Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

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Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby AndiA108 » Wed Jun 24, 2015 1:19 pm

Ok, I'm going to vent because I am literally in tears crying as I write this. I always feel silly asking for support or prayers when there are so many women out there who need them more than me. But at the risk of sounding selfish here goes nothing...

So we've been TTC since Novemeber. I had an early miscarriage in January... also known as a chemical pregnancy. Just started feeling down about not conceiving yet. I was talking with my sister and she recommend I go talk to a doctor.

MY APPT. WAS AWFUL! I feel WORSE. The worst part of it all is I was finally at a place that I felt calm about everything. Now I'm a complete messs I wish I didn't go. I can't stop crying. I feel so alone now. There is no one I can talk to.

So first, my doctor had to go into delivery so I got stuck with a random doctor that acted like I was a waste of her time. She basically told me I had no reason to be there. I told her my concerns... endometriosis, spotting before my period ... low progesterone... etc. And she had nothing to say about it! Basically, come back at 12 months. She phrased "so why are you here?" so rudely. I can't even explain properly how it felt. I told her my concern about not having cm and should I use Preseed and her advice was to "just not stress". THE WORST ADVICE anyone can give to me right now. I was not stressing about this and nothing happened.

When I asked if she knew I had a chemical pregnancy. She said "what's that?" Then told me, "That's an early miscarriage." Yes, I know but doesn't everyone refer to them as a chemical pregnancy??

I have had bad pain on my left side, which has happened before and it was a cyst. She wants to get another ultra sound to look at that. But at this point I just want to give up on everything completely. I don't feel like having another ultra sound to tell me I have yet another cyst. There's nothing they will do for it anyways.

Anyways, I know it's selfish but I am just feeling soooo down and sad. Any positive vibes, prayers, good thoughts sent my way would be more than appreciated. :cry: :cry: :cry: I need to get my zen back! I don't know how to calm down right now!
ME: 29, DH: 31
TTC #1 since November 2014

01/2014 - MC 6wks
12/2015 - MC 5wks
2 Rounds Clomid 50mg - BFN
(NTNP Feb 2016 - April 2016)
09/2016 - Round 3 Clomid 50mg + 200mg CoQ10 3xs Day
10/2016 - Clomid Challenge Test 100mg - Responded well
11/2016 - Clomid 100mg - BFP 12/03/2016 -- Ended in a miscarriage: 12/22/2016

3 months after our miscarriage... 03/22/2017 - Unexpected BFP. Praying this is our rainbow baby.
04/11/2017 - 6w5d saw the heartbeat!
04/19/2017 - 8w5d heartbeat still strong @ 178 :D
06/28/2017 - It's a boy! <3

11/18/2017 - Our hearts will forever be changed. Our baby boy was born in to the hands of God at 39 weeks and 1 day due to a true knot in his cord. Truly heart broken.
AndiA108
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Re: Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby Danaa » Wed Jun 24, 2015 1:35 pm

I'm really sorry ur feeling bad,some doctors are plain rude,I suggest seeing onother doctor that is more warm and understanding!I have been trough all of that and I can understand all of ur feelings,all I can say is going to get better in time and then worse,I wish you don't get there,I send you all the positive vibes I can!!!Ttc is awful!!!Hopefuly you get pregnant soon and you don't have to go trough all of this!!!Hugs!!!
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My Ovulation Chart
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Me 29
DH 31
After 3 years in which we tried everything we are doing IVF in Greece with Iakentro Athens.
Short Protocol with Bemfola and Cetrotide
19mature eggs and we have 9 day5 blasto.
FET#1 ended in a very early loss,chemical pregnancy.
FET#2 ended in a loss at 22w due to IC,my boys will be forever in my heart .
FET#3 MMC at the 10 weeks ultrasound.
FET#4 2018
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Re: Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby wakasa_78 » Wed Jun 24, 2015 11:06 pm

Oh, Andi, I'm so sorry you had to go through that! *hugs*

The doctor was out of line, and I think you should take some kind of action, maybe talk to your regular doctor about it? Do you have any chance of seeing a reproductive endocrinologist? Maybe they can help?

Telling someone TTC to take it easy and not stress is the worst advice you could give, gosh! That makes me mad!

Don't give up, hang in there! You will get that BFP!
DH is 38, has no known fertility issues
I am 38, have PCO, dermoid cysts, very little ovarian matter left
IUD removed in April, 2015 - TTC#1 since May, 2015
:bfp: on September 3, 2015 @ 13 DPO, EDD May 13, 2016
Baby BOY born on May 14, 2016
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Re: Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby AndiA108 » Thu Jun 25, 2015 3:52 pm

Thanks ladies! It helps to know I've been validated in this. Just hearing your support has helped me soo much! I really appreciate it!
ME: 29, DH: 31
TTC #1 since November 2014

01/2014 - MC 6wks
12/2015 - MC 5wks
2 Rounds Clomid 50mg - BFN
(NTNP Feb 2016 - April 2016)
09/2016 - Round 3 Clomid 50mg + 200mg CoQ10 3xs Day
10/2016 - Clomid Challenge Test 100mg - Responded well
11/2016 - Clomid 100mg - BFP 12/03/2016 -- Ended in a miscarriage: 12/22/2016

3 months after our miscarriage... 03/22/2017 - Unexpected BFP. Praying this is our rainbow baby.
04/11/2017 - 6w5d saw the heartbeat!
04/19/2017 - 8w5d heartbeat still strong @ 178 :D
06/28/2017 - It's a boy! <3

11/18/2017 - Our hearts will forever be changed. Our baby boy was born in to the hands of God at 39 weeks and 1 day due to a true knot in his cord. Truly heart broken.
AndiA108
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 1079
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2015 7:08 am

Re: Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby ttctwins » Sat Jun 27, 2015 2:42 pm

What a dreadful experience. I feel for you. Definitely be sure not to get that particular doc again. She sounds unprofessional, unknowledgeable, and lacks all manners. I hope you get your BFP soon. We're here for you. Fx and GL

:babydustb: :babydustg:
Me: 37 DH: 34
TTC#1 since jan 2015

july 2015: DH SA #1: 3% morphology
sep 2015: DH SA #2: 1% morphology
nov 2015: IUI #1: + pergotime (clomid) 100mg cd3-7, ovitrelle - bfn
dec 2015: IUI #2: + pergotime 100mg cd3-7, ovitrelle - :angel: 4+4
feb 2016: IUI #3: + pergotime; gonal-f & orgalutran cd8; ovitrelle - bfn
mar 2016: IUI #4: + gonal-f 50 iu cd3-7, ovitrelle - bfp

http://ttcscientific.blogspot.dk

http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/5777f5
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Re: Feelig so alone! Need Some Cyber Support.

Postby inthemetro » Sun Jun 28, 2015 11:00 am

Ugh, I'm so sorry you went through that. How awful. Your instincts were totally right to go seek medical help before a year--for those of us with potential fertility issues, going ASAP is the best thing to do. (I went to a doctor after six months, and we talked about tests and plans of action right away.) You deserve a doctor who takes you seriously! Good luck.
30 years old, TTC #1

PCOS, blood disorder
mc (March 2015)
7 cycles of clomid: bfn
first cycle injectables: bfp!

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