What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

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What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Fri Dec 20, 2013 7:56 am

We've all heard something! Could have been some insensitive "advice", an annoying comment, maybe a passive aggressive statement from the MIL...
Let's get real, we all know the mechanics of how to make a baby. That isn't the hard part! It's the emotional roller coaster that we ride on every month. Some people can be so insensitive, some may try to give you a shoulder to lean on but end up saying all the wrong things (even if it isn't on purpose!), only to make you feel worse!

Let's pass some time! What's something that someone has said to you that totally gets under your skin???

My personal favorite: "just relax and it'll happen". So if I go take a bubble bath and my husband rubs my feet I'll get pregnant!?
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby loving_ladie » Fri Dec 20, 2013 8:41 am

Boo! Thats not helpful..some times it's body chemistry..not relaxing! Mine is, "You know..itll be okay if it doesn't happen"...ha..really..because Im 23 & need a full hyst asap..but its "ok"..not too mention $$/each iui etc grr...makes me very grumpy!
Me- 23severe endo. Docs think it's in bowel & bladder & warned I could end up with colostomy and or urostomy if a full hyst is not done asap.
10/2012 Lap Endo dx
07/2013 Have a baby or hyst-figure it out doc says
11/2013 hsg all good
08/2013 200mg levothyroxine, 500mg metformin 2*day, Necon obc
IUI-100mg clomid, estradiol #1Jan 6,2014
1/23/14 -BFN
9/20/2014 IUI #2 100mg clomid, hcg trigger shot, progesterone supps- Doc cancelled IUI and decided to try timed intercourse
10/4/14-BFN
Married 11/1/14
Lap for endo removal-11/28/14
BFP!!!-12/3/14-VERY SCARY 1ST TRI D/T surgery
U/S once a week, then moved to every 2 weeks
2/2/15-Baby looks great! Measuring ahead by 7 days. Doc moved EDD t 08/10/15

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tryingtobepatient1 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 6:47 am

'oh you've only been trying for 6 months' makes me want to punch people LOL I don't think it matters how long you've been trying each month with a bfn is terrible.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 7:04 am

I know!! People are so insensitive!! It drives me crazy. It's even worse when it comes from someone who accidentally got pregnant or who got pregnant on the first try. It's like.. You don't even know what you're talking don't try to tell me what I'm doing wrong!
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tryingtobepatient1 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 7:57 am

Exactly haha. And there is this or person named anonymous on here (there are a few) that comments on everyones posts so rudely! Things like you don't deserve a baby cos your not married,your to young, too old, a year isn't a long time. They are just blatently rude on so many posts.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 9:56 am

Ugh! People like that should be blocked from the site. Only positive baby vibes here!
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tulip123 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 5:57 pm

The worst one "How come you decided not to have kids?" . I was stunned when I was asked that Q. Maybe she didn't mean it that way. But I was stunned. We had not even started trying then - just about to start I guess. I decided to ignore it.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 6:30 pm

Wow, that's absolutely awful tulip! People don't realize, You should never ask someone if they are pregnant, when they are going to have children or why they aren't having any! You never know someone's situation.
That was nice of you to ignore them! I don't know what I would have done!
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tulip123 » Thu Dec 26, 2013 8:15 pm

Ah. It was irritating. I hardly know her (inspite of that she had the nerves to ask me such a Q!), so didn't bother to get myself upset over what she said.
You are right. I just talk to people about everything except the topic of TTC. Never ask them about it. Thats a very touchy subject.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby loving_ladie » Thu Dec 26, 2013 11:31 pm

Sorry tulip. That is so not polite!!
Ha.. Yeah or the why do ypu want kids?? You can have mine any day!
...that makes me crazy!
Me- 23severe endo. Docs think it's in bowel & bladder & warned I could end up with colostomy and or urostomy if a full hyst is not done asap.
10/2012 Lap Endo dx
07/2013 Have a baby or hyst-figure it out doc says
11/2013 hsg all good
08/2013 200mg levothyroxine, 500mg metformin 2*day, Necon obc
IUI-100mg clomid, estradiol #1Jan 6,2014
1/23/14 -BFN
9/20/2014 IUI #2 100mg clomid, hcg trigger shot, progesterone supps- Doc cancelled IUI and decided to try timed intercourse
10/4/14-BFN
Married 11/1/14
Lap for endo removal-11/28/14
BFP!!!-12/3/14-VERY SCARY 1ST TRI D/T surgery
U/S once a week, then moved to every 2 weeks
2/2/15-Baby looks great! Measuring ahead by 7 days. Doc moved EDD t 08/10/15

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Fri Dec 27, 2013 6:05 am

Babysitting is NOT the same as being a parent!!
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tryingtobepatient1 » Fri Dec 27, 2013 6:22 am

Exactly, I want my own baby to cuddle :)
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby loving_ladie » Fri Dec 27, 2013 10:43 am

Agreed! & when people say that..at least when my friends say that, the don't seem to be appreciative of their kids. And that breaks my heart. And makes me a wee bit jealous...
Me- 23severe endo. Docs think it's in bowel & bladder & warned I could end up with colostomy and or urostomy if a full hyst is not done asap.
10/2012 Lap Endo dx
07/2013 Have a baby or hyst-figure it out doc says
11/2013 hsg all good
08/2013 200mg levothyroxine, 500mg metformin 2*day, Necon obc
IUI-100mg clomid, estradiol #1Jan 6,2014
1/23/14 -BFN
9/20/2014 IUI #2 100mg clomid, hcg trigger shot, progesterone supps- Doc cancelled IUI and decided to try timed intercourse
10/4/14-BFN
Married 11/1/14
Lap for endo removal-11/28/14
BFP!!!-12/3/14-VERY SCARY 1ST TRI D/T surgery
U/S once a week, then moved to every 2 weeks
2/2/15-Baby looks great! Measuring ahead by 7 days. Doc moved EDD t 08/10/15

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tryingtobepatient1 » Fri Dec 27, 2013 10:34 pm

Yep they should think themselves lucky!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby LexiBaby » Thu Jan 02, 2014 10:26 pm

" If it is meant to be it will happen " OH and this one "Relax and have fun" That one isn't rude it just irritates me because I want it so bad.
Me: 20
DH:23
Fur baby: Autumn
1/14- Diagnosed with PCOS
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