New here-still sad

Are you ready to start trying again after a loss? Ask questions or find buddies here.

Moderators: JessM, southernbelle, maddy, unaffected

New here-still sad

Postby Taters » Mon Jul 18, 2011 6:43 pm

I am new here. TTC 2 months after a missed m/c at 10 weeks in April '11. U/S showed no heartbeat. Just had another BFN this morning and then a notification that yet another of my friends had a baby. Every time I get a BFN it is like I am losing the baby all over again. I still feel so sad about my baby and my DH seems to be completely over it.
User avatar
Posts: 12
Joined: Mon Jul 18, 2011 12:00 am

Postby WifeOfAl » Mon Jul 18, 2011 9:05 pm

Hi Taters.....first off, let me send you a virtual hug. **hug** Because I understand. I have learned from my own experience that we all heal differently. I thought my husband was over losing Alex too, but it turned out that his way of dealing with it was HIS way. And when I asked him why it seemed that he was "over it" he replied that he needed to be strong for me. I assumed he was ok when all along he was hurting just as much as I was. Things are not always what they appear--men can hurt too.
Secondly, I have found that my faith in God has helped me TREMENDOUSLY. I thought the pain would never end, and it did take some time but now I am in a better place. I felt JUST like you..."I'm not supposed to be POASing right now...I'm supposed to be holding my son, not a peestick!" So trust me....I understand.
Lastly, remember that your BFNs do NOT represent your baby, because you are not TTC your other are TTC A NEW CHILD, and NOT to replace your other baby but to be a new addition to your life. My prayers are with you and the rest of us on our new journeys! So keep your head up, Taters, and take every day one day at a time!
God is GREAT...ALL the time! I thank Him for my new beginning!

Me (Maya)-38
DH (Al) --42
:angel: Alexander "Alex" Richard-born into Heaven on 11/11/10 @17 weeks. We miss our angel!!!

<a href="">
<img border="0" src=""></a>

My Ovulation Chart
User avatar
TTC Princess
TTC Princess
Posts: 188
Joined: Tue May 11, 2010 12:00 am
Location: Indiana


Postby Tanise77 » Thu Jul 21, 2011 1:15 am

I lost imine in May and we are trying again now as well. I felt just like you both in at first felt alone in morning our loss, but was pleasantly surprised by the same answer WifeOfAl was given by her DH! I do feel that I still have mourned more over this than he feels I need to, but I think that's his way of loving me and not wanting me to hurt anymore. What a great DH to through his own pain for our loss. be more worried about me! My family is busting at the seems in babies as wells as some of my friends! It's hard, but some of them have struggled as much or more than me, so I try and focus on their happiness. Most of all, you are not alone Taters! We'll all get through this together with thanks to this website!
Posts: 131
Joined: Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:00 am

Postby Shannon88 » Sun Jul 24, 2011 3:59 pm

I also completely understand where you are coming from. We lost our daughter at birth. After burying her, we took a 6 month break and then tried consecutively for the next 18 months, during which we suffered 4 MCs. I know what it feels like to have your hopes up month after month after month. My best advice is to trust your body, don't pay any attention to anyone else getting pregnant, and don't ever give up. It will happen, you just need to believe in yourself!
~ Shannon
Proud Sub Wife to Eric ~ 05/28/05
Proud Mommy to: Jeremy Ryan ~ born safely 08/03/07
Savannah Grace ~ born into Heaven 05/18/09 at 40 weeks, 3 days
Angel 1 ~ MC 12/01/09 at 6 weeks
Angel 2 ~ MC 01/05/10 at 5 weeks
Angel 3 ~ MC 05/05/10 at 7 weeks
Angel 4 ~ MC 01/05/11 at 4 weeks
Proud Mommy to: Irelynn Elizabeth ~ born safely (just barely) 01/03/12

**Beginning Follistem injections (with timed intercourse) 4/28/2011, trigger 5/4, :bfp: 5/22, Beta HcG 699, Prog 32.4! 5/31 Beta HcG 16,120, Ultrasound 6/1 ~ 1 Baby Bean with a heartbeat! Ultrasound 6/8 Everything good! EDD 1/22/12 ~ Emergency C-section 1/3/12 Healthy Baby Girl born ALIVE!!
User avatar
Posts: 52
Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2010 12:00 am
Location: Gloucester, VA

Postby nadeneden » Tue Sep 27, 2011 5:32 am

I am so sorry for all of your loses... i just had a m/c 4 days ago and i am in so much pain it feels like i am not coping with my lose... i know how you all feel,but in the end of the day the Lord will show us the way to go foward with our life's. TTC journey can be very emotional not just for us but for our hubbies 2..

God's blessing on all of you.....
User avatar
Posts: 1
Joined: Wed Dec 02, 2009 1:00 am

Return to TTC After a Loss