i have 10 children, but between my 9th and 10th i suffered 2 chems and a m/c at 9 weeks. then i had israel and got preg again in december of 11. i lost my son rand at 14 wks 5 days in march of 12. i am now just over 4 weeks pg, please pray that i get to have this little baby. my heart is so full of fear and sadness, i am just so scared to hope anymore.
after everything that has happened, i am not sure howmuch more sadness and heartbreak i can take. thank God everyday for my kids, i love them all, but having so many doesnt make it so you dont miss the others you lose...kwim? anyways, sorry for the ramble.














