Stubborn Husband

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Stubborn Husband

Postby TaylorB » Wed Feb 25, 2015 12:51 pm

Hey All,
I am on round 5 of clomid (third round of 150 mg day 5-9). I am doing everything I can to get pregnant... clomid, weight loss, temp, opk, etc. Im getting really irritated though because even though my DH wants to get pregnant and is supportive of all we need to do to get pregnant (esp BD)... the only problem is he WILL NOT do the SA. My doctor ordered it 5 months ago and he just refuses. He is scared it will show he is infertile and dissappoint me. Any suggestions?

Oh and a little bit of background... I have a son from a previous marriage, he has no children. Therefore his concern with his fertility.

Thanks in advance!
BFP 5/22/2015 EDD 2/5/2016
MC 6/22/2015 - 7 Weeks 2 days No heartbeat
Ectopic Pregnancy implanted 4mm above c-sction scar. Gestational Sac attacted to scar. Chemotherapy to help miscarriage.
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby avaya » Wed Feb 25, 2015 2:58 pm

I'm sorry to hear that Taylor :(

I had my husband do his SA first because the tests men do are so minor compared to ours. It showed low morphology but I didn't realize how bad it was till yesterday when we finally moved on to an IUI and his postwash number was only 4 million. I saw a site that said that would only give us 2.5% chance. I definitely feel it is important men should get checked out too since most ppl seem to think an infertile couple means the woman has issues. All my tests have come back really good so we know it is male factor. I hope that's not the case for you but you'll definitely feel more relieved to have it done. I would suggest just telling your husband how you feel. You just want all testing to be done so the dr has all the answers they need. I think if you reassure him about having other options if his tests results come back poorly could ease him. I know some men are put on clomid for male factor though I can't remember what it is at this time. Good luck!!
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby Trying4#2 » Sat Feb 28, 2015 11:33 pm

Sorry you're dealing with this. My doctor wouldn't even run one test on me until my husband did a SA. My husband wasn't thrilled about it either (he's had to do it three times so far), but at the risk of sounding harsh...he needs to suck it up and just do it. Lol. We're all scared of these results, but if he's the problem, there are options. Maybe just explain how important it is in this process that he gets it done. Good luck!!
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby Tommie » Wed Mar 04, 2015 11:37 am

My husband went through the same thing. Just be kind and encouraging. It was humiliating to him the first time but when his count came back 5 million, they put him on clomid and Arimidex. 6 months later his count jumped to 22 million! We are continuing the meds until August but now we can go ahead and get me an HSG to check for blockages. If we aren't pregnant by August then we are scheduled to go to Dallas to see a fertility specialist. Contrary to belief, low sperm count can be corrected.
Married June 15, 2013,been TTC ever since. Recently began seeking fertility treatments. DH diagnosed with low sperm count.
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby Onestepcloser » Sat Mar 07, 2015 9:11 pm

@ TaylorB - Ok so I completely get how your husband feels.... BUT he is "using" you as an excuse not to get the test done... If he claims that he doesn't want to let you down if the results are bad then that falls on you and if it doesn't upset you then he has no reason not to. It's as simple as that. I don't mean to come off crazy/mean but this is your guys fertility we are talking about here and knowing is everything... not knowing does not change the results it just means your blind going through it and it will take a WHOLE lot longer if thats the path travelled. I wish you all the best and remind him that the test can be done at home then rushed off to lab in most places so see if thats an option for you guys. (Heck I'd probably even cash in birthday/christmas/anniversary gifts if he would just do it LOL) Prayers and Baby Dust to you guys. :D
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This is 2015

Me - 29, PCOS and type 2 diabetes
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Started TTC December 5,2006 we spent 2 years TTC naturally. nothing was happening so I got depressed and gained a whole bunch of weight. Spent 6 years working on living a healthy lifestyle, and thats where we are today.

First IUI medicated CD1 Feb 25th/2015- Femara 5mg/day CD3 - CD7 , Menopur injection CD6 150 iu. Follies only grew 3 - 5mm and lining was only 2.5mm so IUI canceled started progesterone March 9th/2015 (AF expected in 2 weeks)

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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby TaylorB » Mon Mar 23, 2015 7:08 am

Thanks for all the replys. Hubby and I talked and he promised that if we dont end up pregnant this month he will schedule the SA. I told him that we cant keep spending money on clomid and opks without knowing if he is ok to keep trying or if we need to change our plan of action. Baby dust to all!!!
BFP 5/22/2015 EDD 2/5/2016
MC 6/22/2015 - 7 Weeks 2 days No heartbeat
Ectopic Pregnancy implanted 4mm above c-sction scar. Gestational Sac attacted to scar. Chemotherapy to help miscarriage.
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby Ndonalds » Mon Mar 23, 2015 10:56 am

My hubby didn't want to do it either (he thought he couldn't perform under pressure). But I had to go through all sorts of invasive tests so I told him it was only fair. So he agreed. Although the doctor ended up saying we didn't need it anyway because I get prego, just miscarry. But it's a 2 person endeavor, not 1.
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4 CP's (Oct,Nov,Jan,April)
Unexplained so far, all RPL tests done
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BFP Oct 8th, 2015!!! EDD June 19-21, 2016
First try on Clomid 50mg worked despite ovulating on my own
IT'S A GIRL!
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Re: Stubborn Husband

Postby BeNearMeNow » Sun Apr 12, 2015 4:12 am

I really hope hubby rolled through on his promise. Mine was hesitant at first, too, and said he didn't think sperm was going to be a problem because he had conceived with his first wife. Yeah, like 8 years and 100 pounds ago!

Anyway, what convinced him was that I said I'd go too and "do all the work." We both really got a kick out of it. So...that's one strategy.
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