Menu Search Account

TTC Advice and Tips

Not a good morning

I am new to this whole process. I am 39 and hubby is 41. We have "unexplained infertility" that has been going on for 7 years. I really had taken a "whatever will be, will be" attitude for years. I went and completed graduate school and focused on my career. This past year I realised that my insurance will only cover IUI/IVF treatment until I am 40. This prompted me to contact the RE that my sister used successfully. Long story short, decided to try IUI this month with Follistim/Ovidrel. I produced 9 follicles and have a lining of 7.8 as of yesterday morning. Since two of the follicles are "mature", they wanted to do my IUI this morning which is CD 11. We were all ready to go and my husband was told he could provide a sample and bring it in to the office. Well....he froze this morning....we tried everything we could think of and he just got more and more tense and unable to "perform". Ended up having to cancel my iui and we will try the old fashioned way today and tomorrow. I didn't really expect this to happen. He always enjoys sex but I think the pressure just became too much for him. Has anyone else had this problem? I just felt so defeated and sad this morning...... My doctor wants me to move on to IVF as I am making so many follicles and because of running out of insurance time. I am terrified to go through all that just to have my husband choke. He is such a great guy and I don't want to pressure him anymore. He also really wants a child as well. I have been reading about freezing your sperm. I think this may be the way to go so there is no worry of him not being ready on D-day!


Hi there.. i can relate! I'm 34, my DH is 30 and we have been TTC #1 for approx 4 years with unexplained fertility ( don't you just HATE that phrase!) Although we have not gone as far as seeking treatment as yet, in the past year my hubby started to get serious performance anxiety and we actually didn't have sex at all for about 4 months! it was like role reversal from the stereotype, when the woman says she has a headache.. that is pretty much what my hubby was doing! any excuse not to get down and do the deed. It all came to a head on our wedding anniversary when we had a couple of drinks and just sat and aired our feelings about the whole thing on neutral ground and in a relaxed atmosphere.. my husband told me how he was feeling and we talked about bringing the spark back into our love life and to try and stop sex feeling like a chore for him. we are sooo relaxed now, not just in the bedroom department and its great! I have also just ordered my first batch of preseed, and this is kinda our last hurrah before moving for treatment (we live in portugal where you dont get insurance for this kind of thing) and my hubby is actually looking forward to trying it out! I wish you all the luck in getting your little bundle of joy xxx