I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KittyKat414 » Mon Apr 10, 2017 3:07 pm

:shock: Still no AF?!!? I hope you can get on the road to some answers tomorrow!!! Please keep me posted.. I can't imagine the level of frustration at this point.. :hugs:
(Me)Kat 37
(DH) 35
TTC on and off for 7 long years
DH=Perfect in every way
Dx: Mild PCOS
Metformin 1000mg
HSG: 11/08/16 shows left tube may be blocked
6 Femara cycles = :bfn:
NTNP and Praying for a miracle
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Wed Apr 12, 2017 5:30 am

KittyKat414 wrote::shock: Still no AF?!!? I hope you can get on the road to some answers tomorrow!!! Please keep me posted.. I can't imagine the level of frustration at this point.. :hugs:


Yesterday was not a good day. I went to the appointment (for which the Dr office is 40 minutes away) and when I got there I was told my insurance wouldn't cover today's visit as it's a "consult" and I was like UGH, okay. How much is today's visit? ------$250!! So I gave them my paperwork and stepped out into the hallway to check my credit card balance(s) and try to give husband a call, and I'm starting to cry because WHAT.THE.f**k. :cry:

I, miraculously, get a hold of husband even though he's in a 3 hour difference time zone AND at work. And he hears me crying and says maybe I should just leave call my regular obgyn and request the blood work be done by them instead. I was so upset. Because the day before I called BOTH offices and told them I would be a week late on Tuesday and still testing negative to see if I should a) still keep this appointment b) go to a lab and get some bloodwork
My ob office told me that I should go ahead and go to RE and they'd be able to do that for me. And the RE office said to come on in anyways.

So I went back in the office, half crying, and tell them I'd be leaving. Then I start my descend down the 5 flights of stairs and half way down I'm like SCREW IT, I'll take it out of my savings. I've been waiting long enough. So I go back up and embarrassingly, say I'm staying-I'll just pay out of pocket today.

Honestly, I had so much said to me it felt like I was being talked AT and not talked to and I'm still processing everything. I'm not sure if I'll even be able to go back! But, we have a plan of action if my insurance will pay for the diagnostics--which I was told they WOULD. So we'll see. They want to to a hcg (dye test of my tubes) and some lab work. She offered to give me a 10 day course of progesterone, to make my period start. But I was like uhhhh why aren't we making sure I'm not pregnant right now first?! So I basically MADE them take my blood to tell me if I was pregnant. (Why wouldn't we start there anyway!? DUH). And they're running it sometime this morning and will be calling me to tell me the results. THEN from there I have some choices to make (if I'm not pregnant). But right now I'm not trying to think too far ahead. I just want to know what's going on right NOW then I'll think about what's next from here.

But ultimately when I left I was so emotional I don't think I could make a rational decision about whether it was money well spent or not. I needed to sleep on it, and this morning I'm still kinda ehhhh about it all. I'm just waiting for that phone call, then I'll either celebrate or sulk and come back here and ask some advice. Either way, I'm making steps forward.

When crying to a girlfriend on the way home she asked what me what my gut says. And I told her I have to gut feelings. ( :roll: ) During the day when I'm going through the motions of life but still in the back of my mind slightly obsessing about all this--it's the not knowing that kills me!- I don't believe I'm pregnant, and I just want to move on. But then at night when I'm calm, and in my own space, post yoga/meditation I feel like I am. This makes so sense, and I realize this.

I really hope they call me and tell me what I want to hear today.

I'm probably gonna cross-post some of this~
“Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Wed Apr 12, 2017 10:22 am

Just got the call. Blood work came back negative.
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KittyKat414 » Wed Apr 12, 2017 10:37 am

Ugh.. Im so sorry you had to deal with all that. BUT I think you made the right decision. At least you have some direction now. I've had an HSG done back in November and I'm glad I did. My left tube is blocked at that bummed me out, but at least I had an answer there. The blood work confirmed what I already knew which was mild PCOS. Even though it wasn't news I wanted we at least were able to come up with a plan of attack so to speak. So, that renewed my hope and gave me peace of mind!

I can relate to your feelings as you wait for answers. This past cycle was the same for me. As I waited for AF 14, 15 16 and 17dpo there would be times during the day where I would say there is no way I'm pregnant. Then at night, hope would once again spring up in my spirit. It's really an odd thing to go through because it kept me hopeful during those quiet moments but when AF arrived it hurt a little bit.

Please don't be discouraged, you'll get through this and it will all be worth it when you're holding your baby!

Xxoxox
(Me)Kat 37
(DH) 35
TTC on and off for 7 long years
DH=Perfect in every way
Dx: Mild PCOS
Metformin 1000mg
HSG: 11/08/16 shows left tube may be blocked
6 Femara cycles = :bfn:
NTNP and Praying for a miracle
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Mon Apr 17, 2017 7:10 pm

Hey Kat, how's it going are you in tww yet?
I am ;) more later- just hopped on here cause I've been absent and was thinking of you. Hope all is well!
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Tue Apr 18, 2017 10:47 am

So now that I have a little more time, let me explain...lol

After that shitty appointment on Tuesday, and sulking a little bit after getting the negative result on Wednesday. I was trying to determine what I wanted to do from here. I am thoroughly against taking the 10 day course of Provera to "force my period" to come, I don't want to mess with what was (and I still think is) a perfectly working system, you know? That's what the RE suggested I do, so that they could do the bloodwork on day 2 of the my period, and then schedule an HSG. I considered it, don't get me wrong, but then I looked at a calender and realized if I did the 10 day course, then my period started, then the time to schedule the HSG would be during the same week I'm going to D.C. for husband's graduation from grad school. And I was like, meh- forget it.

In the meantime, the math was looking like I would be ovulating this (now past) weekend--Easter time. And I had all the tell tale signs. Last minute decision I contacted the donor and he was able, there was availability for lodging and my friend was willing to pet sit so I last minute decision said SCREW IT. And said, why not?! I had the most beautiful EWCM on Saturday when I got there and I feel very confident I caught it--whether it'll result in a BFP who the hell knows. I'm not gonna hold my breathe anymore, this mess is too dang stressful. But I knew if I missed this month, I would most certainly be missing next month (because of the graduation) and the idea of skipping two months really bothered me.

SO NOW I WAIT!---AGAIN!

Was your cycle more enjoyable this time? haha :wink:
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KittyKat414 » Wed Apr 19, 2017 9:31 am

Hope!!

Yay!!! I just love your attitude! I'm so glad you went for it.. I don't blame you for not wanting the Provera.. It's just not natural. Hopefully you caught that egg and it STICKS! So that was AF you had while sick?!!?! Would it line up since you O'd? FX'd so much for you my dear!

AFM I'm 9 dpo and gassy. LOL Nothing else going on. AF isn't due for 9 long days. I have a flippin 17 day LP. So I don't expect my PMS symptoms to kick in hardcore for another 2 days. I refuse to test unless I'm late and I'm not holding my breath for a BFP but maybe I'm wrong for once.. LOL And YES BD was awesome!! Even if no BFP I thoroughly enjoyed myself! :rofl:
(Me)Kat 37
(DH) 35
TTC on and off for 7 long years
DH=Perfect in every way
Dx: Mild PCOS
Metformin 1000mg
HSG: 11/08/16 shows left tube may be blocked
6 Femara cycles = :bfn:
NTNP and Praying for a miracle
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Thu Apr 20, 2017 6:38 am

Since we first started this feed back in what, November, I feel like we've both gotten a lot more pragmatic about this whole TTC business....for better or for worse, I'm just tired of holding my dang breathe. I'm gonna enjoy a glass of wine (or whiskey, :lol:) and go about my life as normal during the tww. Cause what's the point in getting all tightly wound? :)

So glad to hear your deed-doing was more enjoyable this round without the Rx! (woohoo!)

So, I'm not sure still about that spotting ("period"?) after I was sick. The timing is still a little off--who the heck knows man! My OPKs were super strong this time around, and holy mucus batman! So I'll take that as a sign, and just keep trucking forward.

IF AF shows up I'll go through with the bloodwork and the HSG but I wasn't willing to take the Provera, I'd rather wait it out to come on it's own. I'm the kinda person that hesitates to take a simple advil when I have a headache, let alone a hormone-altering drug. No thanks. Not right now anyways.

Hang in there girl! Still fingers crossed for us both.

:D
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Fri Apr 21, 2017 6:30 am

Funny you mentioned something about gas :shock: I'm having the same thing, AND a lot more post-O CM than I'm used to.
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Mon Apr 24, 2017 9:26 am

Hey Kat,

Girl, where you at? You know I'm dying for an update! hahaha Anything to keep me out of my own mind. I'm roughly 9 dpo today (maybe 8, maybe 7, who the hell knows) anyways--nothing much to report here at the moment, I haven't really been paying attention though. I'm pretty good at ignoring 'symptoms' until I get about a week out, then I'm like I wanna know nowwwwwwwwwwww gosh. lol. Trying to stay distracted.

Hope all is well!
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KittyKat414 » Mon Apr 24, 2017 9:58 am

Hey girl!!!

Sorry I've been MIA. I've been trying to stay distracted as much as possible! I'm back though. 14dpo today but with my 17 day LP AF isn't due for 4 more days. Annnd.. I have not tested! Woot woot!!! I'm not having any "symptoms" except for some light cramping here and there. Usually I get some pretty intense cramping by now. Other than that, I feel great!!! :) I fully expect AF to show up though so I won''t test unless I'm late so like Saturday if AF stays away.

Ooo!! Post O CM is a sign for some ladies! I hope it means good things for you! Gas can be a symptom too! Eeek!

I get not wanting to pay attention during the TWW. I've been trying to keep busy here and with church stuff because stress is a killer and it doesn't change a darn thing! My DH asked the other day when I was going to call in my Femara Rx and I said whenever I start bleeding. Then he asked, when will that be and at that point I had no clue! I laughed about it because since November I'd been driving him mad and the one time he asked me a cycle question, I had no answer! :rofl:

When will you test?? How long is your LP? Fx'd for some BFPs up in here!!!!
(Me)Kat 37
(DH) 35
TTC on and off for 7 long years
DH=Perfect in every way
Dx: Mild PCOS
Metformin 1000mg
HSG: 11/08/16 shows left tube may be blocked
6 Femara cycles = :bfn:
NTNP and Praying for a miracle
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Mon Apr 24, 2017 10:42 am

Good plan of action, staying busy! I've been trying to do the same.

Yeah, still lots of CM more than I'm used to but *eye roll* whatever, it could be something, it could be nothing, lol. I'm so over it, haha, can you tell? I've been hungry as all get out the last two nights though. I'll eat dinner (like a full daggone meal) and 5 minutes later I'm looking in the cabinet for something, I dunno what that's about. Again-could be something, could be nothing. These bodies are tricky little bastards! :rofl:

HAHA! I love that DH asked and you were like, I dunno! That's how I'm getting to be--a little jaded are we? Also-GOOD FOR YOU! for not testing. My LP is usually 14 days, but you with last month being like it was, I have no Earthly idea. Keep hanging in there, we've come a long way!

IF AF shows this month I'm out again for May, I'll just enjoy the two trips I have planned that month and party like a rock star I guess. Meanwhile I'll move forward with the bloodwork and HSG scheduling. Maybe moving forward less obsessively is the trick. Who knows. I don't think there is any tricks to this madness.
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KittyKat414 » Mon Apr 24, 2017 1:18 pm

I'm going to see my mom weds in NJ so I'm looking forward to that! My besties and DH are coming with so it should be a fun road trip.

I'm hoping your hungries are because of a baby in there! LOL!! I need to buy some internet cheapies this month. Being on here gives me the urge to test and I can't because I have ONE Wondfo ONE walmart .88 test and a FRER. :doh:
(Me)Kat 37
(DH) 35
TTC on and off for 7 long years
DH=Perfect in every way
Dx: Mild PCOS
Metformin 1000mg
HSG: 11/08/16 shows left tube may be blocked
6 Femara cycles = :bfn:
NTNP and Praying for a miracle
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby KateH » Tue Apr 25, 2017 7:49 am

Anyone know what multiple dark lines means?
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Re: I wasn't even going to POAS this morning...

Postby mermaid.hair » Tue Apr 25, 2017 11:19 am

KateH wrote:Anyone know what multiple dark lines means?


Are these OPKs or HPTs?

If these are OPKs I would say CD 16/17 is probably the window of your Ovulation. Often times they darken as you reach your peak and then start to lighten up again, which is what it looks like to me.
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