TTC in our fabulous forties!
Wed Apr 20, 2016 1:55 am
There is an old thread like this from 2014 - but thought I'd start another. Lets get to know each other! Feel free to answer only the questions you want to.
Conceiving in your 40's has it's own unique challenges (even despite being healthy/active etc) Statistics aren't on our side, but we can help eachother stay positive!Your Age/Partner's Age:
How long have you been together and TTC:
Do you have children, if so how many and ages:
Do you (or your partner) have any infertility issues:
TTC plans for 2016: (IVF, IUI, fertility meds, supplements, OPKs, BBT charting, NTNP, etc,):
Symptoms you are experiencing:
Anything else to share:
Much of the above info is in my signature - I just want to connect with others the same age, I do not have anyone (in REAL life) to talk to about this stuff!!!!
Fri May 20, 2016 10:27 am
I've been enjoying skimming through ttc message boards and thought I'd try to locate one for 2016. Most ttc boards I come across have posts from a few years ago.
I am 40 1/2 years old.... tick-tock-tick-tock. My husband is 42 1/2. We decided to try for our second child last fall. Due to a few timing type issues we have only actively tried 3 cycles. I'm in my 2WW of that third cycle now.
We have a great little boy who is about to turn 9 and we both adore him and parenthood so much that we really want to try for another while there is still time.
We don't have any known fertility issues. Most of my 30s I had a 28 day cycle. More recently I've had 24 day cycles. When we tried for our first we got pregnant pretty easily / naturally a few times. We did have a couple of miscarriages though.
I spoke with my OB/GYN about ttc last Fall and he's incredibly supportive. Besides with my little family of three and my mom I'm not discussing ttc in real life at this point so it will help to have a place online to chat through this.
I've had a lot of 2WW symptoms but it is so hard to distinguish when many of them can be luteal phase / PMS symptoms as well. I wish I had been paying as close to this two weeks before trying so I had better comparisons. Some of the symptoms that stand out are bloating that starts about 2 inches above my belly button and then down to my C-section scar, low cramping... again along the C-section scar, low back burning similar to when I have my period. On and off heavy breasts with pronounced Montgomery glands. Around 5dpo I got unreasonably irritable (and felt bad about it). I've had a few random headaches which isn't normal for me. I've had a coffee aversion this week, too which is odd. BUT, I've also had a couple of BFN's. My cycle is due Monday if the 24 day cycle holds again this month. I'm cautiously optimistic but ready to try again next month if needed.
Let's share and support each other here!
Fri May 20, 2016 4:09 pm
I'm technically 39, but close enough to 40 that I may count.
Your Age/Partner's Age: 39/34
How long have you been together and TTC: we got married 5 months ago and JUST started TTC
Do you have children, if so how many and ages: none
Do you (or your partner) have any infertility issues: not that we know of; my blood tests were slightly negative but not dismal.
TTC plans for 2016: (IVF, IUI, fertility meds, supplements, OPKs, BBT charting, NTNP, etc,): We're trying pre-seed and will probably use OPKs. I'm meeting with my doctor to see what else we can and should do now.
Symptoms you are experiencing: n/a
Anything else to share: I'm scared. We really want at least one child. We met each other late (for me) so we're trying to make the best of it. This is my first time trying so we'll see how it goes.
Fri May 20, 2016 5:51 pm
Hi Crumpet, I'm glad to hear back from someone else so quickly. I hope you have success quickly. IMO Parenthood really is one of the best things in life.
We used Preseed back in 2006 when we conceived our son. I had sort of forgot about it but my husband reminded me of it. I was glad to easily find it at our CVS pharmacy a few weeks ago and we used it again this cycle.
I picked up a few more pregnancy tests this evening. This time I bought them at Dollar Tree which really keeps the cost down. They detect down to an hug level of 25 which is great for 1$. I saw the have OPKs for $1, too. I still have some for next month if we aren't successful this go round but I will stock up from there when/if I need more.
I have not started charting basal temps again yet but may next month if we don't get our BP this month. I did it in '06/'07 and it is interesting and telling. I pulled out those old charts to look at this evening.
I am a tad queasy this evening with a slight headache. I am hoping they are good signs but could also just be PMS.
Just have to be patient a few more days to see if the cycle starts over.
Where are you with your current cycle ?
Sat May 21, 2016 8:21 am
Scrpbookr, its great to have a TTC buddy!
I'm at CD12 of my first cycle trying. We're just entering my fertile window (although we started BD early just in case). My OPK arrives on Monday and I'll use that just to be sure the calendar method is accurate for me. I just started using the Ovia ap for my iPhone. It really helps me visualize my period and fertile window predictions. This is helpful since I have to work abroad for part of next month.
Where are you in your cycle now? It sounds like you're near the end of your TWW. I haven't been through that -- I'm sure its both exciting and terrible at the same time. Its good to hear that charting basal temps is informative. My mother used it and loved it (she's a scientist so, that's to be expected!). I haven't started doing that yet since I'm worried it will feel 'clinical'. I may start next month though since I have inherited my mother's love of data collection.
Sat May 21, 2016 11:23 am
Hi Crumpet, You are entering the more fun/ hopeful part of the cycle. I wish you tons of baby dust and lots of beginners luck!
I think the charting of bbt is comforting. So much of this feels a bit out of our control. The charting gives a sense of understanding and control. When I looked back at my charts from '06/'07 yesterday there are clear ovulation dips, implantation dips, and when we had sucess
Sat May 21, 2016 11:33 am
I tested again early this morning. Another bfn... I have been having 24 day cycles so we should possibly know more Monday. I did take my temp as I woke this morning and compared it to the old charts. It is up at 98.3 two days before expected period. That looked typical for me whether we were successful or not. If it plummets the next couple of mornings I will know we are starting over but I am hoping for that triphasic rise.
You mentioned that you'll be travelling. Are you together for ovulation this month and possibly next?
We had several months in a row early this year that I was travelling and we were apart. Makes it hard to make a baby. What part of the world are you in? I'm in the US...Pennsylvania
Sat May 21, 2016 12:18 pm
Scrpbookr -- I'm glad you're responsive today. I'm obsessing about fertility and pregnancy today since it is the first fertile day of our first cycle TTC. Thank you for the good wishes. We could use them! Since we're novices we don't have a lot of data or understanding about what works for us. We're looking forward to the next few days -- lots of laughing and jokes since its our first time TTC. I hope we get some beginner's luck too! I'm pondering starting to BBT next month. I've heard others say it is a good early predictor of pregnancy also, which is really wonderful. More data feels comforting -- as if we can get more control over things.
I'm sorry about your BFN. Hopefully its too early and you can turn that around! I'm sure its discouraging starting over again. I'm already dreading that.
I'm able to control the dates of my trip next month to some degree. I'm trying to schedule it as early as possible so it will take place during the TWW and early in my cycle. I aim to be home a day or so before the fertile window. I don't want to miss that! I feel like every month counts for us right now. I got a bit concerned about my blood test results since they show a decline in fertility (although I ovulated last month and my progesterone was great). We want to get #1 on the way as soon as possible!
I'm in New York in the USA. I used to live in the UK, but I'm from the US originally. We're in the same time zone!
Sending oodles of baby dust your way!
Sat May 21, 2016 1:26 pm
It's great news that you have say in when you will be away. It is hard to miss the fertile days when you are set on trying. Hopefully you will get your bfp this cycle and next months days won't be needed.
I am having a pretty content day with slightly less obsessing. Although I am hoping to get pregnant ASAP I know that statistically it takes time.
Not many symptoms today except about four times I have felt hot all of the sudden and that isn't normal. I had an afternoon temp of 99. It would be nice if it was pregnancy related but who knows. I had the thermometer handy since I plan to start tracking bbt but I don't usualy take my temp to have anything to compare it to. It is far from a hot day though. I am sure you have this same cool wet weather we are having .
Have you shared with family or friends that you are trying for a little one?
Sat May 21, 2016 4:00 pm
Scrpbookr, a raised temperature is a good sign. Hopefully it stays that way! When is AF due? It must be hard during the TWW because there are so many conflicting signs of pregnancy -- and many of them are the same as before AF. I tend to over interpret anyway so I'm sure I'll be analyzing every cramp, twinge, and sensitivity. I'm not looking forward to that phase.
We haven't told most people that we're TTC. I discussed it with my mom so that I could have some help with lab results and get some information about family fertility etc. We haven't told my husband's family. They live locally and we know that if we told them they would start asking EVERY day what's happening. Its challenging enough that people keep making subtle and not-so-subtle hints about us having kids. We don't want more pressure. If we get a BFP, we'll probably wait a bit before we tell our families. We'll probably do it before month 3 but maybe wait 6-8 weeks or so to be sure that its going to work out.
What about you? Does your family know?
Sat May 21, 2016 5:24 pm
Hi Crumpet, Like you I have told my Mom. My husband and I discussed with our almost 9 year old awhile ago but I don't bring it up with him much. My husband is, of course, actively involved but I try not to drown him in details.
We didn't tell anyone when we tried for our son and then waited until around 12 weeks along to share with most. That was helpful when we had a couple of miscarriages. It was easier not to have to tell several others of the losses.
What type of fertility blood tests did you take and what did you find out? haven't gone that route yet but it interests me.
What type of work do you do? Will you continue after you have a baby?
Sat May 21, 2016 5:28 pm
And AF is due this Mon if I stay on a 24 day cycle. We bd days 7 through 12 with preseed. With a 24 day cycle I should have o'ed on day 10. I didn't chart or use OPKs this month though. I did have ewcm though
Sun May 22, 2016 7:22 am
Scrpbookr, wow, just one more day of waiting! Are you fairly regular? Either way, it sounds like you could test on Monday. Its good just to know and have the wait over!
It sounds like you handled your son well. Its good to implant the possibility so that he's prepared for it. He's at an age where he'll actually remember the pregnancy, which is really quite cool!
I took a few blood tests. FSH is quite important but also variable. Mine was 11.1, which is high but not terrible. I think its okay given my age but it would have been better to see something under 10. I also had progesterone and mine was great for April and it also showed that I did ovulate. I has AMH and estradiol done as well. AMH was again not red-hot but I think normal for my age. Estradiol was good. My doctor did a brief interpretation of these for me when I got them (Wednesday last week). We're meeting on Thursday this coming week to discuss them and our pregnancy plans. I'm really eager for the meeting, particularly as I was a bit concerned by my AMH. My doctor told me that conception is an art not a science but that the readings can give us some clues. I think she's right. They can give you the suggestion of possible problems and I think that's helpful to know. They can also be helpful for sorting out what oral meds and supplements might be helpful. I'm really glad I had these done. DH is getting his sperm tested soon too, just to be sure. He's 34, which reduces age complication.
We're planning to BD every day for the particularly fertile days of my fertile window and every other day for the less fertile days. We're also using preseed. We're really hoping it works this time!
I'm a professor at a University. I will work after the baby. We're lucky to have flexible schedules even though we work long hours. One of my colleagues was even able to teach online during her first term with her new baby, which meant that she could work from home.
Do you work? Will a new baby change your work patterns?
Sun May 22, 2016 8:05 am
Good Morning, Crumpet, Yes...just about one more day of waiting. I temped again this morning at 98.3 which was the same as yesterday morning. It seems like a nice, high end of luteal phase temp. If AF is coming it will begin to drop soon. I am hoping for a rise though. My last few cycles have been 24 days so we will see if I am consistent with that this month. If the cycle is lengthened past 27 we may have missed. My son and I left for a scout camp out the 13th/14th days of the cycle. This is where the charting and OPKs will be helpful for pinpointing ovulation. Going into this past month extra bding was more appealing than temping/testing though. But now, in hindsight, it would be nice to refer back and know just when ovulation took place.
I take care of the Human Resources and payroll for an Independent School. With my son I stayed home with him until he was 3 1/2. At that time we both were able to join the school community where we are now. It is a pre-school through 12th grade private school. I really value what we have there so aside from a maternity leave I plan to continue working this time. I will have to find a good place for baby through 3 years and then they can join us at school. Does your university have a child are option? I know that many do.
Are you doing anything special as far as diet or supplements?
Sun May 22, 2016 8:32 am
Good morning! Well, a high temperature is good news. I know I wouldn't want to get my hopes up until its possible to test but its nice to see positive signs. I am sure I'll be driving myself (and maybe my husband!) crazy when I'm in the TWW. Do you have some tests ready for tomorrow? From what I've heard, some people test negative and then later test positive, even if they wait until a missed first day of AF.
I've been tracking everything in a free iPhone ap called Ovia. I got it last week and I *love* it. You can record your temperature, CM, pains and twinges, mood, food, beverages, supplements etc in it. Based on my calendar, my most fertile day is Tuesday. It will be interesting to see if it correlates with OPKs or not. I have some arriving on Monday, but I'm not sure if I'll use them (its a bit later in my cycle than recommended, but I'd be interested). Supposedly it gets much more accurate the more data you enter (which makes sense).
I was taking multi-vitamins for women and just ran out about a week or 10 days ago. I've decided to wait until my OB/GYN appointment on Thursday to see what she recommends. Sometimes they will prescribe specific prenatal vitamins if you have bloodwork done. Other than that, I've made a few modifications to my diet and drinking. I used to have a single glass of red wine a fair few nights a week. I've cut that out, but I may have one the first day of AF. Somehow its easier just to not drink than to reduce it. I'm also making sure that I have no more than one cup of caffeinated tea each morning. I switch to herbal tea and water for the rest of the day. We're pretty healthy eaters and cook most of our meals from scratch. I'm working in a few more leafy greens but otherwise the same. I'm a big runner and decided not to sign up for a marathon this year. I'll still run and do shorter races though.
Are you taking any supplements or making any modifications to diet and drinking?
My University does not have child care, which is unfortunate. We are very lucky to have my husband's family nearby. Between them and my flexible schedule, I think/hope we'll be in a good situation. Do you have family nearby to help?
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