It was the morning of 10DPO. I was heading to a baby shower around noon, so I was in a rush. I almost didn't test. After dipping my Wondfo stick, I went on about getting ready for the day and came back a few minutes later. Much to my disappointment, there was a huge dye run on the test right where the pregnancy line would have been. I put the test on the windowsill and hardly thought anything of it, telling myself that I'd do another later in the day to make up for the "bad" one. At the baby shower, a very pregnant friend and I were discussing who would "be next" and she suspected it would be me. I smiled a little and brushed it off -- she didn't know we were actually trying then -- naming another friend instead.
Somehow, I managed to "hold it" all the way through the shower and until I got home. I did another Wondfo test and stepped away for a few minutes. Much to my surprise, there was a very faint, pinkish second line! I immediately started Googling for pictures of faint positive Wondfo tests and texted my best friend with the tentative news. I had to pee again two hours later, so I took another test not expecting much and got a definine colored second line! I knew then that I had my first BFP...and my husband and I were expecting our first baby. He happened to wake up earlier than normal for his night shift at work and saw the tests on the windowsill, so my plan to surprise him with the news was spoiled. But I didn't care...we were pregnant. :)
A few days and many positive tests later, I was beginning to get worried. The lines on the tests weren't really getting any darker. I talked to a friend and did a little Google searching to ease my mind, but I couldn't get rid of that nagging feeling that something might be wrong. My earliest symptoms slowly faded away (so slowly that I didn't even notice they were gone). I had a constant achy feeling and some sharp pains in my pelvic area, but I thought that was normal for pregnancy so didn't think much of it.
On the morning of December 17th, 10 days after that first positive test, I woke up and noticed a little spotting on the toilet paper. I went about getting ready for work -- it was my last day at that job and I was leaving for a month's vacation the next day -- but called for advice right after I got out of the shower. Unfortunately, all the medical personnel were unable to take my call. I tried to stay calm but worried all the way to work where I stopped to speak to our insurance representative (who was in her second pregnancy at the time). She advised me to stay calm, that spotting was normal in the first trimester, and to keep calling. After going round and round with my insurance and the doctors here, I was finally advised to go in to the ER and get checked out. I called and woke up my husband -- he had just gotten into bed after his 12 hour shift -- who immediately picked me up and work and took me over. I remember thinking about having a story to tell our family when we arrived at home and shared our happy news, thinking that we would all have a laugh about this soon.
It seemed like forever that we waited in first the ER lobby and then outside of the gynocologist's office. When we finally got taken back, the doctor asked some questions and then said he would try to do an ultrasound. He warned us that it was probably too early to see anything, though, so not to worry if that was the case. He was able to find the gestational sac -- it measured 11mm -- but there appeared to be nothing inside. He sent me down to the lab for some bloodwork, told me he would call by 4PM, and then I went back to work.
I nervously awaited a phone call but none came. 4PM came and went; I left work. When I arrived home, I noticed that I had a voicemail. The doctor stumbled through his words (English was not his first language), but all I heard was my hCG level -- 52 -- and that it likely meant I was starting to experience an early miscarriage. I immediately dissolved into tears. For some reason, all I could think about was the packing and chores that still had to be done before we left in the early morning for vacation. I shut my emotions off suddenly, busying myself until my husband got home and I told him the news. Sure enough, later that night I experienced bleeding significant enough that I knew I was miscarrying.
Instead of telling all of our friends and family back home that we were expecting, we had to tell them that we had been expecting but were no longer. Instead of spreading joy, we were spreading sadness. It was an experience that I wouldn't wish on anyone, but I know my husband and I are stronger because of it.
Our happy ending is this: on January 17th, exactly one month after I miscarried, I got a strong positive test! We were NTNP after the miscarriage...and apparently being on vacation was good for us. ;) I'm now 6 weeks along and feeling much more positive about this pregnancy than the last.