people can be so ignorant...

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people can be so ignorant...

Postby jessm » Fri Jul 20, 2012 7:56 am

Last night I was talking to DH's aunt and she asked when I was going to stop breastfeeding that "I must not have much longer I have to do it". I said I wasn't planning on stopping anytime soon. She told me it was weird, and wasn't I going to stop when he started walking? First of all, what does one have to do with the other? I said no, I will stop when he is ready and as long as it mutually benefits us both. Her response "That's weird. I don't know how you can do that to yourself." I told her I actually like breastfeeding and she was like "I never knew anyone who did" (she doesn't have kids.)

Like WTF. How is it any of her business. And don't have opinions about something you know nothing about. I hate when people who don't have kids act like they have oh so much knowledge. There is a big difference between babysitting/nannying and parenting. When I told her the World Health Organization recommends going until 2 and the AAP says at least the first year she again said I was weird. Ugh.
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Postby Rubyru » Fri Jul 20, 2012 9:08 am

Some people just have no clue. Formula companies can promote and sell milk for 1+ and 2+ year old's but feeding your child the way nature intended is "weird", go figure. As for not knowing anyone who has enjoyed breastfeeding, what did she do, question people, gage their reaction to her criticism and decide they did not like it? Or perhaps she takes a survey of all breastfeeding women.
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Postby BeccaM » Fri Jul 20, 2012 10:25 am

Especially since she does not have kids, I hardly see any use in paying attention to her opinion :)

It is more sad than annoying to me. It shows how far we have to go before our culture is comfortable with and even embraces the nursing relationship. We've gotten so far off track :(
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Postby stefanielynn » Fri Jul 20, 2012 11:34 am

Oh goodness, and wait until you hit the 1 year mark. Yikes.

I agree with Becca--it's sad. I'm much more open about the fact that I am nursing a toddler this time around than I was with my first--I was a bit of a "closet" nurser then. I figure the more "normal" I (and other full-term nursers) treat it, the more "normal" society will (hopefully) begin to view it. I just don't want my daughter to have to deal with the ignorance nursing her children that I've had to while nursing my babies.
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Postby jessm » Fri Jul 20, 2012 11:35 am

Becca- CONGRATS!!! How exciting!

And you are right! Its not like he's 12 and I'm like "oh yeah, I still nurse him to sleep at night". He's still a baby for God's sake lol.

I just don't appreciate being called weird for enjoying a nurturing/loving relationship and bond with my son.
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Postby LaraE » Fri Jul 20, 2012 1:29 pm

Peopl are ignorant in so many ways. This reminds me of when my cousin was giving me feedinf advice and shes never had kids. I'm still mad at her and i'll be seeing her tomorrow at a family function. She better stay outta my way grrrrr

The other day my mom was surprised to see that Abby is still rear facing in her car seat. A) shes still in an infant carrier and B) she's 10 mo old! Then when i told her its recommended to rear face to age 2 and beyond, she said it was weird and acted like it just wasnt necessary. Wtf does it matter to her? Why even have an opinion on that?
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Postby Rubyru » Sat Jul 21, 2012 2:08 am

People are ignorant to the benefits of children being rear facing, but it is well known and well documented that facing away from the direction of travel
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Postby DueInMayMamma » Sun Jul 22, 2012 6:03 pm

I hate how our society treats mothers who breastfeed. Luckily, the place I work has a "pumping room" for the nursing moms, but most places (even though it's requirede by law) don't have places to pump, or if they do, they make it seem like a giant hassle. When I first started working where I do, some of the managers who had the key to my room always made a point of sighing and telling me how much of a hassle it was for them to have to retrieve the key....I get 1 lunch and 2 breaks while I'm there, yea, I'm sure it's really hard on you :roll: Anyway, the more mothers that started working there, the less they complained and just accepted it. On Friday I was at work and one of the people who has the key said to me as I was grabbing it from him "I think more mothers should do it this way." and I about hugged him right there lol. For a MAN to come out and say something like that...I was just blown away.

As far as breastfeeding in public, I'm kind of a closet nurser as well :oops: I've just heard so many horror stories of mothers being confronted or of cops being called because they were "exposing themselves". It's law in my state that a woman can breastfeed anywhere she is legally allowed to be, but the thought of getting into a confrontation while I'm bonding with my baby completely freaks me out. I'd use a hooter hider, but it's so freaking hot right now and I don't think that's fair to my daughter.

On a similar note, I'm thinking of making/getting a shirt that says "Breastfeeding is not a crime" and wearing it proudly :D Maybe one day I'll get the courage to actually do it.

And finally, regarding your choice to breastfeed for a long time (longer than most people do anyway...what's the average right now, like a month, if at all?), it's your choice. I've personally decided that I will attempt to make it 2 years, but will probably give my milk to her in a cup once she reaches a certain point and activity level. She's 11 weeks old now and is already so big and gets distracted so easily...I couldn't imagine trying to keep her focused enough once she's older lol.
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Postby jessm » Mon Jul 23, 2012 9:20 am

Yeah the RFing thing is going to be a fight I know it already. My MIL has a carseat for when she used to babysit. Well A: I'm pretty sure its expired B: it doesn't extended RF and 3: HELL NO. lol

I am not really a closet nurses. I NIP and actually have been confronted by the cops. However, it was bc someone called them on me, and they didn't know what I was doing until they got to my car. I just don't like when people get too close when NIP. My MIL kissed him on the cheek while I was BFing him yesterday. And someone else came and played with his feet. Personal space ppl. Personal space.
BFP 5/4/11 at 10 DPO with our first!
8/2/11 it's a BOY!!!
BFP 12/20/13 at 10 DPO with baby 2!
3/19/14 it's a GIRL!!!

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Postby jasmine55 » Tue Aug 21, 2012 1:40 am

I am looking for coupon codes for the hooter hider. I found some expired ones on retailmenot. Does anyone know of some active ones?

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Postby stefanielynn » Tue Aug 21, 2012 10:19 am

I think I would actually love it if people felt comfortable enough to come touch my baby while she is nursing. Sometimes I feel like an outcast when people realize what I'm doing and I have like a 5 foot buffer around me!
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Postby jessm » Wed Aug 22, 2012 6:51 am

I feel like there is a happy medium. My stepdad acts like I'm exposing myself. I nursed at a restaurant on Sunday WITH my cover and he got all upset that part of my stomach was showing and I jokingly said "wait till Declan starts trying to pull the cover off (his new thing)" and he turned around and wouldn't even look at me. My sister's 18 year old bf was more mature about it. I talked to my mom about it yesterday and she goes "he just doesn't want you to lose your dignity". My what? When I got offended she goes "don't be so harsh Jessica" really who's the harsh one. smh
BFP 5/4/11 at 10 DPO with our first!
8/2/11 it's a BOY!!!
BFP 12/20/13 at 10 DPO with baby 2!
3/19/14 it's a GIRL!!!

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