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Trying-to-Conceive Blog

Ttc 7+years. First cycle w/ clomid and progesterone.

I want to start by saying in 6 years I'll be the age my grandmother was when she became a grandmother. That bothers me.

I been a member here for 4+ years but browser for much longer. Ttc over 7 years at this point and finally have gone for help with my infertility. I have been diagnosed with pcos although I *can* ovulate on my own it is getting more and more irregular as years pass. I have cysts on both ovaries and my right ovary is enlarged on ultrasound looks as though there's a lot of scar tissue (? I'm confused by most of what I have been told) Recent blood work shows very low progesterone 8dpo with a consistant 12 day luteal phase for as long as I've been charting (7 years) which my doctor considered as luteal phase defect which I thought would be fine over 10 days... I went to this doctor as he helped two women I use to work with get pregnant but maybe I read too much on the internet and should be more open to trying new things.

I use to spend most of my time on tww for the first 4 or 5 years as I *knew* my time would come, holding on *hope*... but as time progressed the more bitter I was and hated the "after 8 long months it finally happened! Hold on hope girls!" bfp posts. Ugh! 

I also am so sick of trying to talk to fertile friends about my struggle with infertility, "If it's meant to happen it will" 

that actually doesn't help... 

so I guess you're saying it's meant for you but not for me?

This is cd2 and I am for the first time in years excited for this cycle... Still pessimistic about expecting a couple pills to help me get pregnant but after 3 rounds we are doing hsg dye test to check if my tubes are blocked up and a camera or scope to check for endometriosis... It's a bit over whelming and I question everything this doctor had decided so far but after 7 years at this point in my life I'm willing to make my ovaries explode in attempt to do what I couldn't alone - have a baby.

As for the medication: I'm prescribed 50mg clomiphene citrate cycle days 5 to 9, ovulation tests and bbt till Ovulation then blood work 7, 8 or 9 dpo for pregesterone again, which my doctor expects to be low and then I'll start progesterone supplement that I'm not sure about mg or anything yet.

I honestly waited for too long to ask for help looking back now.... 

**I wanted help a long time ago...

*but I guess I thought my body would do what it's meant to do. 

*I guess I thought if it was meant to happen it would.

*I thought what I've been told must be right, I must be *trying too hard* by simply being aware of when my most fertile time was.

*I thought if my neighbor can be a drugged out of her mind pill head and have two babies then I could just as easily do the same but sober and eating healthy.

*If my nasty_std_infected_21_year_old_cousin can be about to give birth to her 2nd it must be God's will.

As a broken incubator I've became very bitter, ugly and jealous. I wasn't always like this.

But

I haven't given up yet.

Let's do these fertility pills y'all! 'Cause if God don't will it, maybe some science can help figure it out.

 

BTW why the hell is there so much spam blogs

Comments

The spam is terrible :) I'm glad you got some help. Hopefully all this medical stuff pays off soon.