Is in vitro fertilization helping you achieve your dream of parenthood? Discuss IVF, FET, donor egg and surrogacy here!
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:26 am
carrie- they told me it was recommended but optional since it wasn't covered by the study. All of a sudden they made it mandatory. Apparently they'll let me go forward without it after they already guilt tripped me.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:28 am
Hey everyone... just got home from the hospital. D & C went well and physically I'm ok. Not cramping, just bleeding. Mentally, that's another story. Thank you for all of your kind words and for making this such a warm place that we can all go to for comfort from those who understand best.
I am in a state of shock, sadness, anger, sadness... this is truly testing my faith further than ever. My RE says they will do genetic testing on the fetus... results take about 3 - 4 weeks. More knowledge - and knowledge is power. So, we'll wait to see what we find out.
If it was just a fluke thing, we'll probably try one more round of IVF in January. But, honestly, I'm not even sure how much my heart can take.
Why... why... why. Thank you for your support friends. My heart goes out to everyone else struggling today -- what is UP with us?! We desperately need some good news on this board.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:37 am
Jenny - I'm so sorry for your pain & heartache. I am gutted for you
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:41 am
Jenny- It is not fair! Im glad you came back here to let us all know that you are ok, even if it is just physically. I never in a million years expected that sort of news!
Please stick around if you can and want to..We are no longer just a group of people who are going through the same thing, we are friends!
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:41 am
Jenny we are always here for you hun. If you need anything let us know. I'm so very sorry and I hope you find the strength to continue trying. Again, my thoughts and prayers are with your family.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 8:50 am
I was trying to catch up with everyone last night, when I started crying, particularly after Jenny's post, and my husband took the computer away from me saying I didn't need to be reading that stuff and upsetting myself. I just feel so terrible for us all right now.
Jenny - my heart ached so much when I read your post. I know others have been in similar situations, but I was the same as you. 9wk u/s, expecting everything to be fine, then bam! No h/b. You just don't expect it. Then to have to go into surgery to top it all off. I am so sorry, Jenny. All the dreams you made, birthday parties you started planning... It's so hard to let go. I remember being so mad that I was still feeling pg symptoms even after the baby was gone. You are a wonderful, strong person, and I really hope they do some extensive testing to see why this happened to help increase your chances of success next time. And I really hope there is a next time. Have a nice glass of wine tonight (or three). You and DH will get through this.
stboom - I'm so sorry for the news of your chemical. That was my IVF outcome, too! It hurts to know you came so close, doesn't it? I hope they do some testing and find something out to help you.
Mere - I'm sure hearing the negative phone call was difficult. After reading through pages of posts, I really have to admire your determination. People like you are rare. I'm so glad that you are going to continue and that you're doing everything you can to make it work!
Crunchy - they sound kind of nutty over there at that clinic! I really hope the "wellness" hysteroscopy works for you and that you get it covered.
Carrie - I really hope the cramps ease for you today. Adds insult to injury, doesn't it? I'm so sorry for you.
Jules - praying for you, honey! And you're allowed to break down. We're human, and this is such a trying time for all of us.
Quinn - I am praying your little embies make it through PGD and they are both healthy. I can't wait to hear the results.
Heath - I can't believe your beta is at 17DPO! That seems so far away. I guess you would definitely know by then!
Lorrie - thinking of you! Your beta does seem really far away as well! Why do they make us wait so long???
Mere - can you add me to the Lupron section of the front page? Thank, babe! Thanks so much for organizing all of us and starting the new thread.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 9:10 am
Carrie- The nurse told me yesterday it will be a heavy AF. Im not looking foward do it. Supid hormones thickening our lining for nothing. I dont want mine to come. Maybe I'll just stay on the pIO forever until im ready to start again. I cant belive your bleeding so bad. Im scared now. NO complain about cramps. You had a failed cycle. You have a right to complain. Your hurting too. It is just a reminder of what didnt happen. it's hurtful and now you have to suffer not having a baby and in pain. There is nothing good about it. It's like being punished some more You got that right. we are friend.
Crunchy- I hope your insurance will just pay for it and you can get it done. There is always something isnt there.
Jenny- The good thing about a d&c is that you dont need to have AF cause they take it all away. Less stress. Im so glad you will have testing done. Best thing I ever done. Once my came back as nothing wrong I knew it was me. I hope you can heal soon. But deep down I know you'll never get over it. Mine has been a year and I still miss my little boy. Maybe if i had a child it would be easier But I feel that was the only one i was suppose to have. I hope you get some answers. Im so sorry.
Pam- Yep. I will not give up. It is not over until I reach menapause. I will find a way somehow. Now sure the path yet but I will get there and see what I can do to make it happen. lupron already. Wow this is going fast for you.
So what kind of new name do you want? Do you girls want to move to the buddy group side soon? we dont have many left until everyone has gone through it. So lets here some suggestions.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:03 am
OMG!!! what is going on?
Crunchy, what are these people doing to you? I really hope that your one embie makes it. I am sorry about your accident. I can't imagine living with that fear. Sorry you feel so sad that you wish for death. It is understandable but I know you survived for a purpose
Quinn, hun, so sorry. 2 is such a small number to work with considerning that you are doing PGD. but hopefully the two will be the troopers- all we can do is keep hoping- this is too much.
Jenny what more can I say to you gal? how can you come so close so many times? All I can do is pray.
Jules honey- so sorry, I wish we would fast forward and let be a positive for you. For you and for all of us here. Lets not give up hope for you yet. Maybe it was still early. They looked so great my goodness!!!
Carrie sorry about the cramps, of course that is last nail in the coffin- it such a empty feeling
I just returned from the F/U with the doctor. I will share with you later because now I just feel overwhelmed by what is happening to our friends here.
My love to all you
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:06 am
ladies what the heck is going on?
I'm just so sad yesterday and today for all of you hurting. Its just not fair!
Jenny - My heart and prayeres go out to you. I have no words. I can't even imagine the kind of pain you're going through. I'm just so sorry and so sad for you and your DH. You've been through too much! I just want to cry.
Jules - So sorry for your bfn today
. praying it changes for you!! Huge hugs to you!
Carrie - Sorry for the miserable AF/cramps. You're not whining either. You're entitled too! Let it all out girl!
Pam - I'd say yay for Lupron but I'm so sorry you have to go through it all again. So not fair...i keep saying that, don't I??
Mere - you made a funny with the menapuase comment
NEVER give up!!!! You will get there! Kwam is the voice of reason and gave you the perfect advice yesterday. As for names, I'm awful with names...but hmmm, let me think (although this headache is making it hard for me to think)
Lorries/Heath - I hope you're both hanging in there in the TWW!!
Crunchy - my goodness, what a place! that would seriously piss me off. How dare they! Then have the balls to guilt you into afterwards. Sounds very fishy to me.
Quinn - praying for your 2 embies
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:18 am
My home modem literally just died as I was doing a post and I was on the phone with verizon for hours and they think I need a new modem. I am stealing from a store but the connection goes in and out i have to be quick.
crunchy we were able to get my hysteroscopy covered by coding it as "Irregular menstrual" rather than "Conception management" or anything with the word fertility. we actually just found out yesterday that they covered it, it was $850. Here i thought things were looking up yesterday. stupid me.
Has anyone looked into ARC which lets you buy 2 or 3 tries at a time and then if they all fail you get your money back? I am sure it is very very expensive but i am not sure if it is a good idea for us to keep going one cycle at a time so I am trying to look into it.
hang in there everyone.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:35 am
Quinn: I am praying for your two embies!!
Where is ARC?, that is exactly what I am looking for, at my age I might need some more try's!!
Cruncy: my beta is friday.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:42 am
http://www.arcfertility.com/about_arc/A ... _list.html
My clinic is listed under PA.. jules i dont see any under TN for some reason.
They offer packages where you pay up front a lot and then you get a certain amt of tries.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:45 am
Tue Oct 06, 2009 10:58 am
Wanted to stop by and say hi to everyone.
I am thinking of everyone and praying for us all...things just have gone from bad to worse now we know we can only go up from here thats what I think.
Mere: I agree on a new thread with a new name. Maybe the b/g side is the place to post it to since we have all become buddies now so we can stay together as we venture on.
Jenny: My heart is still aching for you. I hope you find strength and peace.
Tue Oct 06, 2009 11:01 am
My clinic isn't an ARC clinic, but I think I've mentioned before, they do have a "three for the price of two" deal. We are signing up for it this time. We didn't sign up last time because we thought our odds were too good...
I can send anyone the info if they want, but for us, because we're doing IVF w/ICSI, it costs $20,300 for three tries. They have to be within a year(I think) and you get about 50% back if you stop after the first try, but none back if you stop after two tries... Although the third is the free one so I don't know why you would stop before!
It doesn't help, obviously, with all the other fees involved - hotel, food, airfare, u/s's before going to the clinic, drugs, etc. I would say three more tries would likely cost $50,000 all together (for us, since we have to travel to get to the clinic and stay in a hotel for two weeks!).
I'll tell you all, it's a darn good thing we moved to Bermuda. With no insurance coverage, the high and tax-free Bermuda wages have allowed us to be able to afford this. We would never have been able to if we still lived in Winnipeg. Everything happens for a reason!
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