all breastfeeding mama's......

A *supportive* forum for mommies who are breastfeeding :-)

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all breastfeeding mama's......

Postby oktober84 » Thu Oct 18, 2012 9:14 am

For the BF'ing advocates out there. I just really have to express that its wonderful that you are spreading the word that breast is best, but I have come across a group of women who say they are advocating our message but at the same time are tearing other women down who choose to formula feed. We sometimes don't know their reasoning as to why they choose formula but it is just as wrong for us to call them down for not trying. We are trying to pass on a positive message. Not advocate that we are right and they are wrong. Please please remember when a woman tells you they formula feed not cringe your nose or look shocked because that woman may have been unable to feed their baby that is beyond their power or the power of natural remedies. The reason why I speak on this subject is because I had a woman come to our BF support group last night who formula fed. Why did I ask her to come? To show that we can still be a positive support as she decided now at 10 months post partum she would like to try and pump for her daughter. I was so impressed by all the ladies who took her under her wing. And she told us her story. She tried to pump 6 months PP but the previous group she joined for support made her feel incompetent and as if she should have made the pro breast choice from the beginning. Her story: Her child was concieved before her husband was deployed to afganistan. 2 months before the birth of her daughter she got every wife's worst news. Her husband died in combat. Shocked that what should have been a bright new life upon his arrival home was actually the opposite of what should have happen when he came home. She was put onto anti-depressants. And ended up delivering baby pre-term. She went thru a rough start PP and decided against breast feeding due to her meds. And when she joined the other support group they told her how she was wrong and could have worked thru her depression and made breast feeding work. We are advocates. We advocate breast is best no matter what point women decide to begin breast feeding. Even if they don't breast feed we are here to get the message out and not to discriminate. Just thought I would share.
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March 19 2009 Haley Gianna Mikaela was born 5lbs 15oz. (39+3 WEEKS)
April 11 2013-Lucas Brian Alexander 6lbs 6oz (36+4 WEEKS)
May 07 2015- Tenley Grace Daenarys 6 lbs 4oz (37 WEEKS)
Baby #4 due September 07 2017
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Re: all breastfeeding mama's......

Postby KJ511 » Thu Oct 18, 2012 12:48 pm

What a great reminder! Thanks for posting. All parenting decisions are very hard and no one should be judgmental of anyone else.
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Re: all breastfeeding mama's......

Postby stefanielynn » Fri Oct 19, 2012 6:28 am

I totally agree. I am a HUGE advocate of breastfeeding and I wish every mother would try it because I really do believe it is an amazing thing. BUT I also realize that there are so many circumstances and reasons why someone may be unable or unwilling. I definitely don't want to make moms feel unworthy or unsupported because they are bottle feeding. The thing I take a lot of issue with are "booby traps" and unsupportive professionals and family members. I feel like those are the outside factors that could most easily be improved and, in turn, would improve breastfeeding rates. But losing a husband in combat? The fact that she is still breathing and being a mother to that baby is amazing enough. I can't even imagine showing her anything but the highest respect (I am a military wife; seriously, my worst fear).
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Re: all breastfeeding mama's......

Postby jessm » Mon Oct 22, 2012 9:15 am

Its so true. I believe firmly that breast is best and don't understand why people choose to not even try. However, I never ever judge someone. Its up to them.
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Re: all breastfeeding mama's......

Postby BeccaM » Mon Oct 22, 2012 11:33 am

I am totally a breastfeeding advocate too (though I try not to be too outspoken and make enemies :) )

If someone has had a difficult birth experience, preemie, or other unforseen event, making it much harder to BF, I totally get why some moms can't BF. If a mom has done her best, tried to BF, but found it just didn't work out, I totally wouldn't judge them! I know it can be extremely difficult under certain situations.

To be honest (and I hope I don't offend but I am trying to be truthful) I think the only time I have an issue with formula feeding parents is when they never even seriously consider BF'ing at all, when there was no particular reason not to. Being afraid of trying something that has obviously so many great benefits for their child, even if it's a little harder and takes more effort at first, just doesn't make sense to me. But I am really trying not to judge ANYONE no matter what their choices...

I would fully support the mom in your story, Oktober. Anyone in a situation like that should definitely be treated with respect and compassion!
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Simon, born Mar 23rd, 2013 @ 39 weeks, 3 days. 8 lbs 4 oz. Our first home birth!!

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