Trying to Conceive Forum

by **Andi0623** » Mon Aug 07, 2017 6:47 am

Hi all,

Today is a little hard for me. With this morning's negative pregnancy test, it makes a full year of unsuccessfully trying to conceive.

I'm perfectly healthy and have no known issues. I was on the pill for about 4.5 years before going off when we started TTC. I had a normal fertility blood test in December. I wanted my husband to get tested if this last cycle was unsuccessful, but as of yesterday he "feels like he's fine."

I just feel like I'm failing my husband today. He wants a child so badly, and I, for some reason, can't seem to provide. This month is also hard because, while I learned months ago that symptom spotting is no good, this month seemed different. I was constipated, had cramping and backaches around 10 dpo, and my husband pointed out that I seemed a little sick many mornings. I got my hopes up again.

Thanks for reading.

by **starzz121** » Mon Aug 07, 2017 7:27 am

Hi Andi

You are not alone i am well past the 12 month mark on TTC, but dont give up hope i know a few couples its taken around a year a conceive. xx

by **whoz** » Mon Aug 07, 2017 5:48 pm

Hello Andi,

I am so sorry you are feeling this way. Infertility is incredibly hardbreaking and a head-f*@k too. It's basically torture and with so many emotions whirring around all the time. They say that it's on par if not worse than having cancer, in terms of the emotional upheaval.

I am around 20 months ttc now with one loss. It's maddening, sad, depressing, confusing, hopeful only to be disappointed, etc. It's so hard.

by **Andi0623** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 5:59 am

Thank you for your responses. I was having a tough time and needed the support you provided.

Here's the question I have now - since we've officially passed the 12 month mark, should we now seek help? I know that's what is recommended. I just placed an order for FertilAid (men and women).

by **whoz** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 8:33 am

Hi Andi,

Yes, you can get a referal to a fertility encronologist now that it's been past 12 months. Perhaps have your OB recommend one to you. Then you can undergo all of the general testing/screening for you and your DH. Hopefully they will find a small thing wrong with your hormones or tubes that they can easily fix!

I did fall pregnant with DS on Fertilaid, and FertileCM along with preseed, etc. So, maybe that will help!

What blood tests did you do in Deccember? Day 3 tests? I hope your DH will get tested. It's so quick and easy for him. Do you chart? Have a normal luteal phase? Regular periods? Do you know if you ovulate regularly?

by **Andi0623** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 9:11 am

I don't chart, so I'm unsure about the details of my cycle.
I looked into it, but felt overwhelmed and ended up not even trying. I've used ovulation kits and track my period. My period is irregular, between 35-43 days usually, but have had a 49. Yes, it was the day 3 testing that came back all normal.

I'm hopeful that the FertilAid will help before we go to a specialist.

by **whoz** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 9:37 am

Yes, Fertilaid really does help to make periods more regular--it did for me! I hope it will bring you down to a more managable number. I am also glad you're wise enough to know that BBT charting would stress you out more than help you. Maybe do a sono hsg as well to check your tubes, when you decide to go to a specialist.

by **Andi0623** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 12:24 pm

That's great to hear! I think I'll try 1-2 months with FertilAid to see what happens before going to a specialist. I wish I'd found out about it sooner.

Any idea what the specialist may cost? Of course I know it'll depend on what we have done, but was hoping for a general estimate so that we know if we need to start setting money aside for it.

by **whoz** » Wed Aug 09, 2017 5:08 pm

I think with everything included it was $1500, about. Insurance covered the blood work but not the semen analysis and HSG sono.

by **BuffaloMaple** » Wed Aug 23, 2017 9:36 am

Hi Andi, I realize this post is a little old but wanted to chime in. I remember how the 12 month mark felt - sad, scary, and full of anxiety. I waited until the 13th month to seek help. Just go at your own pace and you'll know when you're ready. The initial testing really isn't all that bad and you can decline anything you're not ready for. Awesome your blood test came back normal - that's a great start!

Definitely have your DH tested! It's so easy and will take care of 40% of the "what ifs." My DH is one of the healthiest people I know (very fit, lean, eats decent, never smokes or drinks) and he tested with a low count. No clue why and you would never guess there was an issue with him.

by **Andi0623** » Wed Aug 23, 2017 5:16 pm

Thank you for your response! I am feeling more positive now, having recovered from the devastation of the 12 month mark. My husband and I both started on FertilAid this month. If we are still unsuccessful, I think we will go to the doctor.

How do you go about going to the specialist? Just ask my OB/GYN for a recommendation?

by **BuffaloMaple** » Thu Aug 24, 2017 10:16 am

I'm glad you're feeling better! Funny how much our emotions can swing while TTC. Yes, just ask your OB for a referral to a fertility clinic. They should have no problem doing that since you've been trying for 1 year, and they might even offer to do some of the testing themselves. My OB ordered the semen analysis for DH, and once that came back abnormal she referred us to a fertility clinic.

Also, good luck with the Fertilaid! I don't have any experience with the womens version, but the men's version worked really well for my DH while he was on it. I hope this is your month!

by **sunshinepgh84** » Fri Aug 25, 2017 11:29 am

Hi Andi!

At the 12 month mark my OB/GYN put me on clomid for 3 cycles and it did not work so then I went to an RE. You've already done the Day 3 bloodwork so that's a positive first step. The fact that its normal is AMAZING! (Mine was not and it was a HUGE shock.)

I would go to your OB/GYN ASAP! I did NOT need a referral to the RE, but my OB/GYN gave me one anyway. It takes a while to get an appointment. But the OB/GYN will LIKELY get you on Clomid. It's cheap and based on your long and irregular cycles you should probably seek treatment. I have friends who were on birth control and it wasn't until they tried to conceive that they noticed irregular cycles. You could have PCOS.

As for me, a visit to the RE only requires your insurance co-pay. It's the ultrasound and HSG that's expensive, but WORTH IT for a diagnosis. If you are super upset by hitting the 12 month mark, I wouldn't (personally) mess with vitamins and just head straight to the doctors.

I'm not a doctor or anything, but if you have irregular cycles it will be hard for you to track things.

by **Andi0623** » Sat Sep 09, 2017 9:11 am

Thanks everyone for your support. Month 13 TTC (month 1 on FertilAid) was unsuccessful. I had hope for a few days, though, as I was throwing up yesterday morning (after eating a boiled egg) and got super nauseous/crampy after eating lunch two days earlier. Normally I hardly cramp and my stomach is pretty solid, so these crazy things seemed like big signs. Now I guess I need to check on how I'm prepping my food!

I plan to call my doctor on Monday. We will see what happens from there.

by **whoz** » Sat Sep 09, 2017 7:41 pm

So sorry about the disappointment! Keep us posted, Andi.

I'm in my tww and will get a laparoscopy done at the end of the month. Going in to cycle 22.