Additional stab to the heart

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Additional stab to the heart

Postby Lea_me » Fri Apr 10, 2015 1:08 pm

We've been ttc for 14 months. Additionally to the ever growing questionmark of "why", why is it not happening for us?... I am slowly becoming aware of another cruel joke that is in store for me and I believe maybe some other women feel the same about it.
- out of consideration towards my feelings, my best friend is not sharing with me her pregnancy news early on.

We are very close but now its obvious she is pregnant but won't tell me. Because of my struggles to conceive I feel like I have become off limits regarding anything baby realated.
The experience of unsucessfully ttc has brandmarked me. I've lost my bonding qualities in the eyes of my friend, because -you know - how dare harm me with such happy news, it would be unfair.
I feel very left out. I feel cheated by the universe that lets me miss out on my friends pregnancy which - under other circumstances - she would have been thrilled to share with me.
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Joined: Fri Apr 10, 2015 12:35 pm

Re: Additional stab to the heart

Postby Nick02 » Sat Apr 11, 2015 8:25 am

I would be hurt if I were you too. Your feelings are normal. I would try and look at it in a different way though. She cares about you so much, she doesn't want to hurt you. If you are COMPLETELY certain she is pregnant ask her. When she gives you her good news be enthusiastically happy for her, ask questions (when is she due, how is she feeling, baby shower plans, gender preferences, etc), and tell her you want to be there for her or how excited you are to be an auntie (even though not blood my bff will be an auntie). Once she knows you are genuinely happy for her and that she didn't hurt you with news of the baby, hopefully things will go back to normal. Then if your feelings are still hurt long after the baby is born (when she isn't as hormonal) talk to her about the situation. I'm sure she wasn't trying to hurt you intentionally or maybe she didn't know how to handle it. Good luck!!!
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