Turned 41 today and..

TTC in our fabulous forties!

Moderators: unaffected, JessM, southernbelle, maddy

Turned 41 today and..

Postby LeighB » Mon Jul 02, 2012 8:01 am

never have I felt so inadequate. I ovulated 2 weeks ago, POAS this morning and got a BFN. I don't mean to be a debbie downer but I am just so sad, and mad and not sure what to do next. My husband and I are just 4 years married, first time for both of us, and neither one of us have children. I feel as though I have wasted away my child bearing years (I have had 4 MC's in the past 2 years). I'm not sure about IVF (it just doesn't feel like the right thing for us), and adoption sounds like an even worse emotional roller coaster. I hate being told that I am to hold to be able to conceive on my own when I feel so healthy. My husband wants to keep trying, and I just don't know what to do because I feel like a wreck. Infertility is consuming my life. So anyway...sorry for the rant, I am just so sad, and eventually I have to get ready for the day and go pretend to be happy around friends and family.
User avatar
LeighB
Member
Member
 
Posts: 41
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Florida

Postby Tudie1 » Mon Jul 02, 2012 12:46 pm

You don't say it in your post, but have you been to the doctor for a fertility work-up?

You wrote that you hate being told that you're too old to conceive, and I'm wondering who told you that. Was it a doctor, following bloodwork? Or is it something you feel that you're being told by society?

Good luck with whatever decision you make, whether it's to keep trying naturally, to move to fertility treatments (if you aren't already doing them), IUI, IVF, or adoption.

Examine your options, I'm sure the answer will come to you and your husband. :D
Me (Tudie): 40
DH: 38
DD: 12/94
DS: 10/10
Married since 03/1996
TTC #3 since 01/2011
My blog = http://foreverinhope.blogspot.com/
User avatar
Tudie1
TTC Princess
TTC Princess
 
Posts: 259
Joined: Fri Jun 10, 2011 12:00 am

thank you

Postby LeighB » Mon Jul 02, 2012 2:07 pm

it was a hard morning...the day is getting a little better, my husband still has hope and had some very encouraging words for me.

@Tudie1 I have had pretty much all the work done and then some by a reputable RE. I have a low follicle count, had a egg sized fibroid removed, a minor septum problem fixed, and I also was on 100mg Clomid for 3 months. 2 of the MC's were analyzed and everything seemed normal. My RE suggested donor eggs, saying that was my best bet.

@Lucky Jules It is encouraging to hear you had your babies at 41 and 43.

Thanks to both of you for responding to my post. I know ttc is not easy for everyone, and we are still discussing all our options, even though I don't think we will be doing the IVF, IUI thing, but not 100% on that yet. What I really want to do is find a therapist, or a support group. Going to start looking tomorrow for one tomorrow.

thank you once again,
Leigh
User avatar
LeighB
Member
Member
 
Posts: 41
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Florida

Postby Fittblonde » Mon Jul 02, 2012 5:28 pm

Leigh, do not give up hope! Seriously. I too had 4 mc in 2 years. We tried IVF which was a big fat failure and was not for me. My AMH is so low that I only responded with 3 eggs each time they stimmed me. We were set to move onto egg donation as recommneded by my RE. For me, I didnt care about a biological child. My husband and I just wanted a baby to love and nuture. We were all set to move onto egg donation in May/June 2012. I was well into acupunture for 6 months and boom in early March I got a positive pregnancy test! I am almost 20 weeks. Just got amnio results last week and the test was normal.

I say it is a great sign you can get pregnant. I hope it happens for you soon. Hang in there...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY fellow Cancer!!!! I turn 43 in 2 weeks.
Theresa 44, DH: 37
TTC #1 since 2/14/10 - 4 MC
3/11 Au natural BFP 10 DPO! Beta 1237 16 dpo
5/09 9 wk baby passed - boy Trisomy 15
IVF #1: 11/2011 - 3 retrieved - none to transfer

March 2012 au natural BFP at 9dpo!!!
3/14 Beta 1: 70@12DPO
3/16 Beta 2: 217@14DPO
5/14 NT scan and Maternity 21 Plus BW - norma
Amino and Micro Array testing - ALL NORMAL!!!!l
Donor egg cycle canceled due to our miracle
Chloe Ann arrived November 20, 2012 Via induction
TTC Baby #2 Au Natural until November 2014 then we will move onto Donor Eggs
Image
User avatar
Fittblonde
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 2657
Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2010 12:00 am
Location: Los Angeles

Postby TTCnumber2at42 » Tue Jul 03, 2012 4:08 am

No matter how many times I hear your story Fittblonde, I get inspired! Congrats on your amnio and keep us updated.

LeighB, hang in there! This is a great forum to rant, ask questions, lean on fellow TTCer.... your time will come. Just remember there is no "miracle pill" and obviously what works for one couple doesn't necessarily work for another. Keep yourself educated and don't give up hope. Oh yes, and happy birthday!
Me 42 in September 2012 ~DH 35 in June 2012 ~DS 2 in July 2012
Angel #1 March 2008 6 weeks 6 days
Angel # 2 May 2011 6 weeks 2 days
My Ovulation Chart
User avatar
TTCnumber2at42
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 597
Joined: Fri Mar 09, 2012 1:00 am
Location: Ontario, Canada

Postby Fittblonde » Tue Jul 03, 2012 1:54 pm

TTC...thank you. I will keep you updated. Just waiting for my micro array results and then I can breath a little easier.
Theresa 44, DH: 37
TTC #1 since 2/14/10 - 4 MC
3/11 Au natural BFP 10 DPO! Beta 1237 16 dpo
5/09 9 wk baby passed - boy Trisomy 15
IVF #1: 11/2011 - 3 retrieved - none to transfer

March 2012 au natural BFP at 9dpo!!!
3/14 Beta 1: 70@12DPO
3/16 Beta 2: 217@14DPO
5/14 NT scan and Maternity 21 Plus BW - norma
Amino and Micro Array testing - ALL NORMAL!!!!l
Donor egg cycle canceled due to our miracle
Chloe Ann arrived November 20, 2012 Via induction
TTC Baby #2 Au Natural until November 2014 then we will move onto Donor Eggs
Image
User avatar
Fittblonde
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 2657
Joined: Mon Aug 02, 2010 12:00 am
Location: Los Angeles

Postby katyogi » Wed Jul 04, 2012 10:47 am

LeighB, that must have been one of your worst birthdays. I know that I would be trying not to get my hopes up, but really really hoping that I would get the most amazing birthday gift ever - your BFP, right?
Plus, being another year older, and everything that entails.... I totally understand your pain, and I think a support group would be a great idea. I've thought of it myself over the past years that I've been on this journey.

It's tough to stay positive on this journey - for me, it gets challenging during the 2ww. Having these forums is helpful for me because I don't know of anyone who is going through this except for here online. I love being able to log in and, even if I don't write anything, I'm pretty much on here every day for the support it gives me.

Hugs to you, Leigh. I hope you're feeling better today.
User avatar
katyogi
Friend
 
Posts: 19
Joined: Tue Jun 19, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Canada

Postby dove0813 » Mon Jul 30, 2012 3:10 pm

Don't give up, keep trying! With God all things are possible!
Start BD a few days before your ovulation week starts, and continue every other day until the end of your ovulation week. I also lowered my caffeine intake, took folic acid/prenatal vitamin before trying, and DH took multivitamin. This helped us get pregnant right away.
Good luck and God bless :)
dove0813
Member
Member
 
Posts: 20
Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Kentucky

Postby KyrinM » Fri Sep 07, 2012 1:52 pm

Don't give up, when I told my GP we were going to have my tubal reversed and start TTC, she really pissed me off because she kept repeating over & over about how old I was. I am 42. Had my first child at 31, second one at 36 & feel she is being stupid to think that 42 is some kind of magic number meaning that pregnancy can't be achieved just because of it.

My best advice is to not stress about it, enjoy being with your husband when you make love & just be in the moment, leave the TTC thoughts outside the bed & just be together. I think we get so wrapped up in the TTC part we forget to be with each other & I think that affects our success as well.

Just pay attention to when you should be ovulating, & try to have loving romantic Baby Dance nights during that period as often as you can, but don't put a lot of priority to it. My husband & I make love almost every day not because we are TTC, but because we enjoy being together. We are thinking we are actually going to have stop making love so much to make sure he has ammunition when I am ovulating...lol!

Anyway, I know how you feel, but if your docs say everything is working as it should, then just try to not think about it too much for a little while, stress can play a big part in this. Hugs!

Kyrin
User avatar
KyrinM
Friend
 
Posts: 17
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Idaho

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby LeighB » Thu Oct 18, 2012 3:04 am

We did it...POAS this morning and it was positive! Two and a half years later and we finally did it! Please send me some positive vibes out into the universe!!!
User avatar
LeighB
Member
Member
 
Posts: 41
Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2012 12:00 am
Location: Florida

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby Luvsdogs » Thu Oct 18, 2012 7:34 am

:D that is soooo great! Congrats! Sticky baby dust to you!
Me 41
DH 40
DD Dec 2010
Baby Gavin went to heaven 21.6 weeks Trisomy 18
CP's Feb 2013, May 2013, Aug, 2013
Femara, Ovidrel, and timed bd cycles-
Oct= bfn follie sizes 18, 15, 3@14
Nov= 3 nice follies at 20, 22, 22 (also a 15 and 14) BFN :(
End Nov= follie sizes 20, 18, 16, 14.
BFP Dec 1 !!!!
Luvsdogs
TTC Princess
TTC Princess
 
Posts: 180
Joined: Mon Sep 24, 2012 9:11 am

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby tiffanynp » Mon Oct 22, 2012 12:43 pm

Just read this...YAY Leigh...CONGRATS!!!!! So happy for you dear!!!!
Me, Tiffany: 40. DH: 43. DD: 17mo's.
TTC#2 since June 2012.
Cycle #1: Chemical bfp June 2012 :(.
Cycle #4: Clomid 100mg cd3-7 Angel baby @ 9w1d on Nov 18, 2012 :(.
Cycle#5: Clomid 100mg cd3-7; BFN.
Cycle#6: Femara 5mg cd3-7; Angel baby#2 @ 5w4d on March 3, 2013 :(.
DIAGNOSED with MTHFR by RE on 4/8/13 as possible cause of mc...FX next preg is take home baby!!!
Cycle#7: Femara 5mg cd3-7, Ovaboost, Aspirin, and Foligard; BFP!!!!!!! :)
Image
Image
DD conceived on first cycle of Clomid 100mg after 3cycles BFN on Clomid 50mg.
Image
tiffanynp
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 2123
Joined: Thu Dec 09, 2010 1:00 am
Location: Texas

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby Second_Chance » Tue Oct 23, 2012 11:02 am

YAY...... ANOTHER ONE........ :happyforyou: Positive thoughts to you. Congrats......
Me: 44 DH: 45
TTC #1 since June 2012
DH- Perfect
ME- DOR due to age

March 2013 started taking DHEA 25mg 3 times a day FSH is now 8.5... down from 17.8 from 3 months earlier. They want it well below 10.

June, 2013- AMH level .016 (low) they want it over 1.

June 2013- Antral Follicle Ct- 6 (low) they want it over 10.


My Current Cycle Chart
Image
My Ovulation Chart
|| [url=http;//www.fertilityfriend.com]Ovulation Calendar[/url]
Second_Chance
TTC Princess
TTC Princess
 
Posts: 291
Joined: Tue Jul 17, 2012 12:00 am
Location: USA- Midwest

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby momof2girls1017 » Wed Oct 24, 2012 6:52 pm

OH MY GOD!! I AM SUPER SUPER THRILLED FOR YOU!! I WAS JUST READING YOUR THREADS FOR THE FIRST TIME AND WAS HOPING FOR A POSITIVE OUTCOME!!! GOOD LUCK !! GOD BLESS!!
momof2girls1017
BabyDuster
BabyDuster
 
Posts: 95
Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 11:25 am

Re: Turned 41 today and..

Postby TTCnumber2at42 » Thu Oct 25, 2012 4:54 am

OMG Leigh that is amazing! You are # 6 of the over 40 who got pregnant since I joined this forum in March (out of maybe 12-15 regular posters) ... now what were the doctors saying about less tthan 5% of women get pregnant over 40 naturally???? Hmmm I think that is fooey. We are up to 40% now!
Me 42 in September 2012 ~DH 35 in June 2012 ~DS 2 in July 2012
Angel #1 March 2008 6 weeks 6 days
Angel # 2 May 2011 6 weeks 2 days
My Ovulation Chart
User avatar
TTCnumber2at42
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 597
Joined: Fri Mar 09, 2012 1:00 am
Location: Ontario, Canada

Next

Return to TTC in our 40s

cron