Depression

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Depression

Postby Mariewinsin » Wed Feb 07, 2018 2:41 am

Hey there. I hope that you all are doing good. How to deal with depression in infertility. I know that it is a very sensitive issue. It requires guts to talk about it. But I really want to know about it. I've seen women crying over this thing. I've seen them getting themselves on antidepressants. We all know that family is the greatest blessing. We all know that it's wonderful to be pregnant. Everyone dreams to have one. Everyone wishes for it. So it's a real heart-wrenching thing that a woman can't have children. It would be so nice of you if your replies add to my info. Thanks in advance!
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Re: Depression

Postby FarmerL » Sun Mar 04, 2018 12:17 pm

How to deal with depression
... Go shoe shopping and join support groups. Seriously, for me, I needed a diagnosis. Then I was frantic until I had a treatment plan and timeline. Now I have to wait a couple months until the next step so I keep a journal, count my blessings many times a day, and put energy into my job, church, and extended family. Coffee helps too! I wonder if oxytocin would help also, it is a happy hormone? Read somewhere that you can buy oxytocin sprays.
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Re: Depression

Postby @whenmytruerainbow » Thu Apr 19, 2018 4:19 am

I know how it feels, dear. Here it's vital to have one another for support. My husband has always been amazing and positive over fertility treatments. He always told me we just had to work harder than most to get there! Actually the path was never that easy. We passed 2 failed ivf rounds with own eggs. This time we found ourselves overseas preparing for ivf with donor egg. I think I’ll feel better when we hear back from the consultant on the egg histories and what she thinks the plan should be with egg donors. It’s just exhausting because even when you’re having a “break” you’ve still got so much to think about! The last 2 years of my life have just gone so fast with all the tests, treatment etc. :hugs:
Looking forward to getting my positive mojo back! I really need it!
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Re: Depression

Postby AmySmith » Thu Jan 17, 2019 11:52 am

It's good to see that you're talking about this. People do not regard mental illnesses as important. Especially for women trying to conceive. That's really unfair, to be honest. It's good to see you raising awareness. Thank you for discussing this! I hope it changes the general mindset. This is the only way to do it! Keep up the good work.
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Re: Depression

Postby hannahdavid » Fri Jan 18, 2019 12:26 pm

I myself suffer from this. It is important to first surround yourself with positivity. Make sure that people around you are not critical towards you. For me strangely the clinic made a huge difference because the one I am visiting now is soo much more positive. I felt really good about everything. Other than this visiting a therapist is really important as well. I hope you are soon able to recover. Sending baby dust your way.
-Low AMH and High FSH
-Poor Ovarian Reserve
-5 IUIs (failed)
-1 IVF (failed)
Life is a total mess
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Re: Depression

Postby Caprice » Sun Jan 20, 2019 11:33 am

Depression is a big problem, along with other mental illnesses. Most women experience this during their TTC journey. It's because of the added pressure to give birth and the fact that nobody can anticipate being infertile. Children are always seen as something that will happen eventually in life. It doesn't work that way for some, like us. I'm glad you're raising awareness about such an important problem! Thank you for this.
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Re: Depression

Postby @whenmytruerainbow » Thu Jan 24, 2019 6:50 am

You should find strength to pull yourself together!! If you have been trying to conceive for over a year and you are 35 or younger, or if you are older than 35 and have been TTC for over 6 months, I recommend you to resort to a fertility clinic, since once that period of time has passed, then the most probable is that there is some fertility problem. Firstly, your doctor is the one who actually knows the details of you particular case, so you should trust him on the treatment to follow to achieve pregnancy. Egg donation offers high success rates in women with endometriosis, as the quality of donor eggs is considerably high. In principle, having your tubes blocked does not translate into female sterility by default. However, for your own peace of mind, I recommend that you ask for a second medical opinion. As donor-egg IVF might be an expensive procedure if done in the home area. We had to travel abroad to bio texcom and seek help there. mainly 'cause of their 'guaranteed'' plan. We've signed up for all-inclusive 5 shots. guarantee means a live birth or money refund. This was really our last resort. Ended up with bfp. Wishing you, all lovelies here, soon babydust, the best of luck, love, care and support. :sticky:
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Re: Depression

Postby @whenmytruerainbow » Thu Jan 24, 2019 6:56 am

hannahdavid wrote:I myself suffer from this. It is important to first surround yourself with positivity. Make sure that people around you are not critical towards you. For me strangely the clinic made a huge difference because the one I am visiting now is soo much more positive. I felt really good about everything. Other than this visiting a therapist is really important as well. I hope you are soon able to recover. Sending baby dust your way.

I'm glad you've had good experience so far. But it's all about those who can choose -use their own egg or donor egg. but most of the patients might not have another choice. they have indications for unconditional donation, such as lack of ovarian, "lazy ovaries" syndrome, surgery, chemotherapy, genetic hereditary diseases, menopause etc. I've been among those. Hardly could I think I'd face it ever. Special thanks to our awesome dr Elena Mozgovaya who has helped us though..
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Re: Depression

Postby SandraTiano » Fri Jan 25, 2019 6:14 am

Hi marie! I m doing great, I hope you are doing good as well. To deal with depression you need to distract your mind from it. Do things that make you happy. Things like watching movies, shopping, hanging out with friends. Just do anything that can help you stay strong. Good luck!
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Re: Depression

Postby EstrellaS » Sat Jan 26, 2019 4:26 am

Marie, thank you for this post. I can relate so much to it. Yeah, we should prioritize mental healthcare for intended parents. I know, I've been through that time. It's so tough to deal with all of that! I'm glad people are finally talking about this. I hope people actually learn from it.
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Re: Depression

Postby @whenmytruerainbow » Tue Feb 19, 2019 6:08 am

This pains so much to see all of you, lovelies, here struggling :cry: I've been in your shoes for many years. Infertility pains much. It's not the thing chosen. And quite often it isolates us from our normal ordinary lives. I've tred to be open with others first about out ttc problems. Meaning all the family and close friends knew we were fighting to conceive. I hoped I'd gain some faith/support from them. But it turned out to be disastrous for me. Soon I started hating them..For the pity in their eyes for me..For their chats about me behind my back..That was the toughest. And, finally, the top reason - all the people around who were getting prego tried to hide this from me!! 'Cause I couldn't conceive on my own and that would hurt me!! So what, you guys think..if you hide news from me and I then get to know about it in such a way will rescue me from the hearache??!!
Since then I decided this was gonna be the problem between us two only - dh and me. And it did helped me to keep sane.
Do you, lovelies, feel open about your ttc problems with others except those on the forum boards??
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Re: Depression

Postby @whenmytruerainbow » Tue Feb 19, 2019 6:18 am

SandraTiano wrote:Hi marie! I m doing great, I hope you are doing good as well. To deal with depression you need to distract your mind from it. Do things that make you happy. Things like watching movies, shopping, hanging out with friends. Just do anything that can help you stay strong. Good luck!

I'm sorry to say this but items mentioned did not help me much :( I felt just isolated. I wanted to see nobody. My only rock of support was my husband. He was the one who really helped me through all the complications we faced whilst undergoing treatments. When even researching IVF treatment for the first time, we were so much unclear of how the process works. In the simplest terms, we knew it could be broken down into several steps. But we could hardly imagine what actually this would mean for us..My body seemed not the best responder to treatments. Leading us to cancelled cycles, and multiple failures before finally we used donor egg overseas. As women age, the number of oocytes that are produced in ovaries decrease naturally, especially after the age of 37. Age alone has a major effect on our fertility. Age makes it hard for fertilization and pregnancy to occur. I wish we started ttc much earlier!! This path might be quite a lonely journey though. I'm so thankful we've had this great forum in use when moving through all the hardles..May God bless all of you.
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Re: Depression

Postby Ly83 » Mon Apr 29, 2019 7:22 am

Hi Marie, first of all thank you for your post, because we all know it's not an easy journey and even if people say women like us are strong to fight for our dream, the reality is that our journey is full of suffering and finding a balance is not that easy. I think my strenght was my DH, he was always by my side, listening to me and giving me support in my black days. Then I agree that your clinic is essential. I found a clinic where the woman following my treatment was realy kind and I felt free to show all my fears and doubts.

I hope you are surrounded by people who love you and give you support. Because even if we all felt alone in this journey, it's important to find someone who can listen to you. It's important to rise the awarness on this issue because it's part of the journey of fertility treatments.
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