What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Meet others who are TTC in their 20s

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby HNR » Sun Jan 05, 2014 10:17 pm

Oh this is exactly what I needed!!! venting can be so therapeutic :) I have a lot of friends who are ttc so it's been nice to have the understanding group... however some people are terrible! I don't think they mean to be ***holes but their comments hurt. I hate when pregnant women complain about being pregnant!!! and call me (ttc 15 mos/ endo/ lap surgery, etc) to complain about not feeling good and regretting their accidental pregnancy!! Boohoo
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby SouthernBelle_87 » Mon Jan 06, 2014 6:14 am

I have a new one that probably tops anything I've heard. It was a Facebook update from someone I went to high school with, (she's pregnant with her 2nd) who I should probably defriend.. She said "You get pregnant and people get so jealous.. Grow up!"
Really!?
Me(27) DH(27)
TTC#1 Since July 2013
4/2014: DX PCOS
5/2014: DH's SA shows high count, motility, and morphology!

6/16/14: Cycle 1 Femara+Pregnyl trigger shot... :bfp: on 7/13!!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby Ladyfin » Mon Jan 06, 2014 11:30 am

I'm so glad for this post. I hate hearing things like "Why don't you have kids?" because there is no way to respond to that without letting someone know the struggle you're going through. I want so badly to punch them or say something like "Clearly you got pregnant by accident."
I'm about to get my TTC 2 year badge and ignorant comments like that still hurt. I am very grateful for places like this where I can connect with people going through the same thing. It makes the TTW a little more tolerable.
Best of luck to all, I hope we all get the hell out of the TTC boards soon!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby loving_ladie » Tue Jan 07, 2014 9:20 am

Best one I got last night..they sent know that I had my iui yesterday and only know that Im ttc just not the depth.."I don't know why you want a baby so bad! God has blessed you. God LOVES you!! God HATES me for giving me the two he did " ARE YOU KIDDING ME!! your kids turned out less than amazing because of how you raised them!! You let them get away with talking back and treating you poorly then you lwt your husband beat thwm. Of COURSE the have issues and are rude to you!! Do not equivalate my to very kids with yours!!! Hrmph ..thanks ladies...needed the vent.
people sommetimes baffle me!!
Me- 23severe endo. Docs think it's in bowel & bladder & warned I could end up with colostomy and or urostomy if a full hyst is not done asap.
10/2012 Lap Endo dx
07/2013 Have a baby or hyst-figure it out doc says
11/2013 hsg all good
08/2013 200mg levothyroxine, 500mg metformin 2*day, Necon obc
IUI-100mg clomid, estradiol #1Jan 6,2014
1/23/14 -BFN
9/20/2014 IUI #2 100mg clomid, hcg trigger shot, progesterone supps- Doc cancelled IUI and decided to try timed intercourse
10/4/14-BFN
Married 11/1/14
Lap for endo removal-11/28/14
BFP!!!-12/3/14-VERY SCARY 1ST TRI D/T surgery
U/S once a week, then moved to every 2 weeks
2/2/15-Baby looks great! Measuring ahead by 7 days. Doc moved EDD t 08/10/15

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby loving_ladie » Tue Jan 07, 2014 9:33 am

Duplicate deleted
Last edited by loving_ladie on Mon Jan 13, 2014 11:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
Me- 23severe endo. Docs think it's in bowel & bladder & warned I could end up with colostomy and or urostomy if a full hyst is not done asap.
10/2012 Lap Endo dx
07/2013 Have a baby or hyst-figure it out doc says
11/2013 hsg all good
08/2013 200mg levothyroxine, 500mg metformin 2*day, Necon obc
IUI-100mg clomid, estradiol #1Jan 6,2014
1/23/14 -BFN
9/20/2014 IUI #2 100mg clomid, hcg trigger shot, progesterone supps- Doc cancelled IUI and decided to try timed intercourse
10/4/14-BFN
Married 11/1/14
Lap for endo removal-11/28/14
BFP!!!-12/3/14-VERY SCARY 1ST TRI D/T surgery
U/S once a week, then moved to every 2 weeks
2/2/15-Baby looks great! Measuring ahead by 7 days. Doc moved EDD t 08/10/15

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby tryingtobepatient1 » Mon Jan 13, 2014 10:34 am

It'll happen when it happen my gosh I say it sometimes when people are down so I'm a ttc sinner. But 7 months with not one positive opk is getting to me and I regret ever saying that to people!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby randapanda » Mon Jan 13, 2014 4:02 pm

Ahhh yes. Well my mil says to me just keep praying....also the well I had three kids by your age as I wanted to have grandchildren early in life. When I just thought about being pregnant I was......ya well I am not you sorry.

Frustrating!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby MeagieRose » Wed Jan 15, 2014 10:24 pm

I'm young(but not too young :p), so I get the "you're too young for a baby" "a baby would ruin your life" "you're not ready for that right now". Even from my best friend. This is what I, and my soon to be husband want. Shut up and let people live their own lives.


I also die when people say "why don't you just adopt?" to people who haven't had any luck. That's so insensitive. Adoption is a great option. I want to adopt one day. But I want my own children too. Adoption is beautiful, but having your own child is beautiful in a different way.

Some people just don't get it.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby randapanda » Thu Jan 16, 2014 11:52 pm

Ya one of my friends that apparently loves to smoke and drink while pg and loses the baby says to me that the reason I have not gotten pg is bc I stress too much and I am trying too hard....yep thats exactly it. I dont get knocked up by someone I hardly know like she can and I have been married and with the same man for over 7 yrs. HONESTLY!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby Maybebaby88 » Sun Feb 16, 2014 11:50 pm

I hate when it's the oh just stop trying. How do you just not try? Not think about ovulation every month? Or my POS sister that says it? When I'm currently raising her two kids bcuz she's a druggie that managed to get pregnant twice while using? I honestly would like to just hit her sometime on her once a week court ordered visit with her kids. (Whom I'm happily raising and would happily adopt) I just still want to be pregnant and make a little bundle that is half me and half DH.
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby sweetPeaches » Sat Jun 07, 2014 7:59 pm

I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks and the thing people say to me is: when I am at work and I say I am tired some people reply try having kids and working than you will know what tired is! But I reply I'll be glad too!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby nevergivingup » Thu Jun 12, 2014 6:59 am

Just chiming in while in class but I do believe one that gets on my nerves is "You ain't had no baby yet, what you waiting on??" First let's use proper English, 2nd it's not that easy you dork!! Let's try asking, " how are you doing?" Some People think it's really that easy, it took me a year to finally have a successful pregnancy w/o m/c and that question drove me crazy everytime bc everytime it was asked I was in the middle of secretly miscarrying :roll:
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M/C 02/27/2012 @ 12 wks :angel2:
M/C 05/04/12 @ 5wks :angel2:
M/C 08/10/12 @ 7wks :angel2:

Finally God has given us a baby; Baby Tyler born 02/26/2013. Mommy n Daddy never been more in love Thanking only God
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby sweetdemoness87 » Sat Jul 05, 2014 10:36 pm

I guess what ticks me off the most is when I see pregnant people on drugs. I know a lady who is pregnant with her 5th kid and all of her children have been taken away by dfs. Her last one (she is 1) was taken away because she was born addicted to oxycotten. And this dumb chic couldn't understand why the baby was taken from her. Now she is 8 months and STILL addicted to oxycotten and of coarse the baby will be too.
It just drives me infreakinsane that my husband and I are trying so hard, drug free and just waiting for a baby. But every 9 months or so this dumb chic has another kid. She doesn't deserve one obviously but here she is pregnant again.
Also what drives me nuts is seeing people complain about their kids. I realize kids can be annoying. But freaking shut up.
Or when I say that I want babies and they roll their eyes, or say "no you don't." Or "just enjoy your freedon while you can" :doh: OH and when we took my neice to the doc once and the doctor looked at me and said "here's your birthcontrol" I realize they were joking but that was just annoying.

Sorry for the long rant lol.
☆Me:27
☆DH:27
☆Ttc #1 for: 8 months
☆I am: a diabetic《type2》 and have PCOS
☆I take: metforman 2000mg, Asprin, prenaital, progesterone

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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby essiejames23 » Sat Jul 05, 2014 11:54 pm

Uuggghhh! Mine is from my mom "Ya know you're still young... can't you wait just a few more years? When it's meant to be, it'll happen. Just focus on YOU." Need I remind her that I am 23 almost 24 (DH almost 30) and i had a pulmonary embolism and i don't want to find out its too late the older I get the riskier itll get! I have medicaid right now (since PE) so everything would be covered and I would be able to see specialists. I know I still have a year left in school, but every day counts!
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Re: What NOT to Say to Someone TTC!!

Postby essiejames23 » Sat Jul 05, 2014 11:57 pm

On a side note, I have to say its so upsetting when people say "Dont bother getting pregnant itll ruin your life." Thats the most insensitive thing I have ever heard! Children are blessings in every way.
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