Hope this inspires others :)

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Hope this inspires others :)

Postby Nicole9891x » Sun Oct 11, 2015 8:21 pm

Hi Ladies,

I am no longer TTC but I swore I would post when I did become pregnant in hope that I would really inspire women like women that inspired me and offer some type of reassurance and support.

I had a feeling I may not be able to conceive, when I went to my GP he told me I was young and there was no point running any tests. When I turned 18 I became pregnant for my long term partner but I miscarried at 8 weeks, when I went for my scan I was told that the size of the sac was 5 weeks and there was no heartbeat present. After two years I still hadn't gotten pregnant and we decided to go to another GP who ran some blood tests but nothing unusual was picked up, I was told I was young and should continue trying and it would just happen. Well last year (6 years later) I registered with another GP after moving home. The same tests were repeated (by now I had done them countless times over the years), this time bloods were fine but I was diagnosed with PCOS after an ultrasound and I was then referred to Endocrinology. I was put on Metformin by the endo and told to return in a few months. Well the Metformin made me sick within the first few weeks and my GP advised me to come off of them. Months later I was then referred to a fertility specialist who did my bloods all over again. I was then advised to have a HCG and if this didn't work I'd have to start IVF. I had my HCG done and fell pregnant the 2nd cycle after. I am now 33 weeks pregnant.

I know it is very brief story but it has taken me about 7 years to get here. I understand how heartbreaking and agonising it can be when you symptom spot and then AF arrives. When other people around you start to have children or go on to their 2nd etc, the questions "when do you plan to have children??", the way you almost feel as though you are not woman enough because you're having difficulties bringing life into the world, the effect it can have on your relationship especially when your other half seems to be okay and wants children, when sex becomes a test to see if this is "the month" even talking to people who have blanket staments a like "you'll be ok, it will happen.", stalking the ttc and tww forums, seeming like everything different you notice about your body is a symptom of pregnancy and even trying to decipher the differences between pregnancy and pre AF symptoms.

I didn't do anything miraculously different the month I conceived, in fact I hadn't had alcohol for years prior and that month I started to have the odd glass of wine here and there, the month before me and my boyfriend went away just to get away from the hectic lifestyle we had over here. I was more laid back then previous months, the only day I cried and questioned out aloud what was going on was on Mothers Day in March.

I don't know if the Metformin worked for me for a while, or the HCG 'cleaned me out' (the dye took some time to go into my tubes and the gynae told me sometimes there could have been a mild blockage), if it was the holiday and I let my hair down and really just enjoyed sex for the first time in ages. I even found out when I had my first scan my womb is tilted backwards and I had been having sex whilst laying on my stomach with deep penetration (TMI sorry) which is supposed to help conception for women with wombs like myself.

But I am thankful I am pregnant and as I lay here and reflect I really wanted to share this with other women who are ttc and going through what I went through. Please do not give up hope and have faith. You never know when it may happen, as long as the journey seems there is still a possibility that it can happen. I am now 26 and this is my first, my mum is 48 and had a baby this time last year. My point is even age used to intimidate me but don't be too harsh or negative with your thoughts and try not to compare yourself with others. We are all on our own individual journey.

Take Care and I wish all of you the best for the future.

Nicole x
Nicole9891x
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