Just wanted to share!

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Just wanted to share!

Postby BBee » Mon Oct 07, 2013 6:27 pm

I just wanted to share this little inspirational "quote" I always go back to when feeling defeated. It really put things in perspective for me and I hope it can help you smile just a bit! Sending love to all the Mommies with Special Needs Babies :)


I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......

When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.

After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."

"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."

But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.

The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.

So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.

It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.

But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."

And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.

But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland.

- Emily Kingsley
Me:31 DH:33
TTC#1 since Jan 2009
DX: Unexplained Infertility
2nd IUI with 50mg Clomid :bfp: @ 10DPIUI
DS Born 11/15/11 ~ 8lbs 2oz 22"

TTC#2 since May 2012
DX: Male Factor
IUI #1 w/Ovidrel :bfn:
IUI #2 w/50mg Clomid & Ovidrel (3 follies) = :bfn:
IUI #3 w/Gonal,Ovidrel,Prometrium (at least 5 mature)= :bfn:

No longer TTC, Focusing on our Special Needs Son :hb:
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Re: Just wanted to share!

Postby B Michaelson » Tue Oct 08, 2013 10:26 pm

Love it!

My nephew is 3 now but was diagnosed as autistic at 2. What you have written above is so very true. We all expected it to be different and for a while we were sad that we couldn't bond with him the way we wanted to.

But he is so very special and has amazing qualities we might not otherwise appreciate. And the smallest thing....that he turned and waved goodbye to his bus driver...was news for a week and had all his friends and family beaming from ear to ear. He melts my heart and I know my sister, if given the chance, would never leave Holland to start over in Italy.
Me - 36
Hashimotos, JHS/EDS, ANA negative, 1 Fallopian tube
DH - 41
TTC #1 Aug 2012 - May 2014
DS - Born Jan 2015
TTC #2 since Aug 2016
May 2017 :bfp:

:angel: Our Angels :angel:
2004 - 7.5 weeks
Oct 2013 - 6w6d ruptured ectopic
Jan 2014 - Chemical



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Re: Just wanted to share!

Postby s4mm13 » Mon Dec 09, 2013 11:38 am

From someone who recently found out that we will be having a special heart baby, thank you for sharing this.
Me 29
DH 30
Oscar forever 5 months
Our beautiful son Oscar, born 24/2/14 at 32 weeks with Tetralogy of Fallot, oesophageal atresia and tracheo oesophageal fistula. Earned his wings aged 5 months and 1 day.

Oscar is going to be a big brother. BFP #2 29/11/14

Arlo William, our beautiful rainbow born safely 22nd July 2015


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