think ttc is making me a bad mom

Having trouble getting pregnant the second time around? Find support here.

Moderators: unaffected, JessM, southernbelle, maddy

think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby loveandmarriage » Sat Mar 30, 2013 12:26 pm

I feel like I am being consumed by ttc and my DD is suffering. I am going crazy and have been physically and emotionally exhausted and not as active as normal. Has anyone else felt this way? What can I do about it? Hopefully things will get better. I am going to the doc on the 12th and depending on what she says I may bewn finished ttc. After 5 1/2 years of unptotected sex I just don't know what to do.

Any advice would be helpful.
Me: 26
DH: 28
Together since October 2006
Married since August 2008
TTC #2 since October 2008


ME
Lab work 4/12: hormone levels and thyroid are good.
u/s 4/29: microscopic cysts on both ovaries. Another u/s in August to ensure cysts have not grown.
HSG 6/19: no blockage everything good
Gyno 7/8-vaginal u/s and clomid prescribed
+hpt 7/15-never taking hpts again. They are inaccurate.
-beta 7/19- HCG 0.
8/14: start Clomid 50mg CD3-7
9/1: Blood work to check progesterone levels


DH
Urologist 5/20
SA 6/12-Count 97 million, motility good, morphology 2.5%
Urologist 7/1: complete sa results, IUI suggested



ImageMy Ovulation Chart

Image

Image
User avatar
loveandmarriage
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 846
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2012 12:49 pm
Location: Weston, WV

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby ambernicole8484 » Wed Apr 03, 2013 2:26 pm

I can completely relate to what you are going through. My DD is 9 years old and DH and I have been unprotected since she turned six months old. My obsession with TTC only began 2 years ago. Since I've gotten baby crazy I've felt the same way with my DD. I've gotten so depressed that I don't have the energy or desire to do the things I should be doing with my DD. However, lately I've been makin more of an effort to be more involved. It's not easy. I force myself every day. After you have your visit with your doctor you'll be able to determine if you are going to continue or not. I've been getting help, and continue to do so, for the past year. I realize this probably isn't the most helpful response, bit I wanted to let you know you are not alone. I hope you're able to get some answers during your visit.
Me 30 ~ DH 31 ~ DD 11 - DS 12/5/14

BFP ~ 4/2/14 <3

10 years and 11 months after our sweet baby girl, our sweet baby boy arrived <3

Blog <3
http://eatingmyselfpregnant.blogspot.com/
ambernicole8484
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 4367
Joined: Wed Aug 24, 2011 12:00 am
Location: Kentucky

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby loveandmarriage » Sun Apr 14, 2013 9:42 am

Thank you. Sorry just seen your reply. Insurance doesn't cover anything so she doesn't want to see me back until all scheduled tests. I won't know anything until May 21 when I go back cause couldn't get DH in for a SA until May 20. I have been making a big effort too. It sounds bad but I've been puttong on a smile and going with her to ride her bike, coloring more, etc. Think that's all I can do. And I'm really making an effort. Glad I'm not the only one who ever feels this way.
Me: 26
DH: 28
Together since October 2006
Married since August 2008
TTC #2 since October 2008


ME
Lab work 4/12: hormone levels and thyroid are good.
u/s 4/29: microscopic cysts on both ovaries. Another u/s in August to ensure cysts have not grown.
HSG 6/19: no blockage everything good
Gyno 7/8-vaginal u/s and clomid prescribed
+hpt 7/15-never taking hpts again. They are inaccurate.
-beta 7/19- HCG 0.
8/14: start Clomid 50mg CD3-7
9/1: Blood work to check progesterone levels


DH
Urologist 5/20
SA 6/12-Count 97 million, motility good, morphology 2.5%
Urologist 7/1: complete sa results, IUI suggested



ImageMy Ovulation Chart

Image

Image
User avatar
loveandmarriage
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 846
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2012 12:49 pm
Location: Weston, WV

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby ambernicole8484 » Wed Apr 17, 2013 7:56 am

Our insurance doesn't cover anything either so we're having to do this slowly, and with an with my gyno. He's great and doing all he can to help us while keeping the cost down, but during my last visit he mentioned moving on to an RE :( which is not an option for us.

I hope things are going well with your daughter. Yesterday mine broke down crying that she wanted a sister and was tired of being alone. This is the driving force behind my anxiety/depression with TTC, but I just hugged her tight and explained to her that it's out of our control. I always remind her that she'll have friends along the way in life that will become like sisters/brothers.

I had a really bad day around 8 dpo where I became very withdrawn. We had dinner with my in-laws at a park and I sat at the picnic tables the entire time. Earlier that day I just knew that this month would not be the month. I try not to be so withdrawn, especially around family/friends, but it's so hard not to cry. I'm the kind of person that breaks down if they even open their mouth while feeling like I did. It didn't help that there were pregnant women everywhere. My MIL assumed I was mad at her because I didn't talk much. I feel somewhat better now that I've accepted that this cycle is over. Now I'm just waiting for my next cycle to begin.
Me 30 ~ DH 31 ~ DD 11 - DS 12/5/14

BFP ~ 4/2/14 <3

10 years and 11 months after our sweet baby girl, our sweet baby boy arrived <3

Blog <3
http://eatingmyselfpregnant.blogspot.com/
ambernicole8484
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 4367
Joined: Wed Aug 24, 2011 12:00 am
Location: Kentucky

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby rae17 » Mon May 06, 2013 3:29 pm

First I want to say that I'm sorry you are feeling like TTC has been affecting you as a parent. Although I have secondary infertility as well I think one of the only positives it has given me is that I try to fully enjoy every minute I have with my DS. It took us 4 years to conceive him and he is 4 years old now.

We have been actively TTC #2 for over a year and we haven't been preventing for over 10 years. I totally understand how depressing it can get to see pregnant women everywhere and watch your friends have their 2nd, 3rd and even 4th babies. Trust me, you're not alone! My only advice would be to try and focus less on the child you don't have (yet) and more on the one you do have :)
rae17
Friend
 
Posts: 16
Joined: Mon Mar 04, 2013 2:10 pm

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby loveandmarriage » Fri May 10, 2013 5:02 pm

I've been up and down. Even when I am down I can now force a smile and still hav e time for dd. Trying to start my own business but ran into financial obstacles so starting way smaller than had originally planned. Its helping to have a goal I can control rather than focusing so much on another baby which is in Gods hands
Me: 26
DH: 28
Together since October 2006
Married since August 2008
TTC #2 since October 2008


ME
Lab work 4/12: hormone levels and thyroid are good.
u/s 4/29: microscopic cysts on both ovaries. Another u/s in August to ensure cysts have not grown.
HSG 6/19: no blockage everything good
Gyno 7/8-vaginal u/s and clomid prescribed
+hpt 7/15-never taking hpts again. They are inaccurate.
-beta 7/19- HCG 0.
8/14: start Clomid 50mg CD3-7
9/1: Blood work to check progesterone levels


DH
Urologist 5/20
SA 6/12-Count 97 million, motility good, morphology 2.5%
Urologist 7/1: complete sa results, IUI suggested



ImageMy Ovulation Chart

Image

Image
User avatar
loveandmarriage
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 846
Joined: Sun Dec 02, 2012 12:49 pm
Location: Weston, WV

Re: think ttc is making me a bad mom

Postby erica21210 » Sat Dec 14, 2013 2:22 pm

Yes I can totally relate to this! I am glad to know I'm not alone in feeling this way. <3
Image

Image
erica21210
Member
Member
 
Posts: 24
Joined: Sat Dec 14, 2013 2:08 pm


Return to Secondary Infertility