Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

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Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

Postby Deeall » Wed Sep 25, 2013 11:50 pm

HI

I am new to this forum and new to forums in general but I have read that it can be a good tip in helping with the stress of TTC!

My history; Well I started "trying " properly in Jan of 2013. I always had messed up cycles even on the pill so after stopping in Sept 2012 it took sometime to get back to a "normal" cycle and I took some primolut-N to Restart my cyle. I conceieved first go but then miscarried at 5 weeks. A few weeks later amazingly I was pregnant again but at my 8 week scan there was nothing so I had to have a D&C. At this stage I was a wreck so I took two months off for emtional rest. Even though there is no such thing as emtional rest for me these days.

We started TTC again in August no joy first cycle and a 40 day cycle! This month I ovulated on CD 21 and am now CD 34 with no period but a BFN and I have a feeling this month I am out.

The issue is this OBSESSION... I think about it all day every day... I feel like I have no rest from this .. I am just so sick of myself. I am so jealous of other people with their babies and bumps and I feel bad about this. I just feel cheated with my two loses and worried that I will never carry.

Is this normal.....? I feel like I have lost myself and dont know how to get it back. People say ohh you wont concieve when you are obsessing about it and just relax.. How do I relax.. I dont think I know how to do this.

Does anyone else feel this way.. I need to know I am just some crazy woman!!!!! How can we beat this.

Any comment would be welcome

D
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Re: Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

Postby kclough09 » Thu Sep 26, 2013 1:02 pm

I often feel the same way. It's hard not to think about it, especially when people say don't stress about it just let it happen! Do you have any other children or are you TTC your first? Distraction, distraction, distraction...I think that is the best thing. Try to find something else to focus on. I'm trying some new recipes this week and am tackling a major clean/organization project in my house. I do realize it's hard though! Best of luck to you!
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Re: Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

Postby Deeall » Fri Sep 27, 2013 12:50 am

Hi

Thanks for your reply. No this will be our first child if we concieve. I am 31 and my husband is 40 ..so my doctor keeps telling me I have time I am young.. but this is still to hard.

Do you have children ?

I am trying this distraction thing but I still spend my time thinking while doing the things. Its hard to get inside my head to say calm down !! My husband suggested I consider some counselling as maybe talking to someone professional will help but I am not convinced.

My doc started me on vitex a little over a month ago as I have odd cycles...she said it can take a few months to really take effect so I need to patient. Just frustrating when you know when you ovulate so you have sex but still nothing ! But this seems to be the way.

All the best
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Re: Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

Postby 9113212 » Fri Sep 27, 2013 7:36 pm

After 2 miscarriages, it might be a good idea to see an fertility specialist. It might be a problem that is totally correctable such as a clotting disorder, or your uterine lining is not thick enough. Your regular obgyn doesn't really know to look for these things. I've had a miscarriage and don't fall into that category [yet], but I know if I had a second one, I would for sure see a specialist. Hope you find the answers you need. :hugs:
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Re: Trying to get my sanity back..sharing might help!!

Postby Deeall » Sun Sep 29, 2013 11:42 pm

Hi

I have been told repeatedly that two is not an issue is considered totally normal! Hard to accept but this is the message. Also because my m/c`s were different in nature they think there is no issue. I had a full cycle monitored with my obgyn.. bloods on Day 3 and scans throughout the cycle. I developed normal uterine lining ( a little thin but enough for implantation) and then also developed nice normal follicles for ovulation so they say all is ok !!! I am on aspirin in case I have a clotting disorder as it wont hurt the..
So I think my head and my over thinking is going to be a possible issue with this task of conceiving. Hopefully I will be third time lucky and it is as they say normal to lose two!

:luck:
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