I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

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I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby kate821 » Tue Nov 24, 2015 6:59 pm

Hey ladies! I'm brand new to tww, and I was so happy to see that there's a support group for women like me! Here's my story; (sorry if I don't know all of the abbreviations yet, still learning!)

I never had a regular period. I was very overweight and she came pretty much whenever she wanted. Over the past year I've worked very hard and lost 150 pounds. As soon as I hit a healthy weight, BOOM. She arrives every month, in the dot. Never early, never late! At the end of July, I noticed that I was feeling "off". I was severely bloated and I was really uncomfortable all the time. I normally have bloating around the time AF is expected but not ever this bad! I started getting AF like cramps and figured it was that. August 5, I started spotting. Along with the cramps and bloating, and the fact that my period had a history of being irregular and early, I thought maybe this month it was just out of whack. August 9, Spotting continued but didn't darken and the cramps got worse! I decided to take a HPT just because I was feeling so strange. I was in total shock when I got a BFP! We weren't ttc, so we were so surprised but so happy! I immediately quit smoking cigarettes (i know, horrible habit!), and started eating better and taking the right vitamins. I had a doctor's appt the next day and the pregnancy was confirmed through a urine sample. When she performed the ultrasound, she couldn't see much but said that I was around 5 weeks along. I had the blood testing done to have my levels checked and was told to wait for a call from the doctor in a few days with some results. On August 13, while browsing babies r us with my husband, I received a call from my doctor saying that based on my test results, i was experiencing a loss. I was in hysterics, denial. I never thought this would happen to me! I went to the bathroom at the store because I got an extremely wet feeling all of a sudden. What was once pink spotting had turned into a very heavy dark red flow. The entire experience was heartbreaking for myself, and my husband. I had a natural MC. Since then, we've been trying to conceive naturally. I haven't been tracking anything except my fertile window up until last month. Honestly, I still don't know much about my ovulation date or anything. I did start tracking CM after some research though. I am expecting AF tomorrow, as my cycles have been regular since a month after MC. something seems different. I've got no signs of AF. but not really any symptoms of pregnancy either :\ it's so confusing. The only symptoms I'm having over the last 3 days or so had been lower back and neck pain, random short dizzy spells, especially if I stand up too fast. And I'm on and off overly emotional without reason. If I'm checking correctly, my cervix has felt very high and soft for two days and I've had two types of CM on and off, white, creamy/lotion like, and clear/watery (which is currently where it's at). Any of you ladies have the same symptoms (or lack thereof) before a BFP? I've been researching like a mad woman and the wait is driving me bananas! Sending so many hugs and prayers to each and every one of you! Fingers crossed for a BFP followed by healthy, full term pregnancies! <3
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Re: I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby Kandii » Wed Nov 25, 2015 8:45 am

Welcome Kate!
No one wants to be apart of this group, but its great to have the support of those who've gone through the experience.

First off I want to say congrats on the weight loss and quitting smoking~! Those are great achievements!!

My very first pregnancy ended in miscarriage and it took quite some time before my cycles went back to regular. I had some retained tissue in my system and it was still producing HCG but not enough to get a positive pregnancy test. Was super annoying.
I had really bad dizziness with my first pregnancy. There would be several times while at work I had to sit down cause it felt like the world was moving under my feet! They were also pretty short, lasting maybe a minute max.

Things after a MC in your cycle can be super wonky - including new symptoms. I remember being very determined to get another BFP after my first loss. Thankfully my second BFP I was able to carry the baby to term. Just know that after a MC things can take quite a bit of time to re-settle into normal again.

FX and baby dust to you!!
~*TTC since October 2013*~
BFP Dec 29, 2013 / Blighted Ovum Jan 23, 2014 (8w5d) / MC Feb 5, 2014 (10w4d)
Got my rainbow BFP July 19th, 2014!
DS born March 24th, 2015

~*TTC #2* shhh :shh: it's a secret!~
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Re: I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby kate821 » Wed Nov 25, 2015 9:06 am

Thanks so much for the response! Got the lovely visit from AF this Morning. So discouraging! :( now all I can do is try to track my ovulation day. Any tips you can send my way on how to track everything to get the timing right? I have this horrible fear that I won't be able to conceive. I know it's just me over thinking but it's hard not to sometimes. How long after your MC did you get your BFP? Thank you!!
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Re: I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby Kandii » Wed Nov 25, 2015 8:16 pm

I miscarried in Feb and got my BFP in July. So I had to wait quite awhile.
I use fertility friend to track my cycle length, cm, and OPKs. I find it really helpful. I tried temping this cycle but I hate it. Lol.
~*TTC since October 2013*~
BFP Dec 29, 2013 / Blighted Ovum Jan 23, 2014 (8w5d) / MC Feb 5, 2014 (10w4d)
Got my rainbow BFP July 19th, 2014!
DS born March 24th, 2015

~*TTC #2* shhh :shh: it's a secret!~
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Re: I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby kate821 » Wed Nov 25, 2015 8:19 pm

I thought about temping but the whole process is so overwhelming. I don't want ttc to seem like a chore. Congrats on your bfp!
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Re: I need to stop obsessing...but i cant!

Postby Kandii » Wed Nov 25, 2015 8:26 pm

Thanks. DH and I are TTC our second now :)

I would start with something easy. Like chatting with FF. Then start adding things if you feel the need too. Sometimes just tracking your cycle length is enough!
I liked the added reassurance OPKs gave me. I liked knowing my fertile window
~*TTC since October 2013*~
BFP Dec 29, 2013 / Blighted Ovum Jan 23, 2014 (8w5d) / MC Feb 5, 2014 (10w4d)
Got my rainbow BFP July 19th, 2014!
DS born March 24th, 2015

~*TTC #2* shhh :shh: it's a secret!~
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Kandii
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