Lost newbie needs prayers, please

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Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby estrella » Tue Sep 29, 2015 12:01 am

Hi everyone. Please be gentle - I just bailed out of another fertility board where I was essentially told to give up hope on my first and only post.

DH and I are deeply in love and have survived several years of some pretty fundamental crises. We have TTC for over 5 years while simultaneously having our lives upended with multiple moves, abusive jobs, layoffs, sick parents, stalker landlords...there's even more, but you get the idea. I just turned 42, and to date we have never even had a scare.

Medically we have both checked out OK, except for The One Thing: he has low motility. With everything we have gone through, we are in no emotional or financial place to gamble on any kind of medical intervention, and my insurance does not cover a penny. So now we are both taking FertilAid, I'm looking into acupuncture for both of us, I'm losing weight (all that stress shows on the scale), and I'm flat-out praying. Praying, praying, praying. We also plan to attend an orientation on Foster Adoption in January, because we are realistic about our chances.

I live life doing everything I can to forget the gnawing hole in my chest that won't go away. Sometimes I cry on the train going home from work. We have had so many things we've had to overcome, but I would live through all of them again if we could just be spared this one last iron gate.

Oh, and my best friend is about to give birth next month with a baby she conceived on her third 100% free try of IUI (thanks to her insurance), and I can barely stand talking to her anymore because it hurts too much.

So my companions on this journey, please pray for me. Please. And I wish you all blessings.
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Joined: Mon Sep 28, 2015 11:24 pm

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby Danaa » Tue Sep 29, 2015 7:33 am

I'm so sorry about ur situation,I know the pain of ttc,I know the pain of seeing everyone get pregnant but not you.There is always a chance as long as you have faith in God,I suggest start temping and use opk to pinpoint ur O day so u know exactly when to BD,I think with low motility the timing is essential? You could try soft cups with pressed,I heard alot of succes stories,also Selenium and Vitamin E is good for men if I'm not mistaken Zinc is also good.Good Luck and I hope u get ur baby.
My Ovulation Chart
Me 29
DH 31
After 3 years in which we tried everything we are doing IVF in Greece with Iakentro Athens.
Short Protocol with Bemfola and Cetrotide
19mature eggs and we have 9 day5 blasto.
FET#1 ended in a very early loss,chemical pregnancy.
FET#2 ended in a loss at 22w due to IC,my boys will be forever in my heart .
FET#3 MMC at the 10 weeks ultrasound.
FET#4 2018
Posts: 10111
Joined: Wed Nov 12, 2014 5:54 am

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby estrella » Tue Sep 29, 2015 10:14 pm

Thank you Danaa, I appreciate it.

We have been using the SoftCups and Pre-Seed for 5 cycles. I have been temping and using mucus to detect my O day, but maybe I need to start using OPK's as well. DH has said that next cycle, we are going to BD every single day, cycle or not. We have nothing left to lose by doing so. And I hear FertilAid can take a few cycles to ramp up. Here's hoping.

Today I received word that a job I started 3 months ago is going to have layoffs tomorrow and our branch is going to be hit hard. When the news washed over me, my heart just sank, and sure enough tonight I began to spot.

Oh well, onward. :)
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Joined: Mon Sep 28, 2015 11:24 pm

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby NewlyWed_Z » Wed Sep 30, 2015 4:25 am

Hi estrella,

I'm a newb too - how you feeling today?

From what I've been reading, stress certainly doesn't help and I hope you can find some positivity in all this <3

Sounds like the hubby is on board with you (suggesting BD everyday - holla!) - which is amazing!

Loads of positive vibes and hugs :hugs:
Me: 34, DH: 29

DD1: Baby O (born June 2016), conceived while tracking here :) in Oct. 2015 (BFP 10 DPO)

TTC No. 2: C1 (start Nov 21 - cycle 29 days)

Taking multivitamins only for now
TTC Queen
TTC Queen
Posts: 331
Joined: Wed Sep 23, 2015 11:24 pm

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby MrsMummy2B » Fri Mar 10, 2017 8:55 am

@estrella I feel for you I really do. I pray you get the pregnancy and baby you desire.
Please don't cut your friend out she will need you now more than ever and want to share this with you. It will be hard but you will look back in the future and wish you had been there for her if not. :)
babyquestfoundation.org - this may help, its helped a lot of people in financial struggles like yours to help pay for IVF. good luck!
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Joined: Fri Feb 17, 2017 6:39 am

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby EstrellaS » Sat Apr 13, 2019 8:06 am

This broke my heart. I can't believe this happened. You must be quite sad. I can understand the pain. I've had to go through a miscarriage, by the way. So I can relate to your situation. I hope things get better for you, honey. This time will pass for you!
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Joined: Mon Dec 03, 2018 9:14 am

Re: Lost newbie needs prayers, please

Postby hannahdavid » Sun Apr 14, 2019 11:54 am

I hope you are well. I can very much relate to you. I have been on this journey for quite some time. My one advice to you would be to visit a good RE doctor. They will help both you and your DH. Just dont lose hope! I am sure things will get better. Sending baby dust your way.
-Low AMH and High FSH
-Poor Ovarian Reserve
-5 IUIs (failed)
-1 IVF (failed)
Life is a total mess
TTC Diva
TTC Diva
Posts: 465
Joined: Tue May 22, 2018 4:03 pm

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