Am I too old?

TTC in our fabulous forties!

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Am I too old?

Postby CynZim » Fri Jun 19, 2015 5:30 am

So, I'm very, very angry with my husband right now. He had an appointment with our family doctor yesterday to get a physical done before he takes our son to scout camp. He told the doctor that we were ttc. She expressed concern about my age and health (I am diabetic). Like I haven't already thought about those things?!?! I've already decided that I will stop ttc after this summer--two more cycles and I'm calling it quits. Now I feel like I can't face my family doctor--I'm supposed to have an appointment next month (just my semi-annual follow-up). I'm thinking of rescheduling until the fall, then if she says something it doesn't matter.
Am I making too much of this?
btw, am 10 dpo, near the end of the tww. No feeling of anything, either way. Won't test until at least next Thursday, if af doesn't show by then.
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby Allsmiles » Fri Jun 19, 2015 9:29 am

No you're not too old, that's your decision, but why angry at your DH?
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby CynZim » Fri Jun 19, 2015 10:04 am

Hi, Allsmiles!

Good luck with the weightloss! I need to lose some weight, too, but am still recovering from the school year, so I haven't really been trying too hard.
I'm mad at DH because I don't understand why he had to say anything to her; it should have been my decision to tell her or not, not him. Of course this followed another issue that occurred earlier, so I'm being more sensitive than I might normally be. And you're right, it IS my decision!
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby Allsmiles » Fri Jun 19, 2015 12:18 pm

Aww thanks - ttc has made me gain some "poundage" along the way. :oops:

Ahhhhh I get ya re your DH. I see what you mean!

Yes, it absolutely is your decision. I went to the Doc recently and told him after I dropped some weight that I wanted to try for a baby and he said to me, "as long as you are having a monthly period, it can happen" and he smiled at me. I'm coming up for 43 this Nov and he really made me feel reassured. I truly detest the way some medical professionals have to inject their opinion with regard to your reproductive life! Keep your opinions to yourself!

So you keep at it girl and you make the decision as to when to stop. :D
Mom to three. :angel: November '14. Suspected :angel: April '15.
His swimmers work, just need that R A I N B O W
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby CynZim » Sat Jun 20, 2015 8:43 am

I'm going to be 43 in January! It doesn't seem that old, but I can remember when I thought 30 was 'old'.
I know what you mean about ttc causing weight gain. I'm convinced some of my weight issue has to do with the fertility issues. I know that other things contribute, as well (diabetes, medication, etc), but regardless, it does make things more 'challenging'. I hope that you have a good outcome with your weightloss efforts. I hope that I can lose some, as well, though I don't weight any more than I did when I conceived my DS (and his twin; lost her during the pregnancy). And while I was pregnant, I actually lost some weight and ended up nearly 40lbs lighter after his birth!

Anyway, take care! Enjoy your weekend!
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby Jamster34 » Tue Aug 04, 2015 1:19 pm

Im glad to have seen this post , I went to a new obgyn yesterday and right away she is referring me to a specialist because of my age Im 39 will be 40 in March. She really made me feel hopeless when leaving her office :-(
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby Alchemist » Tue Aug 11, 2015 4:52 am

Yep. My gynae gave me a lecture about deformities and so did my FS......trying to get me to do PGS with IVF but hell the costs involved are crazy
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby mimimama » Wed Dec 09, 2015 7:06 am

Hi there, Alchemist docs usually recommend ivf pgs cause of advanced maternal age. If you search the internet you will find cheaper options in popular ivf low cost countries (e.g. Poland, Russia etc)
Me 31, DH 40. TTC 5 years. Unexplained infertility.
December 2015- IVF #1 BFN
May/June 2016- new doctor, IVF consultation in Gdansk Poland
October 2016- IVF #2 Invicta BFP!!!
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby baruderu » Thu Dec 10, 2015 6:30 am

Nonsense!! You are NOT too old. That is ridiculous. If you had serious complications of a medical nature then the doctor would and should have spoken to YOU about her concerns, not your husband. But that's a moot point since she is just commenting on your age. Grrrr. I hate being treated like a medical anomaly- I'm 42 and 22 weeks pregnant with my second and I get comments as well. I was 40 with my first and they tried to bully me into an induction at 39 week even though my pregnancy was absolutely healthy and perfect in every way. I bullied back and said NO.

At any rate, I'm sorry you are being picked on because of your age. :x

Edited to say that my baby was conceived without meds and he has gotten the all clear via NIPT and IPS genetic testing. I know an older maternal age increases the risk of issues but there's still a very, very good chance of having a perfectly baba. Keep the faith! :D
My son was born in Feb 2014
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby Young 45 » Sun Mar 13, 2016 6:49 pm

I had my first at 35, my second at 40, and we're hoping to get lucky at 45. All was well with both of mine.
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Re: Am I too old?

Postby FosterMom » Thu May 19, 2016 5:11 am

Cyn why would you be mad at your DH? He is concerned as well and wants to make it work. A doctor is going to express concern for anyone over 30 as that is their textbook job. I cannot imagine my doc if I showed up pregnant. Love your hubby. It sounds like you are ashamed to be trying...who gives a s**t what your doc says as long as you are good with being pregnant..? Unless you know there are other reasons you should not be and don't want to hear that right now. Clear your feelings, because none of them involve your DH or doc...this is all about you. I hope you find clarity and let that bubby come down. God bless.
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