I'm not pregnant :'-( just before midnight, truly horrible heartburn and sooo thirsty all day.
7-8 dpo: Got a disappearing line on a blue dye Walgreens ept-like test around midnight. Arghhh so frustrated. Whoa hot flash HEAT WAVE! My boobs hurt, the nipples itch, and I'm dizzy. Why is my body f-ing with me like this?? This is CRUEL. At 1230pm had weird sharp stabbing, shooting pains in left breast at the hair salon, NEVER had that before. Oh and a few days ago had very vivid dream about my front tooth getting huge and needing to be pulled. Also, around 8pm very low, UTI-like cramps.
8-9 dpo: Forgot to temp today :( Well that's not true. Woke up too depressed and discouraged to reach for the thermometer. Super vivid dreams, of [my dog] howling at three moons converging in the sky into the goddess sign. Very very low cramps and to the side. I truly believe my period is coming :-( LOTS of gas, cramping all day. Painfully erect nipples at 8pm.
9-10 dpo: HORRIBLE cramping in gut 5pm-8pm, the kind that made me break out in sweat and chills. [Hindsight note: implantation??] Diarrhea for hours (regular poop color and no sick poop smell).
10-11 dpo: Just past midnight, can't sleep horrible dull back pain, flu-like achy joints in hips, knees, thighs. The back pain (like contractions) makes me cautiously hopeful. Passed out in bed at 9pm.
11-12 dpo: Dizzy when lifting 25 lb DD1. Constipated, which I shouldn't be after all that fruit for breakfast. Also my pee smells like delicious steak seasoning - weird.
12 dpo: BFP!!