Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

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Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby GabrielaH » Sun Mar 25, 2018 5:03 pm

I would like to ask for help for my friend, Andra. After 6 failed IVF cycles, she lost hope completely. Now she's actually on the 7th cycle, but had a bleeding today, 6 days after the transfer.
She hit rock bottom, she sounded so despaired and I'm afraid for her. She feels cursed, emptied and unworthy to be a mother. I don't know what to tell her anymore, so I'm asking for your advice. It will be great if you, as women capable to understand the hell she's going through, would write a few words for her. I will send them to her and maybe this will lift her spirit a little bit. Thank you in advance, this is highly appreciated!
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Danaa » Mon Mar 26, 2018 1:41 pm

Is she bleeding heavily or just spotting?
Image
My Ovulation Chart
.
Me 29
DH 31
After 3 years in which we tried everything we are doing IVF in Greece with Iakentro Athens.
Short Protocol with Bemfola and Cetrotide
19mature eggs and we have 9 day5 blasto.
FET#1 ended in a very early loss,chemical pregnancy.
FET#2 ended in a loss at 22w due to IC,my boys will be forever in my heart .
FET#3 MMC at the 10 weeks ultrasound.
FET#4 2018
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Hopefulrosey » Mon Mar 26, 2018 3:10 pm

Gabriela, my heart breaks for your friend. I recently had a failed ivf (first attempt) and it was tough. I cannot even begin to imagine her pain after 6 failed ivf (let's hope this 7th will work out).

Not sure if your friend is religious but you can tell her I will pray for her that God gives her the strength to handle this difficult time and give her the baby she deserves. She will be in my thoughts
TTC#1 since Feb 2016
Me: Rosey, 33, mild endo
DH: 32, 4 SAs. varies between normal to MFI :doh:
IUI #1 Sep'17 - BFN and ended up with 2x 20mm+ cysts
IUI #2 Nov'17 - cancelled. O'd spontaneously on CD10 before trigger
IUI #3 Dec'17 BFN... moving on to IVF in 2018
IVF #1 - ER (16 follies,14 eggs, 7 mature, 3 fertilised), 3d transfer of 3 embies (only 1x 8 cell, 2x 4 cell), no frosties, BFN
Lap Mar'18 - Dx mild endo
IVF #2 - Jul'18 - ER (10 eggs, 5 mature, 5 fertilised), 5d transfer of 2 expanding blasts, 1x frozen, BFN

Aug'18 - Nautural BFP while waiting for FET :D Beta #1 968, Beta #2 12000+, HB: 168

Oct'18 - Officially in 2nd trimester. Can't thank God enough for his blessings
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Hopefulrosey » Mon Mar 26, 2018 3:16 pm

You should also tell her that not being able to get pregnant doesn't mean that she's cursed or unworthy to be a mother. Maybe she's been chosen for something bigger. Something more nobel that not everyone is capable of doing. Has she thought about adoption and giving a child home who is already in this world and looking for a parent?
TTC#1 since Feb 2016
Me: Rosey, 33, mild endo
DH: 32, 4 SAs. varies between normal to MFI :doh:
IUI #1 Sep'17 - BFN and ended up with 2x 20mm+ cysts
IUI #2 Nov'17 - cancelled. O'd spontaneously on CD10 before trigger
IUI #3 Dec'17 BFN... moving on to IVF in 2018
IVF #1 - ER (16 follies,14 eggs, 7 mature, 3 fertilised), 3d transfer of 3 embies (only 1x 8 cell, 2x 4 cell), no frosties, BFN
Lap Mar'18 - Dx mild endo
IVF #2 - Jul'18 - ER (10 eggs, 5 mature, 5 fertilised), 5d transfer of 2 expanding blasts, 1x frozen, BFN

Aug'18 - Nautural BFP while waiting for FET :D Beta #1 968, Beta #2 12000+, HB: 168

Oct'18 - Officially in 2nd trimester. Can't thank God enough for his blessings
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Amy4678 » Sat Apr 21, 2018 10:25 am

Whoa, 7 cycles are a lot. I think you should tell her to reconsider it. So many failed cycles can depress her. I think she should change her clinic. If that doesn't help, then consider another method. Some methods are just not right for some bodies. Surrogacy helps in most cases.
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Emilykingston » Mon Apr 23, 2018 8:13 am

I dont know what to say to her. She is a brave woman. She took so much pain. She is extraordinary.Tell her that. She is a wonderful woman. No normal woman can bear so much pain with so much strength. I will pray for her. May the odds be in her favor. Loads of love to her.
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Mum2T » Fri Jun 29, 2018 6:24 am

I’m sitting on the train right now on the way home from a work night out crying my heart out because I just got my period. I really thought it was my month because of all the “symptoms” but it seems not. A stranger just asked me am I okay because the tears just won’t stop flowing. The one thing I can be thankful for is that I get to go home to a loving husband who’ll put his arms around me tonight and tell me it will be okay.
There’s women out there who have more but there’s definitely women out there who’s have less. Big hugs to your friend x
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Amanda321 » Fri Jun 29, 2018 12:39 pm

Gabriela H hi! Feeling so sorry for your friend. I will pray for her. but dear I think you should prove your friendship now. You can get any type of help from us at any time. you should muster up her courage that nothing is impossible in this world. And I hope you will get a lot. but to get it you shouldn’t lose hope. hope is very necessary for you in this situation. You should listen her successful stories of ladies. try to avoid her from terrible stories. I think its very tough journey. But after this journey you will be very happy. and then you will feel that it’s the beginning of your new life. so be brave. Good luck dude.
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby cindywoolfe » Mon Aug 20, 2018 4:36 am

Oh, my! Seven cycles are a lot! Just tell her that she's brave enough! She came til, here. She shouldn't be giving up now. I really hope it happens for her. She must have been through hell. Good luck to her! I'll definitely make sure to pray for her.
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Janeen1 » Wed Aug 22, 2018 5:50 am

Hello, there. I hope you're doing alright. Seven cycles seem like a lot. It must have been really hard for your friend. You're doing a great job as a friend. Good luck to her. I'm sure things will get better for her!
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Perrie » Wed Aug 22, 2018 9:59 am

Hey, there! I hope she's doing well, now. Seven cycles, wow! That's a lot. It only shows how courageous she is, you know? It must have been so hard for her. This is a really tough situation, you know. Choosing to go for assisted conception is brave. But, getting up after six attempts is even braver! I'm really proud of her. She'll get rewarded for this. I'm absolutely certain. Good luck to her. My prayers are with her. I genuinely hope this works for her. P.S if she needs an expert opinion on her situation, she should be there for the event being hosted by BioTexCom. They will definitely help her out. They are yet to announce the dates and the venue, but PM me for more details.
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby Mandy7 » Thu Aug 23, 2018 8:18 am

Hey, there. How are you? I hope you're doing okay. I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. That's a lot of IVF cycles, wow. I'm really surprised to see she went for it. This is so great to see. Thank you for sharing her story. She's honestly an inspiration. It's beautiful to see her spirit. She hasn't given up. And, she shouldn't! My prayers are with her. I hope it works for her. Good luck and good day to both of you!
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby hannahdavid » Sun Sep 30, 2018 10:08 am

I feel so bad for your friend. It's so hard to deal with so many failed cycles. I can relate to her on this. I too at some point got hopeless. However, tell your friend to not lose hope. Just make sure she is surrounded by positivity. I hope she is soon able to conceive. Sending baby dust her way.
-Low AMH and High FSH
-Poor Ovarian Reserve
-5 IUIs (failed)
-1 IVF (failed)
Life is a total mess
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Re: Advices for a despaired friend, on the 7th IVF cycle

Postby mimimama » Wed Oct 17, 2018 8:11 am

I am sorry to know your friend's story. I would definitely recommend changing a clinic. The further treatment mainly depends on what are the reasons of failed IVF-s. If she cannot conceive cos of eggs quality, then she might consider undergoing IVF with donor eggs. If implantation is the issue, then I would advise to discuss IVF PGS NGS with her doc. All the best to your friend.
Me 31, DH 40. TTC 5 years. Unexplained infertility.
December 2015- IVF #1 BFN
May/June 2016- new doctor, IVF consultation in Gdansk Poland
October 2016- IVF #2 Invicta BFP!!!
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