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Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2015 9:49 pm
by Stormtrooper0513
My wife and I are TTC. We are a lesbian couple and we both tend to enjoy the adult beverages. Since we began TTC, she has stopped drinking and we recently just did our first IUI. We are here in our TWW and very anxious. However, I feel as though with her hormones acting up, it's much easier for me to preform as a loving a dutiful wife if I have a cocktail or two. Is it awful of me to crave alcohol to get through these stressful parts even though she must abstain?

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Thu Nov 05, 2015 3:03 pm
by Rebeccam14
I don't think so. My hubby has a drink or two in the evening during the weekend to relax.
Best of luck to you two. Keeping my fingers crossed for a bfp.

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2015 5:18 am
by CloverQueen
Personally, I would want my partner to abstain during the IUI. Or at least refrain while I am around. During pregnancy,I dont see a problem with it, but during this stressful time i would want my partner to be on the same page as what I am going through. Ultimately, it all depends on how your partner feels, if she seems fine and doesnt mind, then go for it!

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2015 6:21 am
by Rebeccam14
You're right it really just depends on how she feels about you having a drink.

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Fri Nov 06, 2015 9:29 pm
by JenJill15
Hi stormtrooper!
We are a lesbian couple too! I'm doing the IUI and my wife is a little clueless so the fact that you're on these boards is VERY impressive! Lol my wife and I discussed the drinking and I think every couple is different, but I tell her to enjoy! She works really hard and having some wine is well deserved. She's with me at every appointment so that's all I ask for!
We're planning to do our first IUI this month too! We just got married last month :) good luck and keep us all posted!!!

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 12:16 pm
by Stormtrooper0513
Thank you everyone! I was feeling bad for even thinking that I really wanted a drink or two, especially to fall asleep. But I keep it low key and don't advertise in front of my wife. Things are going well, just waiting for Friday the 13th for our PT. Fingera crossed!!!

JenJill- congrats on our recent marriage! We got married in September and decided to jump right into making a family. Good luck with your IUI!!!
I actually came to a realization recently that I have to keep in mind. As a lesbian couple, most of the things my wife goes through emotionally, physically and understanding the female hormones, I can always relate to my wife. Now that her body is going through this IUI process and all the appointments, her being poked a s prodded and filled with extra hormones, it's literally the only thing as a woman that I cannot relate to my wife about. I have never felt any of the the things she is feeling and I won't be able to ever fully understand until I go through it myself. So I try to be as patient and calm as possible. She's doing something amazing for our future family and I have to just be supportive. It sucks not being about to relate to her, as I am used to. But we are cruising right along!!!!!

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Sat Nov 07, 2015 1:03 pm
by JenJill15
Thank you storm!
Congrats on your recent marriage too! We definitely jumped right in too!
I totally agree. As lesbians we have a totally different understanding of our partners. as much as my wife is left out of how I'm feeling right now, your wife and I have to keep in mind how difficult it is for you guys to go through it without actually being the one to have the baby. I'm sure it's incredibly difficult to be on the other side, but I won't know what that's like either! It's definitely going to make us stronger!
When is your Tww over? We are only at cd11 so we're still about a few days from the IUI. How is your wife feeling? Any crazy symptoms?

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 3:06 pm
by Tabby0418
My husband and I normally drink together, after an IUI I don't drink (actually I will have ONE beer the first couple days, but then nothing after that...helps with initial stress...I know I shouldn't though). I do personally get crazy p o'ed when my husband drinks more then 1 drink after that, seriously if I can't...then he can't hahaha.

But really, I would either drink when she isn't around...OR just ask her. Better to be open about it and explain reasoning rather then stressing yourself on if she is upset you are drinking.

Best of luck to you both!!

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2015 11:27 am
by Stormtrooper0513
JenJill-
We take our PT on Friday! Super excited and nervous. She has had some symptoms. Lots of cramping, mood swings, body aches. It's definitely been a change. She is very sensitive to everything so she feels it all. I try to be as supportive and loving as possible. Easier sometimes than others.
Good luck with your IUI and I truly hope the doctor does NOT have to use that damn tenaculum! I hope it's quick and easy for you :)

Re: Me drink while wife IUI?

PostPosted: Wed Nov 11, 2015 1:58 pm
by JenJill15
Storm trooper!!! That's so effing exciting!!! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE post what happens! 2 days away is so awesome. You guys have a lot of self control to not test earlier... Good luck!!! FX!!!