baby shower for 2nd baby?

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baby shower for 2nd baby?

Postby obxgirl » Thu Feb 10, 2011 1:22 pm

Just curious how many people are having a shower for the 2nd (or more) baby. A friend of mine is throwing me a very small brunch... which I think will be a really nice way to honor this baby. I specifically requested no big gifts. Although..I must say, I never thought I would be able to have 2...so I got rid of several things I will need again!!!
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Postby bsweet » Thu Feb 10, 2011 2:08 pm

I default to Miss Manners on things like this. A second shower is only appropriate if the 2nd child is of a different sex. Otherwise it shouldn't be called a shower (i.e. a small gathering to honor the child is fine, but gifts should not be expected).
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Postby Heather32 » Thu Feb 10, 2011 3:43 pm

Well I would did not have a second baby shower (I am one who does not think it is appropriate under most circumstances) We did have a "Meet the baby" party after DS#2 was born at about 6 weeks (that late because I had torn a leg muscle and was in serious pain prior to that) and it was SUPER. All the family and our friends go to meet him and most brought small gifts because that is just what we do for new babies....anyways just thought I would offer up a alternative to the traditional "shower" :)
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Postby Zephyr » Thu Feb 10, 2011 4:18 pm

Easier to swallow if you but "no gifts please" on the invite. Otherwise it may come off greedy.
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Postby klbrown79 » Fri Feb 11, 2011 2:12 pm

i asked not have one for my second, I hate writing up the thank you letters.....
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Postby mjg1127 » Fri Feb 11, 2011 2:47 pm

I never had a shower after my first baby. I think if I got invited to a friends shower for a second baby, I would think it was odd. But that is probably just b/c I don't know anyone who has ever had a second shower. It is always nice to get new things for the baby. So that is great that you are getting one. It might be a nice idea to have your friend put on the invite that it is a party in honor of the baby and that gifts are not expected. Or like diapers only, or something like that. I dunno, just a thought. :D
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Postby BabyToBeNumber2 » Fri Feb 11, 2011 5:03 pm

We're going to do exactly what babyjinks did! Have a "meet the baby" party after baby is born...not expecting/asking for gifts, just excited to have people come meet our new little one! :)
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Postby punkykittysexpecting » Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:25 pm

i think each baby deserves a baby shower! either way if you have one and dont wanna recieve gifts, than write it on the invite. but they totally deserve to have a welcoming party to celebrate their arrival.
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Postby Heather32 » Fri Feb 11, 2011 7:36 pm

punkykittysexpecting wrote:i think each baby deserves a baby shower! either way if you have one and dont wanna recieve gifts, than write it on the invite. but they totally deserve to have a welcoming party to celebrate their arrival.



See and that is why we did the "Meet the Baby" party. Because so many of our family only gets together at holidays it was nice to have everybody get together and actually see the baby :) I have heard that these parties are also called "Sip and See" parties for like tea and brunch type get togethers after the baby is born..
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Postby bdipaolo86 » Sat Feb 12, 2011 7:31 am

I'm actually going to a baby shower for a good friend today and it's their second baby, second shower and second girl (she's 4) and they registered but just for little things. Like diapers, wipes, bottles, etc. I don't think it's rude. They tried for 3 years to get pregnant and went through a ton of treatments so I think this baby deserves a shower! Even if they didn't try so hard I still wouldn't think it's rude. I think every baby deserves a shower! I actually feel bad for my baby I'm pregnant with now because nobody except my good friend has bought her anything. Of course we don't need anything big but I just feel bad that my other girls have homemade blankets with their names on it and a bunch of other personalized gifts from showers and stuff. I feel like everyone has already forgotten about her and she's not even born yet.
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Postby klbrown79 » Sat Feb 12, 2011 10:02 am

I don't think the issue is that the babies don't deserve gifts, or a party for there arrival. Because every baby deserves a nice welcome. The close friends and family will buy gifts for anyone who has a baby..... and people that want to get you a gift will. But when you have a shower it really is a party to get presents so I think people feel obligated to buy a present. So open houses are good and stuff like that. I am not saying second showers are a no no, but just giving the other side. I got invited to a second shower 10 months after she had another baby for the same sex. Everybody was talking about it. Everyone has an opinion on it. No one will ever agree
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Postby Zephyr » Sat Feb 12, 2011 2:37 pm

klbrown79 wrote: But when you have a shower it really is a party to get presents so I think people feel obligated to buy a present.


Exactly. Else, they wouldn't be called "showers" or "sprinkles" or whatever the cutesy term is that implies gift giving.

I'm not sure I understand the "Every baby deserves a shower" thing.

Every baby deserves to be welcomed. Check.
Every baby deserves to be loved. Check again.
Every baby deserves a party where gifts are tradition even thought I might say that I don't expect everyone to buy something. Uh... :?
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Postby punkykittysexpecting » Sun Feb 13, 2011 7:45 pm

okay... yes every baby deserves a shower. but im saying that... you dont havta do a shower.. you can just do a welcoming party, if you dont wanna do the gift thing. but people are still gonna bring a gift half the time anyways even if its just a get together... if you know what im saying.. and at the same time they arent obligated to buy something either.
i wasnt saying that you guys dont think they dont deserve. thought i would clear that up.
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Postby zohbeeeee » Mon Feb 14, 2011 2:08 am

I'm having a shower for my second. A friend asked if she could throw it. It will be very small and just a few close friends. I have gone or been invited to several small 2nd baby showers. It is not tacky in the least. It is about celebrating mom and being excited over a new baby. More low keyed with the second.
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Postby Heather32 » Mon Feb 14, 2011 9:09 am

It might be a cultural thing...depending on how and where you were raised. It is considered tacky how I was raised, however almost no one tells the party giving the shower or receiving the presents..it is all talked about before and after the party..privately. Just like every other breech of etiquette..the person is discussed out of earshot...
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