Those of you who have buried babies - feedback wanted...

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Those of you who have buried babies - feedback wanted...

Postby JakeandZachsparents » Fri Oct 02, 2009 6:06 pm

Hello....

We lost twin boys at 21 weeks in March of 2008. We had them buried in an infant shared plot run by SHARE. Prior to deciding to bury them there, we visited the place. It was so nice, people left flowers, toys, crosses, and such everywhere...kind of looked like a little kid's toy room. We didn't want them to be alone.

Recently, a decision was reached by the powers that be to remove all items from the cemetery once every two months. We are devastated, as the place looks bare and unloved when all of the mementos are removed.

We are trying to get the "powers that be" to reconsider this rash decision that was made without any feedback from affected parents.

I would appreciate anyone's opinions, thoughts, etc. Has anyone dealt with anything similar?

We feel betrayed because we chose to bury them there (we obviously had other options) because we liked the environment with the toys, momentos, and such. Now they are being removed, and it's not like we can have our kids buried somewhere else now.
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Postby macleesy » Fri Oct 02, 2009 6:38 pm

I haven't experienced this, but I just wanted to give you some big hugs - I can imagine how horribly betrayed you must feel over this. We chose to have Connor cremated, partially because of fears of situations like this. of moving to another city and leaving him behind and alone etc etc. We are going to spread his ashes in a special place to us that will always be special, and then make a memorial garden to him when we find a more permanent place to settle than we are now.

I would kick up a big public stink if I were you - write to the paper, petition local government, whatever else you can think of to shame te powers into changing their minds.

Or If it is just a case of keeping it "tidy" maybe you could organise a list of permanent items, so they only remove the dead/dishevelled/temporary things and keep the permanent mementos?
Lisa
Erin Nicole19 Dec 07
Annah Paige 2 Jan 11
Connor John 26 May to 7 Aug 09
My beautiful angel. :angel: So far from my reach, but so close to my heart.

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Postby JakeandZachsparents » Fri Oct 02, 2009 7:38 pm

Thanks for your feedback. One of the suggestions that we made was precisely what you suggested. They refused stating they didn't want to "judge" what was permanent and what was temporary...
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