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Trying-to-Conceive Blog

cdarkchoc's blog

6DPO my dilemma

For those who have seen my previous blogs you will know i have had 6 miscarriages....i recently have been dtd to try improve my relationship as i have been on anti depressants for most of the year which turned me into a complete zombie with terrible mood swings and zero libido, after the last MC tore me apart.... 

 

To add to every thing my BF of 15 just left me. The thing is i have had 8 pregnancies altogether and only 1 surviving child who is now 10 out of those 8 as my first was lost at 22weeks due to weak cervix and my 10 yr old was saved with stitches. 6 MCs later post 10yr old and im realising we last dtd around ov time....so im on a TWW anxious about a BFP but no one to share it with which hurts.

 

Im trying to help myself i started pregnancy vits and i went to a holistic store and they recommended some pills to help possibly support my system which they think is too weak to hold a pregnancy. I will try anything but i am terrified and tested yesterday with a BFN, but it wasnt until I went into 101 different calculation sites i narrowed my OV to possibly 6days ago. So that possibly explains my BFN but i cant remember when my last BFPs were....i know they are usually earlier than the average especially if i DTD on OV day. 

 

According to calculations i have 31day cycle 11day luteal but lately its more like 13 i have always been irregular but after last MC i was dead on track according to my apps predictions for AF each month then it went pear shaped in the last 2 months. IDK i just need some hope.

 

Anyone else 6DPO? 

It's happened Again.....Number 6

I've miscarried again. Now I'm going to be investigated at the Recurring Miscarriages Unit because it's consistant in loses.  I feel so broken...mentally physically and emotionally.

Definately don't feel like a very good woman. I would have been 6wks3days today. I've not bled properly yet. Only spotting and old blood. But....my HCG level has Halved in less than 24hours and my progesterone level is almost 0.

We wanted this baby so bad. (Cries)

8th pregnancy, Incompetent CERVIX

I was  23weeks when I had an early labour first time which ended in a premmie death...noting that prior to that i was diagnosed as unable to conceive due to my Severe PCOS and later Endometriosis and Adenomyosis. In  having a routine scan the second time i became preg (immediately after 1st)it was at same point when it was all happening again , CERVIX was dilating and baby was heading south...i had an emergency cerclage to close it up and hold baby in and managed to get to 6days before due date(with my now 10year old). I've had a series of miscarriages in recent years since and I'm clutching at straws since this recent BFP, trying to  make it to my booking appointment in 3weeks time. I'm almost 6weeks and I've had alot of vaginal pressure...been leaking alot of watery discharge and feeling the odd twinges in the groin area but I've read alot of forums and this seems to be normal.

For people like me, it feels far from Normal, every niggle feels like a sign of things going wrong. My last miscarriage would have put me at this stage but I'm trying to be positive...every bathroom trip is a check. And aside from symptoms last week I feel nothing today so far apart from  a weird Lady regional sensation. Am I just being para? 

I know im incapable of carrying a baby on myown and will have a cerclage soon....but trying to hold out bothering ObGyns and GPs before that appointment is hard....I'm not trying to be a hypercondriac.

BFP...NOW MY CERVIX NEEDS HELP...AGAIN

So having waited until Monday like I was supposed to and tested again. I got my double positive. 

I can't help the angst in worrying as I have multiple hurdles to get over. 

I'm currently 5 +3 weeks and I'm praying I get to 8 and then to 12.

Because of my history my doctor doesn't want to internally scan me or examine me so as to not disturb this pregnancy due to my history of losses. I've been referred for my stitches to maintain the pregnancy and keep my cervix closed but I don't know when that will be.

So getting to that dating scan is feeling like forever and a day and I can't really relax until the suture is done and successful.

Not much symptoms apart from the odd night flushes and extra hungry in the morning. Oh and sleeping multiple times a day while on holiday from work. Not sure if that's due to work or sticky bean. 

I don't feel much different other than exhaustion.

I'm consciously eating healthier taking my pregnancy vitamins and taking the weight off my feet as much as possible. Not much else I can do to help. But...I am tempted to keep testing until my scan and until my surgery date to make sure ìm staying pregs

 

CD30, 9DPO FAINT BFP

Took a test today as ready trying to be calculated on working out my cycle since its so unpredictable but thanks to a few Web links I think I nailed it. And so I was at my local drugstore was thinking of buying sanitary towels and came out with a twin pack of a FR pregnancy test....bearing in mind I've been to the toilet 2 or 3times before I tested this morning.  But soon as I got home I test. Before 3mins were up I saw a faint line....looked kind of grey next to the bold line which confirms it works.  Then when the 3mins were up it had a pink tinge at the edges. And slight grey in the middle. Seems I am at the door of my Sticky bean. I prey it sticks  I will be good and take the next test on Monday.  According to calculations I'm 9dpo and on cycle day 30. My cycles are between 27 and 34 so quite irregular with a slight pattern. But pure based on the last cycle it is adding up nicely. 

Nail on the head, the wait is unbelievable

So after alot of research I've discovered my luteal phase doesn't change even if my cycle lengths are all over the shop....helps alot because after going through my history of cycles it adds up finally and I am 99% sure I DTD exactly on my OV day and a few days before but the wait is exhausting before I can test 

No AF.

So AF was due today....estimating I'm actually having another 31day cycle.....and I've been trying to hold off POAS but I decided to try one last time (especially as it was my last stick in the package.) It's the end of the day and it seems my hope of even a faint line is a hope too far from the reality. I've drawn another blank and feel disheartened. As I've had groin cramps and aching boobs all day and nothing has happened. I suppose if nothing happens by next Monday I may pay out for a digital test and see if that sheds light on this situation. 

 

The fact that I'm actively TTC makes me feel horrible that a missed AF could simply be just that.

LATE UPLOAD....POAS ADDICT

* this was yesterday, but TTW site was down* 

 

I've been TTC with my partner and we've been really trying to time the moments, anyway since DTD, I've been going through a pack on One Step Pregnancy strips like a tub of pringles. I bought a pack of 30 on Ebay, been using them for a few months but this current time I've probably gone through 15... so stressful. Some look like there's a line but majority are blank. I'm going out of my mind. AF due possibly tomorrow but I'm not 100% sure only because I'm irregular and my cycle can be from 28 -33 days due to my PCOS, Endometriosis and Adenomyosis but as I've tried my hardest to pin point my OV day which I think was either boxing day or the 28th but either way we DTD over that whole period, I'm confused. Anyone had this with One step? Should I use a regular brand? I've not bought Internet cheapest in the past but I thought I'd try this time as CBs and supermarket brands are costy when doing more that a few.

2 week stress

So here we are again 2 years later TTC, been a while trying to get over the last one. In fact I doubted I could even attempt this again given I still am suffering from the usual suspects in my life PCOS Adenomyosis and Endometriosis. 

I don't actually have 2weeks to wait now. I have 1 week. I dtd on a couple occasions over the Xmas period and possibly on the day before or exact day of my OV, which was 27/28 Dec.  I'm hoping I get a BFP. Waiting to do a test on the 7th but AF is due 9th. Even though I'm irregular there is a slight regularity on various months. 

I have had constipation, bloating and tingling in bb. Hunger for salty again. But given I'm only 6/7 dpo I'm thinking mind tricks are being played...

Could I be just having my usual monthly pms? I have had them before as I log everything since I miscarried 2years ago. I don't want my hopes up but my brain is working overtime 

 

Products of mc

I have an episode at work on Friday. Bleeding stopped a few days ago and the horrible brown discharge (tmi) stopped also, was happily working on Friday when I got a bit dizzy and week. I didn't know what was going on st all. I felt like I wanted to vomit and all my energy had been sucked out of me instantly along with feeling like my insides were stretching. I went to check myself in the toilet and notice what looked like little clear balls of jelly in my underwear (sorry tmi) looked like round raindrops or crystals (strange). I was set home and called my doctors. When they saw me they said I was experiencing what is called products of miscarriage stillll being expelled from the body and these bits of matter were hitting the nerve in the cervix which causes loss of energy or weakness, which woman normally experience during childbirth. I felt a bit worried and confused but since then, rested for a few days and now feel ok.

I am now 12days past the start of my miscarriage and am noticing what seems to be slight discharge, stretchy and cream coloured. Only a little, is that a sign of my first ov since pregnancy? My partner is anxious to get active again but I'm a bit worried because I've read online that you can get an infection if you do it too soon after miscarriage and he refuses to use protection since we have been together so long. Is it safe to do it. I want to ttc but we have to wait until ive been to gynae as they want to carry out tests since ive miscarried 3times already very early. Any advise ladies??

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