I can't stop feeling broken

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I can't stop feeling broken

Postby tavi1981 » Thu Feb 13, 2014 12:25 am

It's so stupid that at 10 dpo, a BFN just makes me feel like I'm broken and I know there's time... my AF isn't due til the 16th but I just don't feel pregnant... I feel pms'y and emotional and want to cry and scream. And I haven't even been trying that long but really, I just don't know what to do. And sometimes this board makes it harder with BFNs early when I'm just peeing money away, hoping to see a line. Every day I say I'm just going to wait til my AF shows or doesn't show but then I POAS and feel defeated all over again. It feels like it's normal to get BFPs super early and I'm full of lineless tests :(
Queer identified Mama to three children (12, 12, 6) and trying for my fourth!
Using a known donor and navigating those challenges.

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Re: I can't stop feeling broken

Postby DeeDee216 » Sat Feb 15, 2014 3:29 pm

Hi- I tested today... Bfn and I might be 12 or 13 dpo... So now I've been in bed all day... It's my birthday tomorrow and so far celebrating it the same as last year :( I hope you are well and I'm just so fed up with this depression I have that I can't seem to shake.

Thought you'd like to know youre heard. There's so much I should be doing and enjoying but I cry bc I can't.
Me: 29 DH: 28
TTC since December 2012
BFP 3/16/2014 same cycle after HSG
Due November 23, 2014

"When the world says give up... HOPE whispers, try ONE more time."
"Be truly glad there is wonderful joy ahead.

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Re: I can't stop feeling broken

Postby friend0405 » Sun Feb 16, 2014 4:39 pm

Today is the 2/16, and I hope you had a "Positive" outcome. I understand. Been trying for a long time, and it does make me feel broken when I get those BFN's, so I stopped testing until a missed period. I haven't yet had a missed period, but every month I keep getting busier with life during the waiting time, while taking my vitamins and being aware of the "just to be sure" types of behaviors. Now each month, though I still get totally disappointed, I don't feel like I lost so much of my emotional investment as I did when I over tested and obsessed online. (Though I still do obsess online;) My payers are out to you! Good luck!
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Re: I can't stop feeling broken

Postby jen920 » Sun Feb 16, 2014 8:31 pm

Tavi,

I understand. I've really gotten brokenhearted taking tests early. I just had to stop (easier said than done). Sometimes I've literally had to walk out of the bathroom. I wish sticky baby dust to you. stress can impact getting pregnant, so hopefully you can relax as much as possible (I'm telling myself as much as you :) ).

The 2ww is excruciating. I just try to keep busy and remember all that I do have. But it's hard!
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Re: I can't stop feeling broken

Postby SRedding » Mon Apr 14, 2014 8:54 pm

Tavi,
I know exactly how you feel. I am on my 18th cycle of trying to conceive number 1 and i obsessively test early. This last cycle i wasted five tests before getting AF. Then i spent two days in bed crying about it. This cycle i have made it a priority to not stress, enjoy life, and eat healthier. I had a revelation that infertility is one PART of my life, NOT my whole life. So when i start to obsess, i literally walk away from the computer, bed or put my phone down and head outside for run or grab a good book. I am trying so hard to not be depressed this month as i feel this is making my chances slimmer! Good luck to you all!
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Re: I can't stop feeling broken

Postby DeeDee216 » Mon Apr 14, 2014 9:04 pm

Hey guys- I posted awhile back... Since then I've seen the doc... DH was normal, Normal hormones, doc did an HSG and tubes clear but took more pressure to push the dye, and that cycle I got my BFP after 15 months... So please see a doc! I'm due in late November. Just wanted to let you know it happens!
Me: 29 DH: 28
TTC since December 2012
BFP 3/16/2014 same cycle after HSG
Due November 23, 2014

"When the world says give up... HOPE whispers, try ONE more time."
"Be truly glad there is wonderful joy ahead.

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