Title: making a baby
Category: happy
Blog Entry: I just had this sent to me and was hysterical laughing,. If it offends anyone please let me know and ill take it down right away... if not hope it made u laugh The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate
father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr.
Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man we chose as
a surrogate should be here soon.' Half an
hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring
the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come
to...' 'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs.
Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.' 'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good.
Did you know babies are my specialty?' 'Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and
have a seat.' After a moment she asked,
blushing, 'Well, where do we start?' 'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one
on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room
floor is fun. You can really spread out there.' 'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for
Harry and me!' 'Well, Ma'am, none of us
can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions
and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the
results.' 'My, that's a lot!' gasped Mrs.
Smith. 'Ma'am, in my line of work a man
has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure
you'd be disappointed with that.' 'Don't
I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly. The
photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby
pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said. 'Oh, my word!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat. 'And these twins turned out exceptionally
well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.' 'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith. 'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take
her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and
five deep to get a good look.' 'Four and
five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement. 'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for
more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I
could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.
Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack
it all in.' Mrs. Smith leaned forward.
'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?' 'It's true, Ma'am, yes... Well, if you're
ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.' 'Tripod?' 'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's
much too big to be held in the hand very long.' Mrs. Smith fainted.
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