Describe your ideal (realistic) birth

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Describe your ideal (realistic) birth

Postby Zephyr » Sat Feb 19, 2011 2:07 pm

I'm interested in what the average woman's preferred labor experience is. If everything goes how you would like it to, tell us how that story looks.

And for the sake of keeping things somewhat grounded in reality, describe your ideal birth around any fixed factors that you know are part of your personal labor and delivery plan. Such as, if you're going for a repeat c-section, tell us how you hope it goes. None of that "I want to it to last 13 seconds, be totally pain-free, and then go skipping around with unicorns in a bed of roses" kinda thing. :wink:
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Postby BeccaM » Sat Feb 19, 2011 4:45 pm

My ideal labor would be just what I had, minus the tearing! I had an approximately 15 hour labor from the very start to finish. I had absolutely no pain medications and it was totally natural with plenty of movement, walking, rocking, hip rotations, mental and physical relaxation and using the hot shower for pain control. They monitored the baby off and on for 15 minutes at a time, which was fine. (I hated triage, though, having to lie on that bed for like an hour and a half... they were so slow there, grrrr...) Transition was rough, but pretty short and I pushed for only 45 minutes, but the baby's heart rate dropped and I had to push him out quickly, resulting in a 2nd degree tear, but it wasn't so bad.

I did everything I could do to prepare for the labor, so I would say, other than the tearing and baby's heartrate dropping a bit right near the end, I had the perfect labor, and I would be happy to have the same next time!!

I still look back and think, "How could something be so strenuous and painful, and yet it was the most wonderful 15 hours of my life?"
Isaiah, born Nov 14th, 2010, @ 39 weeks, 2 days. 8 lbs 2 oz. All natural hospital delivery.
Simon, born Mar 23rd, 2013 @ 39 weeks, 3 days. 8 lbs 4 oz. Our first home birth!!

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Postby Diana78 » Mon Feb 21, 2011 3:43 pm

Here's what could have made the process better
1. that it had progressed quicker! I was on pitocin for 24+ hours
2. I had asked for the epi about 1/2 hour sooner!
3. That I didn't have to have continuous monitoring so that I could walk around during early least until the eip
4. been induced a week earlier (even 2!!). I was not comfortable the last month!

I really can't complain though!! I had a relatively good childbirth, with my LO born happy and healthy despite being induced and having an epi! Not a single drop in hr or anything. I was able to push, yet not the excruciating pain (coupled with violent vomiting) I had right before the epi. I was able to truely participate and even enjoy the process.
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Postby mlpwyo1 » Fri Feb 25, 2011 2:21 pm

Having 3 natural childbirths and the following background:

DD#1, 24 hour labor, water didn't break til final push, I was too exhausted to push well when the time came, so pushing took 3 hours. Had to get her out w/vacuum extractor. Didn't care for that.

DD#2, 36 hour labor, water didn't break til final push, I was super tired when the time came to push (just like with DD#1) but I knew what to do and did it, so I "only" pushed for 1.5 hours with her. Didn't need a vacuum extractor.

DS, 12 hour labor, water broke at 4-5cm, never felt pain like those contrax before. No comparison to DD's labors (as tiring as they were). I only pushed 3x and DS was out but the pain after water breaking was off the proverbial charts. At least my "charts". Maybe cuz I was older or whatever...I do NOT want to experience that intensity level (of pain) again. It truly scared me even though I did it. It was scary.

So, given my "fear" of experiencing the DS-like water-breaking-at-5cm pain again, I'm going to labor as long as I can at home to try to get to the hospital at 5 cm (assuming water doesn't break before then), get an epidural for the first time in my life. And finish up the job not being scared of the pain (water breaking or not). Duration of labor I'm not so concerned with b/c I'm counting on the epidural allowing me to rest somewhat til it's time to push. The quicker the better, but I'd say this...

*labor at home for 8 hours (w.o. water breaking)
*arrive at hospital dilated to around 5cm
*get epidural, it works like it's supposed to work
*water breaks, I rest a bit while I continue to dilate
*when it's 10cm, I'm "told" it's time to push, epidural is eased up so I can feel pushing
*2-3 pushes, baby's out.

That's my ideal. We'll see how it goes. I know better than to think it will go as planned, but we gotta have something right?

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Postby mommyofgirls » Sat Feb 26, 2011 10:10 pm

My last birth was my ideal! 4 hours from start to finsh of labor. Epidural when I got admitted at 5cm. My pain was only a 3 on the scale before epi :D Easy peasey. I was so relaxed. It was so enjoyable. It was wonderful!
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Postby CaseyB » Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:35 pm

After talking to numerous friends, family, coworkers, and TWW friends, and watching way too many birth shows on TV :oops: I've compiled what I think would be my ideal birth.

First of all, I plan to labor at home for a while until I feel like I "need" to go to the hospital. This is mainly to avoid having to fight off nurses trying to give me pitocin. I plan to follow the Bradley Method as much as possible for pain relief. In the Bradley book, he talks about a time in labor where the woman will transition from being able to comfortably walk around between contractions to a point where she will want to lie down and rest because she is entering the active stages of labor where the cx's get closer together. I think this would be a good time to go to the hospital.
When I get to the hospital, they will give me an IV for emergency purposes only (since I have difficult veins) and they will cap it off. I will not be hooked up to anything except for intermittent fetal monitoring. I will be allowed to lie on my side the ENTIRE time until I'm ready to push. I will not be tortured by being forced to lie on my back for more than a couple minutes at a time. I will not receive an epidural. I will be allowed to eat and drink as I see fit. I'm scared to death of pooping while pushing, so I probably won't want to eat anything anyway, but if I feel like I'm going to faint I want to be allowed to eat something. The nurses will stay away for the most part and let me do what I need to do until it's time to push.
I will be allowed to labor as long as I need to before pushing. I will wait until I know for sure that it's time to push, and the baby will be born after 10 minutes of pushing. They will place her on my chest right away while DH cuts the cord. Then they'll clean her off and do what they need to do before returning her to me FOR GOOD.
She will not be taken from my room for any reason until I am discharged unless there is a life-threatening medical necessity. Any testing they need to do can be done in my room.
I will BF right after birth to stimulate the delivery of the placenta and to start our BF'ing bond. We will call our family to let them know our daughter was born and they will come to the hospital when I'm ready for visitors, not immediately after I give birth when I should be bonding with the baby. The in-laws are planning on coming to the hospital and waiting during labor so they can come into the delivery room right after the birth, so I'm thinking about keeping it a secret from them when I go into labor. I really don't want any visitors until I've been transferred to a recovery room and I'm done BF'ing my little girl.

I know this is totally wishful thinking, but it doesn't hurt to wish, right? LOL
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DD: Molly, July 2011, breech C/S
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Postby LaraE » Sun Mar 06, 2011 7:24 am

mommyofgirls wrote:My last birth was my ideal! 4 hours from start to finsh of labor. Epidural when I got admitted at 5cm. My pain was only a 3 on the scale before epi :D Easy peasey. I was so relaxed. It was so enjoyable. It was wonderful!

This is exactly what I want this time around!

for DS, i had over 24 hrs of back labor. It was terrible even with the pain medication. They also wouldn't give me the epidural that I begged for because I have a curvature of my spine (scoliosis). When I heard I wasn't getting the epi, i freaked out LOL He finally came out after 45 mins of pushing and he was 9lb13oz and 23.5 inches long. really big!
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Postby Nat » Tue Mar 08, 2011 10:37 pm

I dont mean to be a brag but i had my ideal birth with DS. He's my 3rd baby and it all went very well. Nothing to complain about at all. Home water birth, pain relief free, no tears or stitches and all over before evening hit. Noticed waters broke early morning and active labour didn't start til 2.30 and by 5.10pm he was born. I wasn't even tired! Was really ideal for me.
DD1 14,DD2 09/29/09,DS 12/17/10
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Postby Mommy~AMY » Sun Mar 13, 2011 4:09 pm

My ideal labor is my labor with DD (my third child). I was less than 2 hours from my first contraction until she was born, pushed for 10 minutes. I got to the hospital dilated to 8 and was only in my room for 20 minutes. The only thing I would change is having to have an IV and they couldn't find her heart rate while I was pushing and had to put one of those things on her head while pushing really hard on my belly (that really hurt!!)

As long as we make it to the hospital in time with our next one I'll be happy :wink:
Married to my wonderful DH since 2002

DS "D" 03/05
DS "Q" 06/07
DD "L" 10/08
DS "B" 11/11

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Postby Hunnybunny22 » Tue Mar 15, 2011 1:26 am

my ideal birth would be for me to go into labour naturally without being induced.
to be able to cope until around 4cm with my own pain management or gas and air.
if the pain is too bad to be able to move around the room to be able to use a birthing ball, and be able to choose my pain options,
i want to be giving birth in whatever position is comfortable to me.

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DS born: 42w1d 14.05.09 DD born 42w1d 15.04.11 DS 2 40w4d 27.10.13
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Postby Lark420 » Sat Apr 02, 2011 5:41 pm

The twins birth was pretty close to ideal for me, with the exception of being induced. From start to finish it was 13 hours. No pain meds, with the freedom to change position while laboring as I needed (even while having 2 heart monitors on at all times...just wasn't able to walk around, because they didn't have those mobile heart monitors for twins) Baby A was born with just 2 minutes of pushing, and then we had a beautiful hour enjoying her while we waited for baby B to move into position. Pushed through 2 contractions with baby B, and she was born. No tearing at all! Couldn't have realistically asked for a better birth story with twins!

For this baby, my ideal birth would be to go into labor of my own the day/night before a scheduled induction (Would be nice for it to happen then because I would already have my parents, who live 3 hours away, down to look after the girls, so I wouldn't have to worry about getting someone to watch them) Then I would love to already be at 5cm when i get to the hospital, and then progress pretty quickly, for a shorter labor. I'd love to have intermittent fetal monitoring, so I'd have more freedom to move around, and change position easier on my own. Would also love for my water to break on it's own this time! No pitocin at all! As for pushing, I'd like it to be pretty quick like it was with the girls, but I would like to feel a little bit more in control of my body at that point (my body completely took over with the twins, especially baby A...she came so quickly the doctor didn't even have time to get all her gear on...thank god she was already in the room when I suddenly got the urge to push, or else I may have given birth to her without anyone else in the room!)

But chances are things will go pretty much like they did with both my other labors...getting induced, no pain meds, and quick delivery. That's just fine by me too. I would just really like to experience going into labor on my own finally!
Me-Amelia, 28; Dh-28; dd1- 8/22/07;
Twin dd's- 12/16/09
dd4- 8/8/11



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Postby smouse77 » Wed Apr 20, 2011 4:51 pm

To be able to have a VBAC, anyway I can get it!
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Postby Masoria » Fri Apr 22, 2011 7:59 pm

Considering that for my first 2 the Demerol had worn off by the time labor started or didn't have any effect at all, I'm hoping this one will be completely drug-free. I will still be happy if I get Demerol, but I don't plan on ever using an epidural
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Postby Fawkes » Thu May 05, 2011 8:09 pm

For my labor I was induced and went pain free with piton contractions. Labor was about 3 1/2 hrs. I did go in at 3 cm, 80% effaced. I pushed for maybe 15 minutes and tore slightly.

I want that labor again, except to go into labor naturally. I loved that I was so much dialated when I got induced and hope, if there is a next time, that it's the same, possibly being further dilated before active labor. I do not want my water broken, I don't want to be hooked up to an iv or to a heart monitor continuously. I want to be able to move. I also want a doula.

The contractions were hell, especially on the pit, but I did it with out pain meds, so I'm confident I'll be able to go natural again. It was so empowering!
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Postby ashleyp » Mon May 09, 2011 8:56 pm

my ideal birth would be NO induction, and NO intervention, such as forceps/vacuum/csection. even if i get an epidural, i'm at peace with needing pain management. i just want to be able to go into labor on my own and push her out without any assistance from some scary tool.

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