3rd time lucky?

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3rd time lucky?

Postby monesue » Wed Apr 06, 2011 6:13 am

So 2 miscarriages a year apart and I just got another BFP yesterday! I so want to be excited but it's so hard. I haven't told anyone yet and my OH and I have been having some issues lately so I haven't even told him. I want a baby so desperately - it's been a 4 year struggle. I want to be as relaxed and carefree as I was the first time round with my son but all the joy has been taken out of it. I really really really want this to be a sticky one. I don't want to feel this anxious. :cry:
me - susan (33) OH- Paul (34) DS Nicholas (5)

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Postby Charese » Tue Apr 12, 2011 4:45 am

Hey Monsue,

I know how you feel. Trust me I do. But the last thing you want to do is stress out. It's hard to not worry, believe me, I worry all the time, watching the days go by, watching the clock, checking tp everytime I go to the bathroom, paying attention to every twinge, but a friend of mine on here just had a baby almost 2 weeks ago and she had suffered a loss and then got pregnant right away and worried too... but also told me that it's natural. She really helped me get through all the rough spots after I too suffered a loss in February and even was there to listen to me cry (virtually that is) out of confusion of "Why me?" until I felt better.

Just want you to know that most of us on this page have been there. And I want you to know that I'll be there for you, virtually ... just like she was there for me!

Take your time, take it all in, and breathe. :)
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Postby zohbeeeee » Wed Apr 13, 2011 3:34 pm

I understand your fear. I was there myself not to long ago. I am now 29 weeks pregnant after a miscarriage and 1.5 years of TTC #2. Just know that is can happen and you are well on your way to having that dream become a reality. I am not going to tell you to relax, as I never could even though I knew I needed to and that it was all out of my hands.

How far along were you with your other losses? Did you ever have them tested to see what went wrong?
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Postby monesue » Thu Apr 14, 2011 10:29 am

Hey Chareese and Zohbeeeee,
Thanks for the words of encouragement! My m/c last year was just past 5 weeks and this year I didn't even make it to 5 weeks before I started bleeding. Last year the doc said it was a miracle I got pregnant because my girly bits were in such a mess that it would have been a long and difficult journey for the egg to make it to my uterus. The recent m/c I think was more of a chemical. My period was a bout 4 days late and it was just like a chemical. Last year I bled for 3 months and it was all quite traumatising. I've had an operation to put my bits back in the right place so I know there is every chance that this will be a successful pregnancy and my hcg level seems to be rising properly this time round so I'm feeling like I can take a teeny tiny breath today.

I know I shouldn't wish the time to go by lord knows I've wanted to get pregnant for such a long time now that I want to enjoy it but I can't help wishing to be at the 12 week mark so I can relax a little more. It was so easy with my son. A drunken holiday in the sun and hey presto I was pregnant. It was a hard pregnancy because of my blood disorder but really apart from me being ill it all went pretty smoothly and I enjoyed it. I just want to enjoy this without the stress. I am trying not to but it's hard. Thanks for the kind words of support. How are you getting on? xx Does it get easier? Chareese, are you like me waitin to get to the 12 week mark? Zohbeeee am I kidding myself that it gets better then? I seem to remember worrying about everything during my first pregnancy and thinking it would end once I had my baby only to realise that's there's a whole new bunch of worries after the birth!!!xxx
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Postby zohbeeeee » Thu Apr 14, 2011 7:52 pm

Monesue. It does get easier. But I am sorry to say that for me it did not until I could feel the baby move. I felt a little better after the first trimester, but then a good friend on the boards lost her baby at the tail end of the first trimester and it set me to worrying again. BUT, once I felt baby move regularly (around 18 weeks) I hardly ever worried anymore. I still am not worried about baby, but am instead worrying about my postpartum period. I had terrible anxiety afterwards and had to go on meds. I plan on getting on them as soon as baby is out.

I had an easy pregnancy with my son as well. I also got pregnant the first time and pregnancy was issue free. When we decided to try for baby number two we thought it would be the same. Little did we know it would take over a year and a half to get pregnant, fertility treatments, and a miscarriage at 8 weeks (Trisomy 22).

The thing that helped me most was to stay busy and to relish in the thought that I was pregnant right now. No amount of worrying is going to make it better.
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Postby Charese » Fri Apr 15, 2011 10:07 am

Sorry it took me a minute to reply. The thing about me, Monsue, is that I feel that I like I can't or shouldn't post as much on here until I am at best 12-13wks along. I still haven't had my first u/s yet (outside of confirming pregnancy) and I won't until April 25. I'm worried and nervous and afraid that something will be wrong. Grant it, I've had an increased appetite, nausea if I don't eat by a certain time everyday and continued elevated BBT's. That's really all I have to go on. When I lost the first baby in February, I was bumbed out. I didn't want to work out, didnt' want to do anything, and didn't want questions from people asking me "How's the babe?". Luckily for me, this happened quickly and so the baby weight from the previous pregnancy didn't really disappear. Although I have had people tell me that I'm growing wonderfully in the belly area, but then is when I tell them about my miscarraige and that I'm now due in November rather than September. I feel much better talking about it now than I did when it first occured.

Like Zohbee said, you will worry and stress a little and may be even too hard to relax, but ultimately do what you should TO keep your stress level down. I've taken up prenatal yoga and also signed up for the 8-wk walking challenge at work in the "Casual conversation" walking group so that I can stay in exercise somehow, even on days I don't feel like working out, since we're to walk w/a pedometer at least an hour a day (I walk more than this, so I'm good).

Just try to keep busy and pray, pray, pray. I'm more in prayer now than ever before. Keeping my hands folded together in prayer that this baby sticks and we get to see his or her little face in November.

Charese
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Angel Babies: 2/14/11, 6/17/11

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150 :hb: 25w 2days

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