soooo disappointed need to VENT!

Fourth you ask? Your body is still full of pregnancy hormones as you adjust to life sleep-deprived with your new baby outside your womb.

Moderators: B Michaelson, southernbelle, jessm, 1daysoon, reapage, Honey Bunny, unaffected, maddy, TrebleLily

soooo disappointed need to VENT!

Postby Tracylee » Sat Nov 28, 2009 9:05 am

When I had my daughter I tried to BF but between her bad latch, my irritability with being a first time sleep deprived mom and all the gas and digestive issues my breast milk gave her, I stopped BF after like a week or so and then stopped pumping within a few weeks.

This time I was sooo focused on BF I was determined to get a good latch and spend time getting it down right. When Dominic was born, he went to the NICU for two weeks. During that time I pumped religiously so he could be feed and had lactation meet me there each day for one of my BF sessions with him so they could help me. I was sooooo elated when he took to the breast and latched on perfectly within seconds. NOW!! the nurses would always tell me how gassy he was and how fussy he was however they never mentioned that they thought it could be related to any feeding issues. Just that he farts like a sailor and talks a lot in his sleep.

Soooo when I get home, and he is stricly on breast milk with no formula supplements BOY did the gassy and fussy show it's ugly head. Not to mention his feeding issues while in the NICU (would not eat more than a 1/2 ounce to an ounce at a time) did not go away. Dominic was wanting food every hour to and hour and a half and then when he wasnt feeding he was grunting and pushing the entire time. Especially at night, we got no sleep because who in the right mind can sleep while someone is grunting and farting in your ear so to speak.

When we went to his 2 day appointment at the Dr. said they thought again, it was my breast milk causing the issue and to go a head and keep pumping but for a few days, feed him Prosobee and see if some of the problems improve. Just my luck they did, and finally he is feeding a more normal schedule, every two to three hours and the fussy gassy stuff is considerably less.

So in one hand I'm happy that he feels better and he is sleeping better as well as mommy and daddy HOWEVER I'm soo disappointed that I tried so hard and now feel like I've failed. My mother tells me I shouldn't be that upset and that at least he got a few weeks of breast milk to help is immune system but I still feel bumed that I wanted it to work so badly and I accomplished my goal but his digestive system just isnt cooperating.

I guess it's just all part of life and I should deal with it, but I still needed to vent. Thanks for listening-
ImageImageImage
User avatar
Tracylee
Angel
Angel
 
Posts: 587
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 12:00 am
Location: Clearwater, Fl

Postby Renct519 » Sat Nov 28, 2009 12:22 pm

It's ok to be disappointed. BF is alot harder than most people let on. Then when you add in such things as: NICU stays, digestive issues and stress, it makes it even harder to accomplish and stay on track.

Don't feel you have failed. You gave it a great try and he will be better for it later. I know exactly how you feel. My son was in the NICU for 12 weeks and I pumped religiously for that time, but for some reason as soon as he got home, my milk supply just went away and after just 4 or so days of being home I had to stop completely.

I do my best now to see it as, as long as he is getting the nurishment he needs to survive, I don't care how he gets it. I worked to hard to get him into this world and he has worked too hard to stay here for me to get upset over something that in 15-20 years isn't gonna seem like a big deal. :)

I hope you feel better about all of this soon. Your son is adorable!
<strong>Me ~ 28<strong><strong> Image Image</strong></strong></strong>
User avatar
Renct519
Hot Mama
Hot Mama
 
Posts: 183
Joined: Thu Feb 05, 2009 1:00 am
Location: Hedgesville, WV

Postby meg1492 » Sat Nov 28, 2009 12:26 pm

Could it be a food issue..like dairy? Something that you are passing along to your LO that causes the gassiness?

I don't like that they told you to stop BFing so quickly without seeing if there were other things you could try, like diet elimination.

I also don't think that you should feel guilty. Talk to the LC in your area and see what THEY suggest. :)
Dear Son born at 41w, delivered vaginally and med free after labor for a day and a half.
Image

Image Image
User avatar
meg1492
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 3184
Joined: Thu Mar 19, 2009 12:00 am

Postby Liza24 » Sat Nov 28, 2009 6:02 pm

I am going though the SAME THING!! I feel for you!

Connor was great on Bm till about 5 weeks, then he got gassy and fussy no matter WHAT i ate or didnt.

Its gotten ALOT better with formula( similac sensitive RS), and i feel bad about it. I was even trying to get him back to BM till last week, when he got so gassy and fussy he cried for 5 hours. I gave in then, but know that he got ALOT of what he needed from me, and thats a good thing!
Me:37
DH:48
Connor: 6
BFP #2!! 9/24/2015

ImageMake a pregnancy ticker
User avatar
Liza24
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 1675
Joined: Wed Feb 11, 2009 1:00 am
Location: Upstate NY

Postby Tracylee » Sat Nov 28, 2009 6:59 pm

Thank you ladies, I appreciate the stories and kind words.
ImageImageImage
User avatar
Tracylee
Angel
Angel
 
Posts: 587
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 12:00 am
Location: Clearwater, Fl

Postby J_blackrose » Sun Nov 29, 2009 5:19 am

ah I am so sorry. I know it must be hard to want to BF and it just not work out. But the fact of the matter is you try as hard as you could and that's the important thing. don't beat yourself up to much about it.
Beta 1664 at 4w2d
Beta 3683 at 4w4d
heard the :hb: at 8w0d

Image

Image

december 15, 2009
7lbs 11oz 19 inchs long
User avatar
J_blackrose
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 2746
Joined: Fri Apr 11, 2008 12:00 am

Postby dee12h » Sun Nov 29, 2009 9:25 pm

I am sorry you had to go through all that. How come ppl don't tell us bf is so hard! :)

I would think, like pp, that it would be something you're eating that would cause that. Mine had the same problems but outgrew it w/o me having to change my diet (thank God). My nutitionist did say that I should be eating fruit, veggies, and protein (meat, nuts, eggs) and that's it- for the first couple months til his system is more mature. Most of the time, you have to be off of it for at least a week to tell a difference. I know it's hard, but if bf is important to you it might be worth a shot. :?: I also don't see anything wrong w formula if you can't do that or at least until you've been on a better diet for awhile.

Hope things get better whatever you decide!! :D
"It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men" -Frederick Douglass
DS1- 4YO
DS2- 1YO
User avatar
dee12h
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 3071
Joined: Thu Jan 08, 2009 1:00 am
Location: Texas

Postby jadie_f » Tue Dec 01, 2009 7:35 am

sorry mama, you tried so hard. My girl is going through the same thing, only formula made her worse. My doc says most babies will outgrow this phase, maybe you could pump and freeze for a while and slowly reintroduce BM later in life, and if not you could always donate it too. But dont feel guilty or be so hard on yourself, I agree that BF is the hardest thing I have ever done, and I am struggling with EPing now. You did great
Di Di Ci Ci
:hb: 10/19/09 :hb:
Jay Jay Nay Nay is here! Born au naturel in my CAR!!!
:hb: 4/26/11 :hb:

And for my next trick....surrogacy! BFP 5dp5dt! EDD 2/22!

Image

http://mylifeisblindhope.blogspot.com/
User avatar
jadie_f
Girlfriend
Girlfriend
 
Posts: 3636
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 1:00 am

Postby amandapanda » Thu Jan 14, 2010 10:12 pm

dee12h wrote:I am sorry you had to go through all that. How come ppl don't tell us bf is so hard! :)


I know, right?!?!?!? BF has been so extremely difficult for me too, you're not alone sweetie!!!! I had so much pain, I cried every single time I breastfed for 2 and a half months. Met with 2 lactation consultants who couldn't find a problem. Honestly, I don't know why I even kept doing it, it just became habit after a while, oh it's feeding time, better get my kleenex, heh.

I think it's wonderful that you breastfed for a while!! In my eyes, after my experience, all mommies who even ATTEMPT it are superwomen. :)

I know you're disappointed. But what's the alternative, we have to feed our babies, and formula is really great stuff these days! When life gives us lemons, we make lemonade. We stay up all night with our babies, go back to work, run the household - we are mommies, hear us roar! haha :)
User avatar
amandapanda
Member
Member
 
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed Aug 12, 2009 12:00 am

Postby Tracylee » Fri Jan 15, 2010 7:16 pm

amandapanda - this post couldn't have come at a better time. My best friend just had a little girl two weeks ago and is BF beautifully. Every time I talk to her she goes on and on about how wonderful the expierence is,, YaDa YaDa YaDa. I'm so happy for her but I really don't want to hear about it. I didn't realize I was still bothered by not being able to successfully BF my son but I am. Your post put a smile on my face and made me feel sooooo much better. Thank You-
ImageImageImage
User avatar
Tracylee
Angel
Angel
 
Posts: 587
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 12:00 am
Location: Clearwater, Fl

Postby amandapanda » Fri Jan 15, 2010 10:23 pm

Tracylee that's wonderful, I'm here for you girl, anytime!!!!!!!!!!!! Remember you are amazing, go have a great weekend & treat yourself to something! :)
User avatar
amandapanda
Member
Member
 
Posts: 37
Joined: Wed Aug 12, 2009 12:00 am


Return to Fourth Trimester

cron