TTC before Terminal Mom Passes - Can we chat? :(

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TTC before Terminal Mom Passes - Can we chat? :(

Postby essiejames23 » Wed May 06, 2015 11:03 am

Hi girls! Its been a few months since I've been online because we took a break from TTC while I lost weight. I got a call last month from my mom who was rushed home with terminal cancer. She has about a year they think. Hubby and I are still in school, but working full time and can support a baby (tight, but possible). My immediate instincts were A. have a baby before mom dies - her one wish was for a grandchild B. We've talked about it for a long time already, TTC for 1 1/2 years with nothing C. I was diagnosed with PCOS last week, started met/spiro/lovenox and doctor said it will be very hard to get pregnant so start now but the meds may make it very easy

Logically it makes sense to start trying based on those factors, but its still pretty intimidating to think about. I always pictured myself being finished with school, in a house, everything together, but it doesnt seem like that will happen now. Is it wrong to hold off having children until my life is where I pictured it to be or is that unrealistic? By the time that happens it could be too late to get pregnant from PCOS, or maybe I'll just keep making excuses as to why to wait. We love children and I was thinking having our own family will give us all something positive to look forward to. :D
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Re: TTC before Terminal Mom Passes - Can we chat? :(

Postby casi7787 » Thu May 14, 2015 7:34 am

Prayers for you. I was kind of on that same boat. My stepmom was stage 2 of 4 liver disease from something she contracted working at a hospital. She wanted me to get married and have a baby before she passed, and it was progressing. She was starting to look very sick. We did just get married and are trying actively now. Where my story is different is that she received a treatment new and not widely known and has a 0 viral load and will be considered free and clear in 4 weeks as long as the viral load stays there. Nothing short of a miracle. She had her last wishes drawn up and was all ready to go and now I'm just at a loss for words really. So again, many prayers for your mother. I'm sad to hear that. The baby though is going to have to be your decision, if you don't you'll live with that forever, if you try and don't succeed at least you'll know you did your best, but if you do give her a grand baby you'll have that peace but she may not be around to help while you guys struggle due to rushing into it. Does she have anything to leave behind to help with that? I hope you can make a decision and be at peace with it.
DD-8/2006 & DS-6/2008 (mine from a previous relationship)
DS-3/1995 & DD 11/2000 (DH's non-biological children he helped raise in a previous relationship)
Have his DD some weekends
MC-1/2006 (DD's wombmate/s-natural multiple pregnancy)
MC-9/21/2013 4-5 weeks
TTC#3-since wedding-DH's 1st

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