Trying to Conceive Forum

by **Speedofpain** » Thu Aug 20, 2015 2:27 pm

Faith: Yes I am so excited! I am such a dork when they called to confirm my apt I was too excited haha. The nurse was telling me I can print the forms online and I quickly cut her off with I already did. lol She could tell I was excited. She was excited for me when she told me my copay was $15. She said most people pay $595. SO I am super excited about that too. I am not nervous today like I have been. I am just excited this is happening!!! You'd think they were handing out babies at this place on how I can't wait for tomorrow. My 12 yro Niece is in town too so I have the whole day off tomorrow yippee! I am so glad you get to start the meds. Taking a deep breath is good. I know how overwhelming the meds are when you are in the cycle but I promise you you'll look back and think..." That was a breeze" after only two cycles of meds I felt like a pro. I didn't really get any side effects besides the 1st trigger shot got hot flashes, upset stomach, that was not fun but absolutely no side effects second go round so I guess it depends. I am hoping you have no problems as well. I agree with you I feel like lets get this moving (for you as well). I will keep sending you my positive vibes and sweet thoughts that this it. I want to see that BFP for you again real soon! Woohoo! I am obviously in a super good mood. I can't wait to hear how the first shots went! Keep positive girly!!!!

by **Galai** » Thu Aug 20, 2015 5:17 pm

Faith-Good luck with starting your meds!! Fx for you with IVF cycle!!

Speed-I am so excited for you!! You are too cute!! Hope all goes well at the Drs!! Can't what to hear about it!! Fx for you too!!

by **Charlotte418** » Sat Aug 22, 2015 1:24 am

@faithkeepsmegoing- yay to starting the meds!! I know its a little while til transfer, you must be so excited!

Have you decided if you'll transfer one or two? I thought I'd never transfer two (risks), but after putting back one in my fresh cycle in May and getting a BFN, I was ready to try two to increase my odds. With the two frozen transfer, one stuck, which was the desired/ideal outcome. High risk pregnancy is tough to wrap the head around. I did not want twins specifically, but after suffering from infertility I would've welcomed the possibility. My husband would've been so so happy with twins, lol, but I told him not to be greedy! I am not under an illusions that would be easy. Not sure how you feel about it. You have plenty of time to think about it.

@Speedofpain- How did your Dr appt go? It is so nice to see how excited you are, I hope that you can get started soon and take good care of yourself. Let us know how you are doing. Thinking of you :goodluck1:

by **faithkeepsmegoing** » Mon Aug 24, 2015 8:35 am

@charlotte – That’s what I keep struggling with, I’m with you on this one. My fiancée would love to transfer 2, he obviously feels we’ll have a better outcome but I really don’t want twins. I just want my ONE, that’s it, only ONE! Lol Since I got pregnant in May, I’m thinking maybe I’m still somewhat fertile and I’ll have a better chance of my embie implanting. I dunno, I could be totally wrong but this 1st time around, I think I’m gonna stick to 1, maybe that’s all I’ll need. My RE insists on it too, I’m 33 so, he feels I’m young and will have a great outcome, I’m praying that’s the case. I’m planning on freezing the rest, hopefully we get a nice batch because I have low ovarian reserve so, I know for a fact I want more than 1 child so, it’s best for me to invest in freezing them now rather than waiting till I’m older and have even more trouble with my eggs. Ugggggg, it’s so draining, just wish I was normal sometimes but I know there’s a lot of us out there so, I need to remain positive.

@speed how did ur appt go?

by **Speedofpain** » Wed Aug 26, 2015 11:39 am

Sorry ladies its been one crazy week! I started classes again to keep my mind busy but working 6 days a week and college part time...with fertility doctors I feel like I am always busy! :rofl:

To all my ladies: High Risk apt went well.

It went how I expected but I am not complaining. I can't try until my A1C is below 6..(which I knew) but that shouldn't be too bad since it was 6.3. So probably 3-6 months or so but I am ok with that if it means a greater chance of keeping the little fella and having a healthy pregnancy! They had me do all kinds of testing (again) freakin vampires I swear. They also had me do a 24hr urine sample to test my kidneys to make sure they can hold a pregnancy. I don't know if you ladies have ever done that but...(WARNING NO FILTER) it was so weird. Basically you have to pee in a bucket all day. Its not really a bucket but for my uncomfortable self it was an effin bucket haha. So I had to drop that off at the lab.. how fun was that? Well you can imagine walking in at 6 am like here I have 24 hrs worth of pee for you. It didn't go exactly like that but that's how it felt. Like everyone knew I had pee in my paper bag haha. Of course I am dramatic but that was the excitement of my weekend. I have a follow up on Sept 8th to go over my labs and see where we go from there. They have me taking Metformin again the extended release..I was supposed to start that but it hurts my tummy so I didn't want to take it my first two nights of class so I will start it tonight. She also has me taking rx strength folic acid and a bunch of supplements. Makes me wish I was straight and fertile. Seems like this whole process would be easier. :rofl:

Galai: How you feeling? How's the little guy?

Charlotte: Thank you for thinking of me and the well wishes! How you doing?

Faith: I agree with you. It is a lot to think about to transfer two. I would go with your gut. If you only want to transfer one then do just that. My wife and I have been back and forth about what we would do if it were multiples. We have both agreed twins is definitely our limit and even then we would really have to discuss the risk with our doctor especially with my diabetes to make sure they BOTH can have a great outcome. I think you are right, after getting you BFP recently I believe one of you little beans should give you a great chance of another BFP! I am rooting for you? Hows the Lupron injections going? Are you not just going stir crazy waiting for the 28th? I feel like I am going crazy waiting to for you to go haha I just want to find out already when you get to transfer haha.

Alright sorry it was a long one ladies! Can't wait to see how all of you are doing! Its a great day isn't it? Hope all is well! :yay:

by **Charlotte418** » Thu Aug 27, 2015 6:59 pm

Hey speedofpain!!! Wow, it sounds like you are super busy, but you are doing a great job of dealing with the chaos. It sounds like they have a plan so that's good! LOL you had me cracking up about the 24 hour urine collection. My husband had to do that after his kidney surgeries... I know how crazy all the tests feel. I am doing OK. Had a bad day today. Someone hit my (brand new, 3 weeks I've had it) car when it was parked. I wasn't even in it. I started and ended summer with car drama! I got their info and all, and I am handling it but it's just not what I needed right now. I am nervous and excited for my scan on Monday 8/31. It will be the 8 week scan, praying everything is progressing as expected. It was so good to hear from you, glad you are doing well.

@ faith- yeah, do what is comfortable for you. Follow your heart, you can always freeze them and use them for the future

by **Speedofpain** » Fri Aug 28, 2015 8:46 am

Charlotte: Oh no I am so sorry about your car. I know how much a bummer that is. I am glad you weren't in it thankfully, but still what a shitty way to end your summer. Hoping for a great scan on Monday. Can't wait to hear all the deets! Hope your day is better today

by **Charlotte418** » Mon Aug 31, 2015 5:48 am

Thanks, speedofpain! Thank you for sympathizing about the car thing. I am feeling OK about that now since it will get fixed in time and the shock that it happened is gone lol.

Everything went well at my scan today. We got to see the baby again and so now we've graduated to a regular OB which I have an appointment with on 9/15. I am so excited, I can't wait to be able to tell my family. I am waiting until 12 weeks, which will be 9/25... None of them know any of what I have gone through. I am so private about it. While it was hard keeping it to myself at times, I'm still glad I did. I don't know what I would do without this forum and support when I kept getting negatives again and again. I am feeling very grateful.

How is everyone doing? Faith, how are you, lady? Hows the IVF going?

by **Speedofpain** » Mon Aug 31, 2015 8:29 am

Charlotte: Yay for graduating! How exciting!!!! Oh goodness that's going to be so great when you can tell everyone! Just a little less than a month away!! Wow time was going by so slow and it seems to be moving so quickly now. I can't believe you will be in your second trimester at the end of next month already! As for me my doctor called me the very next day after my blood work...My Vitamin D was super low so she upped it to 5000 iui from 1000 on top of all the supplements she gave me. I finally started the metformin again so we will see how it goes...so far its been ok. Good luck in the coming few weeks can't wait to hear all about it!

Faith: How you doing? Did you start the stims over the weekend?

by **faithkeepsmegoing** » Mon Aug 31, 2015 12:07 pm

Hi ladies,

I had my baseline ultrasound on Friday morning and I don’t know why I was freaking out about it. I’ve never had cysts show up on the ultrasounds before but I was just feeling like anything can fall apart at any moment. I got myself out of that funk real quick one I heard the news that I was free and clear to move forward with stims on Saturday night. I’m taking 225 of Follistom, 75 menopur and 5 units of Lupron my counter at home looked crazy when I set them all up lol. The first day everything was pretty smooth, didn’t really hurt but last nights was bad. The menopur burned like a b8tch, I’m guessing I didn’t ice the injection site enough. It was fine after a few seconds but it was a killer as I was putting it in. Other than that, no side effects yet and hopefully it stays that way but it’s only been two days. I go back for another ultrasound this wed to see how things are coming along. It’s so crazy I’m in the midst of all of this, I never saw myself going through this but then again who does!

@charlotte how exciting!!! I cant believe you’ll be 12 weeks at the end of sept, that went by quick. I should be finding out right around that time if my 1st ivf worked, god I hope it does but atleast I know I still have options if it doesn’t. I’m totally with you on being private, my family knows we’ve had trouble trying and about the IUI’s but they don’t know we’ve already started ivf. After the loss I had in June I think everyone just figures we’ll take a lil break which works perfectly cause I cant deal with the stress of them asking me every second if I’m pregnant again. This way, if I get my bfp it will be an amazing surprise and if not then we’ll keep trying under the radar until it happens.

@speed I’m hoping time flies by for you too so, you can get on track of things. Atleast ur busy which is good! Sorry to hear about the pee bag lol but atleast you got that over with. Not sure if this is too personal but has ur wife thought about going first since you have to wait awhile to start? You’re really young so you have a lot of time so I was just wondering. Oh and how is the metformin going? Did u start it yet?

by **Speedofpain** » Tue Sep 01, 2015 9:47 am

Faith: Yay I am so excited things are going well! I never had the burning from menopur but I never iced it either though. I can't wait to hear how they are growing on wed! Yay! What trigger shot did they giver you?

As for my wife...she doesn't want to carry

Which is ok its her choice I would never force her to do anything. I did hear her tell a close friend if it came down to it and I absolutely couldn't carry she would, she would do anything for me. She doesn't know I know that but I am glad it is an option. She never wanted to be pregnant but always wanted children. She's great with them. I just think she figured her partner would carry. My wife is definitely one of those ladies who has been gay since her first crush in Pre-K lol. I know this sounds stereotypical but my wife and I are both very very girly so its not like she doesn't want to carry cause she thinks she is a "boy" or anything she just doesn't think it fits her. She also told me that now she definitely doesn't want to carry, because she thinks I would resent her and hate my child or something....which I find ridiculous but it does make sense in a way, because I want to carry so bad. My wife is a little older...30, not old by any means, but she just doesn't think it's in her cards. I told her though, I am only doing this my 6 covered IUI's, if it doesn't work, she's up. I really rather not adopt. I know that sounds awful but thinking of adopting makes me feel ubber guilty. I just don't see how I could save one child's life and fear that the child we didn't pick would grow up in a horrible home. I know it sounds confusing and quite ridiculous but I can't imagine having to "pick" a child to call my own. But all in all I remain hopeful that there is a bigger plan out their for me and my guardian angel will send me a beautiful child to carry and call my own. On one hand its a great thing that I am still young and have options on the other hand I am terrified that everything I am going through now will only be 10x harder if I wait any longer. Ahh the beauties of fertility treatment am I right?

by **Charlotte418** » Tue Sep 01, 2015 2:42 pm

@Speedofpain- I know, time is finally speeding up a bit. I'm glad you don't think 30 is too old, lol, cause I am turning 30 on Labor Day. We had been trying since I was 28. You and your wife sound so cute. That is true love making sacrifices. I don't think its weird at all to feel unnatural about picking a kid out. I think that you are doing all of the right things and taking the right steps. Most of all you are looking out for your health. That is the most important thing. I believe that you will be rewarded in time for your strength and diligence.

@Faith- yay to starting the stims!!! I had the same burning thing a couple of times with Menopur. You have to apply a lot of pressure with the ice pack too, like lay weight on it and for at least 15-20 mins if possible. I can't wait to hear about everything. I hope everything goes smoothly. I am praying for you that your first transfer does it! Your plan sounds wise. I love people not knowing. It was a little hard when my first transfer didn't work, being sad to myself... but knowing there were other embryos was comforting.

by **Sammich** » Wed Sep 02, 2015 9:35 am

Ladies! I feel like I haven't talked to you guys forever! Sorry I have been gone for so long. I recently was promoted and went on vacation, however my wife had lost her job and finally started a temporary one as of yesterday... So it has been a little hectic. However! Our baby is still growing and healthy! My wife will officially be 12 weeks as of tomorrow, which she is very excited for because she has been having really bad morning sickness. We officially "graduated" from the fertility doctor on 7/30! We haven't been to our regular doctor since then. Our next appointment is next Tuesday, and I am so excited to see how big our little bean has grown! Enough about us!

@charlotte - Congratulations! How very exciting for you!

@galai - Your little boy looked beautiful in that US! Congrats again!

@speed & faith - I am happy that things are moving forward for the both of you! Keep your heads up and your hearts strong!

by **Speedofpain** » Wed Sep 02, 2015 12:34 pm

Charlotte: Thank you for your kind words! *hugs* Today is tough. Today is one of those days when I feel like its not enough. :/ I am struggling with " this is all for nothing" bullcrap today. I feel like I am stuck. I know this is all untrue and that I am doing everything I can to prepare my body for a healthy baby...but I just want don't want to do it. Two pregnancy announcements on facebook today made me want to punch someone lol. Close friends too. Super excited for them first time for both so I am overjoyed for them...but a reminder still its not my turn. I feel like singing part of your world from the little mermaid "When's it my turn..wouldn't I love" haha you get the picture. lol. Tomorrow is a new day and I am sure it will be great..but today I want to say f*** it! lol :rofl:

Sammich: So good to hear from you! Oh my can't believe twelve weeks already! SO exciting!!! Glad to see you guys are doing better! Can't wait to hear about the ultrasound be sure to let us know! :wink:

by **Charlotte418** » Wed Sep 02, 2015 1:41 pm

@Speedofpain- I love that you referenced the little mermaid, I loved that movie! I wanna watch it now... But that longing/yearning feeling is tough, I know what you mean about the Facebook posts. I had a period from March to like June where I simply wouldn't go on FB. If someone had baby news I would just hide their posts (they won't know and its not like your de-friending them, lol) It is easier for me to be happy for newly pregnant ladies on this forum and the IVF forum because I know how much they have struggled (maybe that makes me a crappy person but everyone else seems like ungrateful whinners). I hate that it seems so much easier for everyone else and then they go and post complaints all over social media like "darn baby's keeping me awake all night, so tired." (No sh*t, get a diary lol) Being a mother is not easy but that's not really breaking news. These people have no idea that someone could be reading this wishing they had a screaming kid to wake them up. Too many people use their status as like a coping strategy. I think its better for these people to write a blog or pick up the phone and call a friend. The people that post the most personal garbage on there are usually quiet introverted people you'd ever meet. I could go on all day about FB! lol Anyway, we call Facebook, "Babybook" because that is really all that's on there now that we've entered this age bracket.

@Sammich- How nice to hear from you!!! Thank you and I am excited for you and your wife. I always wonder how everyone is. Sorry about the job thing but that's good that she's got another for now and Congrats on your promotion!